Can u think of anyone in your life right now that u really care about, but there’s something about them that bothers u and u have no idea if u should tell them or not? Well I'm kind of in that position right now… it’s the whole stereotypical crap… I mean “they” don’t like it when they get labeled and stereotyped… but then they themselves label others… I mean if that’s not hypocritical then what is? There are times when I want to tell them about it… but then is it THAT big of a deal? I might hurt their feelings… maybe I’m just asking to much… **confused**

Eh… another problem… right now… I don’t feel like I’m needed anymore… or loved… people would be all like “oh you’re my best friend… blah…blah… blah…” but when it really comes down to it… I question if they really care for me or not… to be reading someone’s entry and they say something like “o fukk everyone… I hate everybody…” bleh… when in retrospect just the day b4 they’re hugging u and liking u… makes u wonder if they ever think about me when the write that… does that mean they hate me too? And they whole “hugging” was just a cover?

I’m so fukkin naïve sometimes… I no that friendships don’t last forever and that the people that you’re friends with now won’t even know that you exist 5 years from now… you might have more than 10 close friends right now, but 5 years from now only about 2 people would stay with you… if you’re lucky… 3… I know that for a fact… but I just keep being in self-denial and keep telling myself that all the things going on at school right now are just temporary… and that things will back to the way they were before… but the FACT is things will NEVER go back to the way they were… I mean, I’m making new friends and adding on the list of “best friends” and the names that was on there before are slowly fading away like someone’s taking an eraser and slowly wiping the names of the list… it saddens me really… but what really sadden me it’s how I keep running away from reality… I live in this oblivion world where the cute little Nina is the center of attention with all her good grades and sweet ways… I know there’s more to myself than that… but if I were to go and be something else… then I wouldn’t be sitting at the lunch table eating lunch with my usual “group”… I wouldn’t be Nina, alex’s best friend, Nina conan’s girlfriend… nina ash’s friend or nina who gets along with just about everybone… but slowly being interactive with EVERYONE is tearing me apart… does that sound shallow and stupid? It does to me… but I just can’t help it…

Sometimes I just want to start all over… strip free of my ignorant self and be the person that I really am and attract the people that like me for who I am… I wish that sometimes people could just stop for a minute and take a good look at me… ‘cause there’s more to meet the eyes… it’s hard to believe this but I intimidate some people… and I just don’t know why…

There are only about 2-3 people right now that I actually care about and actually give a crap if something happens to them… I’m not gonna name any names… but with the conditions and how things are goin and the attitude that they carry around right now leave my heart for just the exceptional few… and the sad thing is I don’t even know if those exceptional few feel the same way about me… =( sadness…

hypocritical? labeling? i didnt mean that i actually hated those people i just meant i hated the the idea that people could be shut in a box like that. and the whole hating thing... i dont hate you and i dont hate everybody. i just notice everybody else's faults... and i notice mine even more... it was just a figure of speach... it didnt mean that i actually hated everyone. . . and people do care about you... if you go by the comment that you gave me then this is just a 'faze' that all teens go through... ( it isnt but most people feel that way sometimes... you know i do) cheer up. i care about you. hugs kisses and all that mushy stuff.
» how_to_start_a_fire on 2003-12-17 07:08:14

uuhh....
I feel your pain nina, but still, that was actually pretty low to say that you dont care about anyone but 2 or 3 people. I know that many people care about you, and I don't know if I am one of teh people on your 'list' of people you care about, but you are on mine. You have to think about the people who care about you, and maybe take a good look at them. Mayeb if you re-think how you see people, they will do the same for you. I know that if anything happened to ANY of my friends I would nbe devestated. But to say that you dont care..That is just unimaginable to me. You do not seem the type to say things like that. As for wanting people to see you for you, you could start by BEING YOU. The people who care will stand by you, but it seems that you only want '2 or 3' people to stay. As far as I know, no one thinks of you as nina ash's friend. Well, at least I don't. It is you who is holding youself back, so set yourself free. Be who you are, and don't let anyone tell you who you are. You have people who care abotu you, even if you don't care about them.
» fRoDoS*lOvEr on 2003-12-18 08:58:41

This idea is necessary just by the way
I consider, what is it ? lie. cheap adipex Takes a bad turn. buy ativan There are also other lacks buy levitra online What entertaining message levothyroxine price I believe, that you are not right. rimonabant without prescription 16d6979
» Davis (201.45.71.43) on 2011-07-08 05:29:36

Name.

URL.

[to enter your email, use "mailto:[email protected]"]
Subject.

Comment.

Word verification.

Copy the first 4 characters only.

If you are a member, try logging in again or accessing this page here.