Home | Join! | Help | Browse | Forums | NuWorld | NWF | PoPo   
Visit GarageLand monkey
intoxication
Thursday. 9.22.05 9:26 am
no its not just the disturbed song im ironically listening to at the moment. it is my current state which is a good feeling. they say alcohol is a truth serum which i believe. massey was eyein up this broad and im seriously yelling at him to go talk to her. my truth is i want to see my battle happy which would involve nailin this broad to the wall. grant it, not his words, my words on the action i know he wants to do. so im yellin at him for him to get the internal courage to go talk to her and he doesnt. irrelevant to the point.

my main focus for the night, even in my drunken stupor was to watch after massey. which paid off on a few times. there was this douche, i forget his name, but he seemed like he was 15 and was really pissin me off. heres the deal, we go to a juicy bar (near prostitution as i like to call it) so im ready to leave as soon as we get there, but he holds the other 5 of us up by bein a douche. then we get to a cool, chill place where we can just sit and hang out and NOT push hookers off of us, and this prick is like "oooohhh this sucks, lets gooooooooo!!!1!" (yes reverting to the old 1 in the !!!! to prove the 15 year old mentality, very relevant in this case) and im like fuck dude, i just want to get out of the barricks, not pick up a whore.

and ive expressed my comfort with prostitution as a whole, its just not my gig. sorry. wait no im not fuck you. i dont want a prostitute: deal with it. if you do, fine, but go out on your own to get it. dont hold the other 5 of us down who want to get out and explore seoul. its my last nite here, you think i want to watch you fumble around trying to pick up a whore? oh ho ho you are quite mistaken.

listen, it might be superficial, or even pretentious, but my personal take is that i found a girl, gave her what she wanted, and she will be here soon to further reap those rewards. true or not, thats my mindset and i dont need to go and blow that, along with my pride and stubborness on a $20 whore. again, im not gonna knock you for doing it, but dont bring down 5 other people in the process. i finally said to him (yelled at him according to the others) that "fuck you. if you want to buy some sex, go the fuck ahead, we're going here to this bar" and now that i see it again in my head i was yelling, but he was being a dick. fuck him.

the funny thing is: when people get drunk, they do what they want. most of the guys were hittin on broads left and right. i put my headphones on, blasted them, and remembered good times in the last few months. like that first movie, she was rubbin her foot against me in the class A uniform, and i was so confused, then finding out was like the best feeling ever. im still not completely sure what love is, but when you get lost in your head and picture one person above EVERYTHING, i think its a good sign.

so fuck it. people may laugh at me, say it will never happen. fuck them. i still have hope. its my own personal something to fight for. everyone here needs something to fight for. otherwise they get miserable, like so many people ive seen here, and its actually quite depressing. fuck that. its quitting in my opinion. im gonna fuckin truck on knowing it will all be good. no matter what, my hard work, and devotion to a cause (and person) i believe in will pay off. fuck you if you say otherwise. we all earn what we get, be it negative and positive. so im stayin cool and keeping my stubborn ass ways for that which i love.

but seriously, you have to love seoul, $20 to buy a girl a drink and she'll bone you. damn being alone makes that hard to walk by, knowing you can do it and get away with it. one of our group did so but i will not say his name. he told ONLY me of the 5 because he trusted me. fuck you if you think ill give it up. the others were asking me, including my battle, massey, who i left early to make sure he was safe, and they'll get no satisfaction from me.

this is all part of why its good to be a stupid, stubborn taurus. if we believe in something we DO NOT give in. fuck you. i dont care if north koreans are shootin at me, i believe in the US and defending our allies so im gonna shoot back til im dead or their all done shooting. fuck you. hopefully it never comes to that but im too stubborn to see it otherwise. just like ill wait here for her, regardless of what else is thrown in front of me. fuck you. it like having that perfect peice of the puzzle and throwing it away for a quick fix. fuck that. thats for the weak. ill be damned if my stubborn ass wont stay true to what i believe is right.

oh and i know the religious people dont think my view of right is right but fuck them. their the first to fuckin twist reality and distort facts to justify their pussying out and not owning up to their weaknesses. i know my weakness, true courage and fortitute is overcoming them. yeah im hornier than, i dunno, something really horny, but fuck that. im not gonna give in. i fuckin refuse. ill wait. some things are worth waiting for. and i think she is. time will prove whether im right or wrong. and if im wrong ill feel like a complete fuckin idiot, but if not. ooooohhh nasties. the reward i would have rightfully earned is immeasurable. so ill take that risk. ill risk a while of heartache for a long time of heart fulfillment. risking a dollar for a million dollars isn't logical for me so i dont play the lottery. but this is. and fuck you, im too stubborn to deviate from it.

fuck you i wont change, ever. even if im wrong here, ill do it again later. better to be an idiot than a quitter. if my heart is set to something i WILL NOT quit, otherwise my heart is obviously not set to it. example: my heart is set to my family, if someone like in High Tension is trying to kill them, then either he or i would die that same night. no in between. my heart is set to them, so their safety is of the utmost importance. even above my own. fuck you. and if youd kill me with all the adrenaline and desire to survive, namely to protect my family, then fuckin credit to you for defeating alot comin at you. cause fuck all that shit. fuck sittin around at watchin. fuck not doin anything. fuck JUST calling for help. you call for backup in case you get caught up in the effort to overcome said attacking party.

listen if you love something, you will fight to the death and beyond to keep it or protect it. and thats for non-stubborn people. imagine me, i take it to an extreme beyond that. thats why i was told to go off and do my own thing. fuck that. i will still wait. im to stubborn to do anything that. i will always be here, waiting. ready to defend at any cost. fuck that shit.

ok im about to pass out now,
3 Comments.


wow...
» jenny (151.161.16.81) on 2005-09-22 01:28:50

Wait man! Have another beer!
But whatever you do, don't read my new entry. (This has been an un-paid avertisement brought to you in part, by yo mama)
» DeeVeuS on 2005-09-23 01:24:28

Bravo, fantasy))))
Certainly. So happens. cheap xenical Almost the same. clonazepam online I have not understood, what you mean? buy valium Your question how to regard? diazepam online It agree, very useful message cheap phentermine 66a4d4
» Jordan (222.124.213.118) on 2010-09-05 07:07:51

Name.

URL.

[to enter your email, use "mailto:[email protected]"]
Subject.

Comment.

Word verification.

Copy the first 4 characters only.

If you are a member, try logging in again or accessing this page here.

bcmst3000's Weblog Site • NuTang.com

NuTang is the first web site to implement PPGY Technology. This page was generated in 0.241seconds.

  Send to a friend on AIM | Set as Homepage | Bookmark Home | NuTang Collage | Terms of Service & Privacy Policy | Link to Us | Monthly Top 10s
All content � Copyright 2003-2047 NuTang.com and respective members. Contact us at NuTang[AT]gmail.com.