Sunday. 12.25.05 8:26 pm
its been a week or so since I've updated in a non-private entry.
My life has been treating me good. Everything seems to be going in my favor.
Progress reports were last week; I am doing awesome in all my classes. The only thing I'm worried about is my world cultures project, but I have hopes to get that finished during vacay. I probably won't but, I want to.
My relationship with Mr. Shawn Gowin? AMAZING. There is nothing that boy doesn't do. He's awesome...just, great. I feel something with him that I don't recall ever feeling in past relationship's...so who knows. I have high hopes though. He's nothing but great...just...wow. I can't even describe it. And he's so down to earth and doesn't tell me what to do...you know? He gives me just enough space to hang myself...it's weird. It used to be I'd fight for that leway with a guy, but here I have it...and I don't want it. I have no need...I am happy. and it's awesome.
My Christmas? Not bad. I've never been much of a materialistic girl, which is good cause I didn't get much for Christmas from the parents, but I'm not really worried about it. I got an awesome digital camera and some shoes and a few things I picked out. My dad made me sad today cause he was complaining about how much harder it is to buy for us kids then when we were younger. Then he's like..."If Ash was still here, I might have a grandkid to buy for..." That stuff makes me sad. The holidays are already like...lonely enough without him reminding me. Ash, Allie, and I used to do everything together around Christmas. I can hardly believe this is the 4th Christmas without Ash and the 3rd without Allie...or something like that. It makes me really sad. I'm thinking about going to see Allie, but I dunno if I can really handle it.
Shawn's sister Des, she reminds me alot of Allie. It makes me kinda sadddd...but at the same time, I love herrrr to pieces. She's so sweet.
A few people have been talking smack and getting involved in stuff that's not there business; Shawns and my relationship would be one of them. It's NO ONES place to try and say how I feel or whatever. He knows how I feel about him, and I know how he feels about me...and that's all that matters. Soo...to the people who feel the need to get involved...don't bother...you're waisting your time. I'm not going anywheres.=)
Work has been okay for me...not great, not bad. I kinda got into it last week with this kid Brian, and now I'm just straight up not talking to him. He's kinda immature anyways...and he acts like a total dick if you don't do what he wants, so forget him. I've learned that boys from Elmira don't have anything on country boy's. Like...I dunno. Elmira boys just play too many head games and they aren't real with you. I don't have time for that...
Ooh...Aweb got Kym and I chocolate for Christmas. Isn't that sweet? He's soo sweet. We made him cookies and Kym got him a movie. He's one of the few elmira boys I like. I hate when people try and bully him, it makes me want to kill them.
haha the other day, shawn picked me up from school and we went back to canton, and then up to Elmira. Well, eventually we headed to the mall...I drove. It was SCARYYYYYYY. Everyone was driving all scary and mean and agressive like. I hate that. People need to calm the heck down.
Ooh, Josh and I have been talking again. I'm not sure how I feel about that. Everytime he gets involved in my life, my relationships with guys go to hell. I mean, me and that boy go back...and he'salways been there for me but...I'm not willing to risk what I have with Shawn to hang out with him. That's horibble, but, Shawn is the most important thing in the world to me at the moment.
Well, I've kind of run out of things to talk about. So, I hope everyone has a great and safe holiday.
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