today was pretty boring; mostly chilled around at home and jus...read and jus...enjoyed being home. =)

then Kym and Andy came up about 5 and we chilled while i put sims on her computer. Yayy, shes getting the internet soo, that's cool. I was so happy to see Andy. I can't explain my feelings for him. He jus...makes me estatic. Something, I haven't felt in a long time. I dunno, it's good tho.

Justin is angry at me. I can understand him point, I really can. But, he won't look at things from my point of view. If you show no interest in someone, they're going to move on. No one wants to feel like they're not important...and that's how he made me feel. And it hurt, especially when he was the reason I breathed and my everything. And I guess I can't control how I feel about Andy; he doesn't understand that my feelings for Andy never showed up till after we were broken up and he started coming around more.

I guess I don't need to explain myself to anyone anymore. I jus, I want to be his friend. I don't want a relationship to end like mine and Ryans where we hate each other and don't talk. Cause, man, I care about him so much and I don't want him out of my life. I jus, don't want to be his girl friend. I think that was maybe our problem in our relationship. We were too busy being gf/bf to bother being friends and asking questions. That's what I like about Andy. Hes so curious about everything about me...always wanting to know things. Always asking how I'm feeling and knowing what's wrong.

I talked to Joshy tonite. I miss him; I wish he'd come home.

Life goes on though.

and that's about all I've figured out about life...

wow. those was some strong emo-ness in that. it seems as tho your prblem is that you are infatuated with andy, and do not want to be with justin, but you want to be his freind, and that he wants to get back with you. i think that i tit. i am a little dumb when it comes to things lie that, but i kinda know what you are going thru. i had the same problem with my ex, and a girl whom i knew for like a week, and thought i was in love with her. i found out i didn't want to be with my ex, so i wrote a note (leaving out the other girls' name) which explained everything. after that all was well, but i didn't get with the other girl because she moved, but...well..you see my point. i dont know if this helped, but i hope it did.
» zero_jak on 2005-07-30 11:46:30

well..
you seem very happy with Andy.. and i have no idea who he is.. but Justin really pisses me off.. i can see that you are hanging out with this guy getting to know him to see if you could possibly get with him.. and i saw Justin at the fair and hes like.. hey allison.. you got any hot friends here.. and it just pissed me right off.. im like thinking.. justin your a dick.. i dunno.. it bothered me how he could get over you that quick.. hmm.. well anyways.. i hope that you are happy with Andy and that he treats you like you deserve.. your a great girl Amanda and i looooooove loooooooove looooooove you :) Bye sweetie!!
» alliehall07 on 2005-07-31 11:22:59

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