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dannixfresh
Age. 32
Gender. Female
Ethnicity. Filipino
Location , CA
School. Other
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boundaries
Thursday. 6.23.11 9:16 pm
so i found out one of my friends went pretty far with her boyfriend in the bedroom. no sex, but boundaries were crossed. I mean, yeah, sex is something everyone has or will experience one day, but that's what I am worried about for myself.

See, my friend is the purest of the pure. Sweet, loving, and always watches out for boundaries. But just one time, and it led to her doing something she partially felt was wrong. we both are for having sex after marriage, and this happened just one random day.

Well, she is very responsible, and I am not. I am reckless, live for the moment, and I never think of the consequences. If my friend, who thinks about the future can get caught up in a situation like hers, then doesn't that mean that I am more susceptible to accidentally going all the way with my future boyfriend?

I know sex is something that a lot of people have. But personally, I truly want to wait until marriage. It just worries me how easy it is to get caught up in sexual acts. When I have my next boyfriend, I hope we have boundaries, and stick by them until we are married (if I marry him).

I am not condemning anyone who is having sex before marriage, or have gotten close to it. I am just saying, that if other people who are more careful than I that have a desire to save themselves but STILL get caught up in this, then I am in some deep waters when I am in a relationship.

I guess I'll just need some mad boundaries, like we could only be in a room alone together for a limited time. Or maybe, that only one of us can be on the bed while the other is sitting in a chair. Ha, yeah, those are weird boundaries. But I guess, whatever it takes right? It's easy though, to make these boundaries when you are not in a relationship. But once you are in love and such, boundaries easily go out the window. And that is what I fear >.<
5 Comments.


Hm, I wonder about what kind of boundaries you are talking about... Because I think making out in bed is okay... It's the same as making out anywhere else except more private, repetitive, and easier to relax. *TMI right here*

I don't think it has to do anything with boundaries. I mean, if you really love him, and he really loves you, you guys should be able to meet somewhere in between. You don't have to establish boundaries to stop from crossing the lines. Get him to draw the lines with you : D That's the fun part about relationships. Talk about it on the first day. "Okay dude, I'm not going to do this or that :D Just saying." Y'know, get it all out : )

RE: Yeah :/ Sucks how years ago, I thought we would be inseparable. Now, they're all talking behind my back, or well, glaring behind my back hahaha. *Sighs* I miss being a loner lol.
» peanutmelon on 2011-06-23 11:52:54

yeah, i'm sure it would be nice to make out on a bed and such, but I'm scared if I do that, i'll end up doing more than planned. it just seems so easy to get caught up to a point that you don't even realize that your clothes are off xD

I'm in loner mode right now! It's nice to just relax, stay home and hang out with family. But i know soon enough, i'll want to hang out every weekend with my group lol.
» dannixfresh on 2011-06-24 12:05:37

This reminds me of something I saw on TV once, where a bunch of Christian teenagers promised to wait until marriage to have sex. I think most of them actually broke that promise not too long afterward, possibly even as a result of the "forbidden fruit" complex.

Unless you really get caught up with things to the point where you're not even conscious of what's going on, I wouldn't worry too much that you'll end up having sex accidentally. Decide what you're comfortable with, what you're not, what counts as sex for you, etc. If you get into a relationship, let the guy know your limits early on, and preferably the reasons behind them.

As long as you can find someone who has more self control than a small child or an animal, you probably don't have to worry about being alone in a room together. Chances are that if the guy wanted to do something, he would ask, and you could say no if you didn't want to do something. I don't think real life is like in movies, where the characters start making out and then just start ripping off their clothes while they slobber all over each other.

Probably all you have to watch out for is clothes being taken off. At least to me, that's where the temptation really starts. Making out, maybe even groping (ew) can be sort of sexual I guess, but as far as I'm aware, people can't have sex with their pants on and zipped up. Just sayin'.
» randomjunk on 2011-06-24 02:14:46

@randomjunk
yeah, no taking off of the clothing for me! lol
» dannixfresh on 2011-06-24 02:48:46

thanks ^.^ yeah I'm almost 400 lbs so at first weight is gonna pour off me like water if I actually work at it, (just because most is from cokes and junk food) once I get down under 300 it'll slow way down >.< and my bf said he would be angry if I went all aneorexic so gonna have to start making sure I eat everyday lol
» hiddenagenda on 2011-06-24 06:59:21

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