Everything that is now is consequence of decisions made in the past. This time last year I couldn't have had more faith in my "good friends." I argued against Michael, telling him how nice they were, that it just took time to get to know them, that they meant no harm. Yet after all these years, after all the great and positive experiences that I went through with them, I can't help but feel anything at all. I have apathy for those whom I once considered the closest to me. But honestly I feel I haven't lost anything at all. Whatever "friendship" I had with those counterfeit cronies is all but a disappointing memory of how better off my life is now without them in it. But hey, I'm all good. I'm better off knowing that you all don't exist to me anymore anyway. I mean that's how I've been treated, so why not reciprocate?
Just like what I told Bernadette before leaving her house the other night, I hate this. You are an exception Bernadette, because I know you have enough common sense to realize the sheer incapacity of those who swarm around you when they feel too. I find it amusing how your house was separated between me, and them. I didn't want to stay around any longer knowing how uncomfortable the air was getting, at least for me. Thus my whole saying of all or nothing. It's difficult to have a friend who is friends with people I could be more unconcerned about.
So all I have to say is this: you all can have your kicks hanging around your twisted little world of make believe even though most of you have already had your fair share of reality. But no, that doesn't phase any of you at all. Because as I see it, none of you grew up from any of it. Some more than others. When you all finally finish using and abusing one another for each of your own selfish and devious needs, then maybe you all will realize how incapacitated your sick games are to the rest of the world. But until then, I wish all the best in your indefinite forms of self-destruction.
I can't believe it took me so long to realize how worthless, pathetic, unimportant, trifling and most of all, pitiful you all are.
It's good that you can realize something like this. Otherwise it would slowly bring you down. If what you say is truth, then I congratulate you for getting yourself away from those people. Far too many times have I seen others ruined by similar situations. Anyway, it's really good to see you back around. There'll always be a spot for you at NuTang. » le_battement
on 2005-06-27 03:36:25
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