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come on over the mountain


dave
Age. 41
Gender. Male
Ethnicity. Chinese
Location Valley Village, CA
School. Cornell Univ
» More info.
kick the dawg
73th day of 2004
A week till spring break. I think time goes faster as it goes on, literally.

I've gotten hooked on the apprentice. It is the ultimate show.

The show brings back fond memories of my own apprenticeship, with Jack Blacksmith, back in the primeval days. Jack was a lazy bastard. Day in and day out, he would send me to the forest with a paper hatchet. Relying on the power of the paper cut, I had to gather fire wood and hunt game for the day's meals. I did this for over three years.

Then, one weary night, I came home and found Jack drunk. He looked up as I came in, and proceeded to yell gibberish at me, calling me foul names like "Ginkgo biloba breath." I felt the rage crawl up my spine, like an Egyptian spider ascending the pyramid of arthropodista. I've had enough.

In a sudden surge of adrenalin, I leaped over four mountains and sliced off Jack's face with my hatchet. "I quit!" I retorted, and left.

"You're fired..." he slurred back.

I never saw Jack again. Although, several years back, I did try to look him up. The locals all told different stories of his whereabouts. Some said he had retired into the forest, having lost his face, and changed into a bear. Others said he soldered an iron mask permanently onto his head and became a merchant of Venice. Whatever the case, I hope he knows that I will always miss him.
All content copyright by dave. Please do not reproduce, recycle, or regurgitate without the express written consent of the CTU.
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11 Comments.

ur fired
i saw 2 donald trund
» dean on 2004-03-13 07:11:50

hey hey
i know.. time does seem to go faster as it goes on and ive been watching the apprentice lately too.. weird.. anyways.. whats up?
» djjester on 2004-03-14 11:46:07


hahaha I LOVE THAT SHOW!
» hollaatme on 2004-03-14 08:36:53


hey dave. just dropping by to say hello! . . .hello!
» deviouslint on 2004-03-15 08:16:29


lucky...my Spring Break is in like a month..haha
» Ajibalaji89 on 2004-03-16 07:53:10


during my spring break, the easter rabbit sneaks into my house, leaves some candy, and takes all the money out of my wallet. then, my dad uses the money to go to a hooker bar.
» le_battement on 2004-03-17 08:09:38

nice

» invisible on 2004-03-18 05:38:44


dude, you need to fix the logout thing. change it to http://nutang.com/home.php?log_out. taking out the www helps for some reason.
» le_battement on 2004-03-22 08:37:12

can i borrow it
your imagination. for like, 1 day. (and note i said borrow not rent, in case you were getting some weird scheme in your head)
» Jay_Mestizo on 2004-03-24 03:46:57

DAVE!!!!
nutang not letting me log out, again. can you fix that or is it just one hell-of-a glich?
» lostsoul on 2004-03-27 05:04:20


lostsoul, didn't you read my comment? put http://nutang.com/home.php?log_out into your browser to log out.
» le_battement on 2004-03-28 10:36:27

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