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A few words
"When we describe the Moon as dead, we are describing the deadness in ourselves. When we find space so hideously void, we are describing our own unbearable emptiness." ~ D.H. Lawrence "Is the meaning of life defined by its duration? Or does life have a purpose so large that it doesn't have to be prolonged at any cost to preserve its meaning?" "Living is not good, but living well. The wise man, therefore, lives as well as he should, not as long as he can... He will always think of life in terms of quality not quantity... Dying early or late is of no relevance, dying well or ill is... even if it is true that while there is life there is hope, life is not to be bought at any cost." ~ Seneca "People will tell you nothing matters, the whole world's about to end soon anyway. Those people are looking at life the wrong way. I mean, things don't need to last forever to be perfect." ~ Daydream Nation "All Bette's stories have happy endings. That's because she knows where to stop. She's realized the real problem with stories-- if you keep them going long enough, they always end in death." ~ The Sandman: Preludes & Nocturnes "The road now stretched across open country, and it occurred to me - not by way of protest, not as a symbol, or anything like that, but merely as a novel experience - that since I had disregarded all laws of humanity, I might as well disregard the rules of traffic. So I crossed to the left side of the highway and checked the feeling, and the feeling was good. It was a pleasant diaphragmal melting, with elements of diffused tactility, all this enhanced by the thought that nothing could be nearer to the elimination of basic physical laws than deliberately driving on the wrong site of the road." ~ Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita "It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend." ~ William Blake Think about it Musicalities! Kill that boredom!
Binder Paper Comics Web Comics and Such A Distant Soil (Some nudity) The Adventures of Gyno-Star (Some explicit stuff) Aquapunk Axe Cop Basic Instructions Bear Nuts Beeserker Blue Milk Special Bug Buttersafe ChannelATE Cigarro & Cerveja Crunchy Bunches Curia Regis Cyanide and Happiness dead winter (has some explicit stuff) Devilbear: The Grimoires of Bearalzebub (PG-13?) Diesel Sweeties DUBBLEBABY Eat That Toast! E-merl.com The End Evil Diva Evil Inc. Existential Comics The Fancy Adventures of Jack Cannon For Lack of a Better Comic Forming (Explicit) Girls with Slingshots (some explicit stuff...?) Mirror The Last Halloween Last Train to Old Town L.A.W.L.S. The League of Evil Genius Legend of Bill Living With Insanity (some nudity) Love Me Nice Married to the Sea Meaty Yogurt Medium Large The Meek Metacarpolis Monsterhood Monsterkind The Moon Prince Moth (Some nudity) Mr. Lovenstein Muddlers Beat Natalie Dee Nedroid The Non-Adventures of Wonderella Optipess Out There Owen's Uncles Phuzzy Comics Political Cartoonists Index Poorly Drawn Lines Powernap The Property of Hate Red Meat Rice Boy Robbie and Bobby Rosscott, Inc. Safely Endangered Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal Savage Chickens Scary Go Round Scenes from a Multiverse The Secret Knots Serenity Rose Stand Still. Stay Silent Stinking Hellebore Strong Female Protagonist Subnormality Tales of Pylea Three Word Phrase (some nudity) Tiny Kitten Teeth Toothpaste for Dinner Trying Human (Some nudity) Two Guys and Guy Wilde Life Witchy xkcd Yellow Peril (PG-13) Infrequently/No Longer Updating Web Comics The Abominable Charles Christopher The Adventures of Dr. McNinja The Adventures of Ellie Connelly American Hell Bag of Toast Bear in Mind Bobwhite The Book of Biff Brat-halla Brightest Broodhollow Bullfinch Camp Weedonwantcha Chain Bear (Some explicit stuff) Chainsawsuit Conspiracy Friends! Daisy is Dead Distillum Dream Life Dumm Comics Ectopiary (Some nudity) Edemia Edmund Finney's Quest to Find the Meaning of Life A Fine Example Finn and Charlie are HITCHED Floodmud Freaks! Green Wake Gun Show Hark! A Vagrant Head Doctor Productions Hello with Cheese Helpful Figures Hollow Mountain IDK Comics Inscribing Ardi Intragalactic The Intrepid Girlbot JBabb Comics Kyle & Atticus Lesbian Pirates from Outer Space Letters to a Wild Boar Lovecraft is Missing Manta-man Meat and Plastic Minimalism Sucks Mis- Moe Moon Town The Nerds of Paradise Nimona No Reason Comics Odd-Fish One Swoop Fell Patches Pictures for Sad Children Raymondo Person A Redtail's Dream Riotfish Roy's Boys (PG 13?) Run Freak Run Saint's Way Shortpacked! Sin Titulo Snowflakes Split Lip Spooky Doofus SubCulture Super Buzzkill The Super Fogeys The Super Gay Adventures of Ross Boston Thermohalia Troubletown Mirror Ugly Girl YU + ME 2815 Monument Pure Flash Awesomeness Aardvardkbutter.com Angry Alien Die Anstalt : Toy Psychiatry The Frown Hoogerbrugge Other Bogleech Clients from Hell Brian Despain Creatures in My