Negative.

Negative on it being the most wonderful time of the year. Here's why.

And yes, all of it relates to work.

I went in to work today... finished up around 10 PM... and I'll be back there tomorrow morning at 8 AM... awesome. I love closing and then opening the day after... it's probably my favorite thing in the entire world.

Oh wait... nevermind that. My favorite thing in the entire world is BLACK FRIDAY. You know, that time of year where thousands upon thousands of people get suckered into going shopping because it's the "heaviest shopping day of the year".

Yeah, bullshit -- anybody who has ever gone to a mall on Christmas Eve (like I do every damn year) knows that is the busiest shopping day of any year.

Anyway, the higher-ups at the Cocaine Industry decided that the best possible thing to do on Black Friday is to open the store at 5 AM... as opposed to the usual ... 10 AM.

Are we seeing where this is going yet?

Yes, I will be at that God-forsaken hell hole filled with electronic evil from 4:30 AM until 1 PM... on Black Friday.. and, while it may not be the busiest shopping day of the year, it is certainly the second sleepiest day of the year for me.... seconded only by January 1st... because that = hungover sleepy... which leads to the best sleeping EVER...

And that brings me to another point.

Is passing out not the greatest thing the human body does?

Sure, a lot of people will offer up the idea of the immune system, or giving birth... but if you get HIV or AIDS.. see ya immune system... and if you're not able to get pregnant.. see ya birth...

But with either of those conditions, drink enough booze -- and you're passing out... it's fun for the whole family, even grandma.

Other than the few times in my life where my body successfully fended off alcohol poisoning (without the help of bitch-ass hospitals) passing out, no matter how long for is like a super-healing process. Your body decides "hey champ, you had a good night... it's time to cut it out." And bam... you're asleep... and it can be in a variety of places such as:
- a couch
-maybe a bed
-next to a toilet
-in your running car with the windows down and your pants undone... while the condom in your pocket from last night is now missing.. and you vaguely remember going back to the car with a girl
-next to your bed
-in prison
-next to a friend who has mysteriously fallen and is now bleeding from just above his eye
-in a cemetary
-or if you're really lucky... next to a horse.

All of these are possibilities when you pass out.

It adds adventure to your life, and I think it's a good thing.

Anyway, the point of this whole thing is I hate work... and I need a sweet job as a janitor somewhere.

Love,
Chris

i feel your black friday pain...
today i booked a sitting for 21 children under 12.... aka: kill me because they requested yours trully.... if you hear about spontaneous combustion and or 4 alarm fires spreading throughout montgomery mall about 1030am....youll know its me.
» invisibleinkling on 2006-11-20 11:21:35

fuck the Cocaine Industry on Black Fridays.
I went to the Montgomeryville Circuit City after all of my other shopping. Their parking lot is maximum retarded. I had to complete the circuit through both seperate portions of their parking lot three times before getting a spot. And I went in to look at MP3 players. There's a cash register next to the displays of MP3 players. No one would move an inch so I could see a single one of them...let alone look at the specs and select one to purchase.

So I walked out the door and burned down the store in my mind. I walked to my car being stalked by a line of 15+ cars to take my spot after I'd pull out of it. The first car behind me wasn't giving me enough room to safely back out. So I unsafely backed out. And blew up the other car with an RPG..in my head again.

And then I preceeded to wait in line for 15 minutes to get out of the damned parking lot to go home.
» etheracide on 2006-11-27 07:00:45

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