I am an addict.

There. I said it. It's very hard for me to admit, but it's time I faced the truth.

I have been addictified by the addictiveness of eBay.

Curse the person who came up with eBay. It's nefarious. Snagging unsuspecting victims, latching onto the inner auctionphile within, and trapping them forever and ever with promises of great deals and you have 2 items ending soon and 1 minute left!

I think about eBay constantly. My schedule is filled with the end times of a multitude of auctions. My alarm clock was set for 4.46am just so I could make the last minute winning bid.

You nutter, my friends say. You nutter, you can buy that Crinkle Style Black Shirt with Detailed Stitching Down the Left Sleeve BNWT at the shops. Yes, that's true. But will I be able to get it for half price at the shops? No! Don't you see?! eBay's so much better!!! Everyone should shop on eBay! THINK OF HOW MUCH MONEY YOU'LL SAVE!!! (Look at how I'm abusing exclamation marks without a second thought as to their wellbeing. That's how strongly I believe in eBay.)

I could wax lyrical about the bids I've won. Just like how big game hunters share war stories, we eBayers swap tactics and anecdotes about the one that almost got away. Every winning bid leaves me suffused with a warm glow of satisfaction and soothes the materialistic beast within me.

But at what cost?

I have no social life. I disappear between classes to check if anyone has outbid me. I've declined invitations to parties because an auction would end during the party. At those that I did attend, I spent the whole night rooted in front of a borrowed computer, obsessively tracking the item(s) I was bidding on.

At a bar the other night, I was waiting for a drink when a guy tapped me on the arm. He was at that perfect age, just into his thirties, with a sexy smile and roguish good looks. He breathed into my ear, "I've been watching you since you arrived, you delectable young thing you. I want you so much that it's killing me. Come home with me and we'll have wild, mind-blowing sex all night long and all day tomorrow."

Hmm, tempting.

He winked at me. "I'm from New Zealand and I play rugby."

Sold. I grabbed him and started to drag him towards the exit. But then I remembered.

"Sorry, I've got an auction ending in an hour and a half."

Categories: Misc [t]

Good times.
Sounds like Ebay is your crack.
» Dilated on 2006-10-24 12:43:09

I want that sexy roguish NZ rugby player. Can I bid for him? Hope you do deliver to Malaysia.

Hey, I'm in that perfect age range too!

EBAY is great but I hate paying for delivery sometimes. Sigh.
» Paul (219.95.183.60) on 2006-10-24 02:12:44

JAMESIES!!!!!!!!!! what is wrong with you????????????????? quit now while you can!
» Qian (149.135.98.44) on 2006-10-24 09:20:28

You nutter!
Ebay is too expensive of an addiction for me to get addicted too.
» dave on 2006-10-24 11:28:18

Sounds worrying, James. Sounds like eBay will make you broke and sleepless . . think of all the poor guys who don't get to share in your company!

Funny, my verification code's e3abya, almost an eBay acronym.
» (219.95.132.18) on 2006-10-25 04:06:55

Oh, last post was by Kuan Eng. It appears that I have forgotten how to leave comments properly. Apologies for spamming.
» KE (219.95.132.18) on 2006-10-25 04:09:49

i have that problem. when i lose a bid, i turn green, and rip off my shirt.

actually, no. i just get angry. but you get the idea.

p.s. thank goodness for your now HUGE word verification. i'll no longer go blind trying to post a comment in here!

p.p.s i got caught out and typed the whole thing. several times. i now feel like a dool. first 4 characters only? pfft. DAMMIT!
» bUttsH4k3r (83.100.252.113) on 2006-10-25 07:42:27

what lies!!! like someone would approach a midget like you and ask you out for sex! and you being such a unresponding zombie wouldn't even want to go out with him! Who the heck cares if he's from NZ and plays rugby! its lies!! you trying to bluff me?!?!?!
» jase (219.90.246.250) on 2006-10-26 01:59:15

Quite a large lie. I find ebay to be America's trash yard of old, broken electronics. I have not found a single item worth buying for me on ebay. :(
» ryan444123 on 2006-10-27 11:59:47

