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Brother
Tuesday. 6.1.04 9:30 pm
I love my brother. He always takes care of me. He's so cool.

I'm sad. I wish I could please my parents. Everything I seem to do always seems to be the opposite.

I don't know anymore. Everything just...I hurt. I don't want to hurt anymore. I don't want to. Not anymore. No no. I want to be happy like the other kids and make tons of friends and have a good time. When people are happy, it makes me happy. It's like I have a chance of reaching that happiness too one day. I wonder how long it will take. I'm tired of sitting around and waiting. I want to go out and play and have lots of fun. I want to run in the mud and get all dirty. And wrestle with all my friends. It's raining outside! I'm cool. I was never scared of the thunder. Thunder doesn't scare me! Sometimes I wish the lightning would take me away. Kind of like in those movies where I can go to a different planet! That would be cool! To meet other aliens! Are we aliens? Do you think aliens from different planets think of us as aliens? Do you think they would do nasty experiments on us like we would do to them on the movies? That's not very nice. I wonder if there are mean aliens. I don't think I want the lightning to take me away anymore. I might get kidnapped by mean aliens and I won't be able to go home. I want to go play in the rain! But I don't think my mommy will let me cause then I'll get sick. That's what she says. But I don't understand how I can get sick from just getting wet. I mean, isn't it just like taking a shower? Yeah. That's what I think. Or it's like going swimming except you can't drown in rain. I wish I could go play in the rain. I want to get into a mud fight. I've seen them on tv and they look like a bunch of fun. But I don't have any friends that will play with me. I always play by myself. It's no fun at all. I'm sad. No one loves me. I'm always in the dark. In my room, playing with stuff animals. It gets boring. But I have no where else to go. I don't like the dark room though. It's scary. Very scary. At night, there are shadows that come out of the wall and try to kill me. I hide under my blankie and pretend that I'm dead so they think I'm dead so they won't kill me.

I'm going to try to get my playstation 2 back. Buh baiz!

Games are the one thing that makes me happy!
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