I'm so pissed off. My entry just got fucking deleted when I pressed the back button on the keyboard. That's soo fucking fucked up. Piece of shit. Ugh. It doesn't matter, I'm not going to bother retyping. Max is coming back out. I can feel him. My mind has been so quiet and calm this past few days, other then from the boredom and my thoughts, but now, I can feel him again. Not to mention, I'm all anxious about school starting back up. I really did like ISS a whole lot better. I was so alone and I didn't have people watching me and I didn't have to talk to anyone. I could just be by myself. Blah. I think this is what this feeling is...anxiety. Fun. I think that's why I go through the whole day of school feeling numb and detatched. Cause I manage to block the feeling off. At least, I don't have anxiety attacks like Brandi. It's only cause I know how to block it off. That thought disturbs me. I need to learn how to think when the high feeling starts to settle in. I had the most fucked up dream last night. I was about to get fucking raped in my dream, but then Bettie called, thank goodness, and it didn't happen cause well, I woke up. But yeah, I was about to get raped and abused by this chick who managed to kill my dad some how in my house, and she was wearing his skin and talking like him, but it was the scary asian chick who kinda looked like a ghost. The chick was suppose to be the chick from that BDSM story I was reading, but she was asian. Her name was CaineKaine. Caine was the chick was now...and Kaine was the chick she was back then. Oh fuck! This makes sense. Ohh...fucking...shit. Max manages to communicate to me through a dream. Unbelievable. My head hurts and the high is coming in. Terrific. I don't need this, not right now. Ughhh. I'm sooo confused.

*grimace*
» painless on 2004-03-14 11:14:53

Sorry, you do not have permission to comment.

If you are a member, try logging in again or accessing this page here.