Head Damn You Auto Correct! Jhonen Vasquez's site Overheard in New York Passive Aggressive Notes Submarinechannel.com Superdickery UHpinions Whirled | Gym/good things/other... things Friday, February 26, 2016 Gym time today: 2 hours. Total this week: 14 hours. Bootcamp, then an hour (close to an hour and a half, but I'm rounding down) of random other stuff. I took it easy today because Bootcamp is usually tiring, so I just walked on the treadmill at 3mph at a level 9/10 incline for half an hour, then did Stairmaster for half an hour. Also did some upper body stuff on the weight machines, because... I dunno, they were there. In high school I could bench 75 lbs, but I can't do anywhere near that now, and I feel like I could probably build back up to that if I tried. There's no bench press at my gym, though, just a chest press machine, which I guess is basically the same thing anyway... Good things today: -Only had two babies at work this morning, so it was a super easy and relaxed few hours. That was super nice, because I was really really tired from last night, haha. I only got about four hours of sleep and my perception of time was really distorted. The two babies we had were also ones that are pretty happy just doing their own thing, so didn't have to deal with crying for the most part. -I went grocery shopping with my dad and he bought me a chocolate bar from Trader Joe's. :D It's this new Fireworks one that has chili and Pop Rocks type stuff in it. Normally my dad doesn't want to get any "frivolous" stuff when we go grocery shopping, so that was cool. -SL sent me a short message saying he just wanted to check in and see how I did on my interview! It'd been awhile since his last reply, so I was surprised (but happy) to get that it. -I woke up lookin' cute today, despite only getting a few hours of sleep. Not that there was anybody around to appreciate it, but oh well. I was pleased. Tomorrow I get to hang out with my friends! Looking forward to that. I'm going to try to remember to talk to them about going to Maker Faire in a few months. --- I had a dream that I ran into the ex before my last one and asked him how he was doing. He said he had adopted two kids since we broke up. I was somewhat surprised, and said it was funny how things turned out, but that I hoped he was doing well and was happier with his life. Alex said it was amazing that I've been able to forgive that ex for everything that happened between us, and that I genuinely hope he's just doing alright and can find happiness. I'm not sure if I personally consider it amazing. I want to be able to forgive anybody, ideally. Have had some trouble with forgiving one person in the past few months, because I felt like they made almost no visible efforts (and yet complain I don't acknowledge their efforts-- but how can I acknowledge something they aren't showing me?) to make up for what they did, and they've treated me pretty poorly overall. No respect, no trying to figure out to make amends, no real work put into being better in the future. Just weak, empty wishes to be better with no substance behind them. But maybe that's all you can get from a person like that. Someone who won't make promises because it's too much of a commitment, or too hard, or they'll just forget. I'm done believing them when they say they want to be better, because the reality is that they don't stick to that at all. I'm tired of being disappointed and hurt by what end up feeling like lies. It just seems like this person has lied to me over and over again and only told the truth when it would hurt me. I know they've read my blog in the past-- I doubt they're bothering now-- but I feel that they could read all this and either not feel particularly bad or just uselessly apologize without supporting the apology with any forward-moving action. And I need to give up on ever hoping this person will change, or make up for all the wrong. They're not going to do that. They are going to run away because problems are scary, or they're going to withdraw and avoid it (which is essentially the same thing). A shell of apathy around a core of cowardice. And they justify this cowardice by claiming to seek some kind of... I don't even know... inner peace? Tranquility? I have nothing against these concepts per se, but I find them despicable when they come at the cost of showing true compassion and care for others. I don't find anything redeemable about goals that are entirely self-serving in that way, regardless of what they are. Typing all that up made me feel kind of irritated, but this came on in iTunes and had a soothing effect. I'll count that as a good thing for the day. "Tristram" by Matt Uelman. This song always reminds me of being a kid and watching my dad play Diablo. It's comforting and familiar and right now it's wrapping me up and gently trimming away those unproductive angry thoughts. 0 Comments.
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