A co-worker, ok more then one, loves EBay. They are always finding great deals on it. I can totally relate, but only because I have other addictions I plan my life around. XD
» Katrina on 2006-10-30 04:53:10

ebay
nooo! they charge ya 5% of the profit if u sell. lol.
» kathyjane on 2006-11-01 01:55:25

Hola Jimmy James! :D How're you doing?? Missing you loads!! And guess what?? You're not the only one addicted to that freaking e-bay...count me in! Although I've to admit that I get quite annoyed with it sometimes due to my terrible bidding skills!! Out of the 10 times I bidded, I've probably only won maybe...2 or 3 times? This is how sucky I am! Anyway...hope to hear from you soon! Muchos besos!
» Karen (62.254.32.17) on 2006-11-01 03:10:09

You've convinced me...

I shall never ever ever shop on eBay!!!

...Selling there, however, is another matter.
» Laynie (219.95.168.149) on 2006-11-05 11:14:57

So am I
I am addicted to ebay too! It is horrible. I cant stop!! I have been lectured by my boyfriend and he even ordered me to stay off! ha ha!
» kkama67 on 2006-11-05 11:53:35

Uggh
It is a horrible addiction. For awhile I can stop bidding but then I go crazy and spend to much money! Ugggh...
» stlcardsgal86 on 2006-11-05 09:12:26

if i was old enough
if i was old enough, i bet i would be addicted to it too. lol.
» dannixfresh on 2006-11-05 09:36:08

Hahaha, ebay. I'm trying to use my NuVenue to buy a cheap violin....
» ikimashokie on 2006-11-06 12:36:26

I've brought ome stuff off there, but it seems like it takes so long to find the products that are ctually good! hahaha loving ur 'predicament' thought ;).
Just shows ur obsession. Juts out of Curiosity what was the item that was ending in an hour and a half?
» Tsukiko on 2006-11-06 03:18:37

Phwoar, mass reply! Sorry it took so long!
Dilated: Unfortunately, it can get just as expensive.

Paul: I know what you mean! Sometimes I fall in love with stuff and it's super cheap, only to find out that it's from Hong Kong and deliver will cost AUD 80! Sob sob sob.
And to think you were all depressed during your birthday.

Qian: Cannot!! I'm hooked!!

dave: Ebay is the reason I live on instant noodles.

KE: I know, I should stop being so selfish. ;)
Btw, I wanna see Ben when I get back!!! And your Z4!! I miss it!! And err, you too. :D

bUttsh4k3r: I still can't type your nick without typos...
I wanna be in the same room when you lose a bid then. Moohahaha!

jase: Haha, someone sounds jealous!

ryan444123: Unbeliever!! But then, I use the Australian eBay, moohahaha!

Katrina: Mmm, addictions. They make life worth living.

kathyjane: I know, it's such a rip off! That's why I only buy stuff on eBay.

Karen: HULLO CARROT!! I was wondering which Karen you were, and then I remembered that only YOU call me Jimmy James! I miss you too!!! Aha, the trick is to wait till the last 30 secs or so then launch in with your bid and imagine the last bidder writhing in misery! MOOHAHAHAHA!

Laynie: You've got another addiction anyway...camwhoring. :D But that's what all hot girls should do.

kkama67: Dump him. You gotta have your priorities right. Ho ho ho!

stlcardsgal86: Thank god for nutang revenue payouts!

dannixfresh: You're never too young to eBay. Come over to the nail side of the thumb!

ikimashokie: Bless dave for coming up with NuVenue. But wouldn't you want to try a violin out before buying it?

Tsukiko: It takes a LOT of patience. And clicking. But that's why it's such a rush when you do get something great! And it's kind of sad that I just described it as a rush...
I was bidding on a DVD boxset of Seasons 1 and 2 of Queer as Folk (UK). It was going for AUD 10! And I did a last minute bid, only to be beaten in the last 10 secs by 50 cents!!! AARGHHHH!!!!!! DISASTER!!!!!
» theZEBRA on 2006-11-06 10:23:08

haha ebay has you on a leash
» changbang on 2006-11-10 02:21:44

changbang: I'm not sure how I'll cope without a computer when I'm away for the next two weeks!
» theZEBRA on 2006-11-15 02:20:13

And there is a similar analogue?
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» Herman (119.167.219.78) on 2010-09-05 08:39:16

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