Wednesday. 1.31.07 12:37 pm
This week on “The White Rapper Show” our remaining gentry have apparently earned the right to contribute something musical to our great culture. The Magnificent Seven split into two teams and visit Justin Blaze at his Baseline Studios to make what Serch refers to as a “Club Banger.” I’d much more readily refer to it as Marion Barry smoke break soundtrack.
Yes. It was that bad on both sides; and in case you're wondering, we're still playing up to the stereotypes of black culture than training and assessing MCs.
While I have nothing against strip clubs, their employees or patrons (that's not a drink), when I think of skrippin club music en masse, I think of BET UnCut bullshit that’s primarily devoid of talent or effort. Only a handful do it properly even among seasoned skrip professionals. Why torture these poor white kids this way? If Nas can’t make a decent one, why should 100 Proof?
Serch telling someone their rhyme scheme is simplistic is like the pot calling T-Weed black. I know I wasn’t very old, but I do believe I remember Pete Nice scraping the floor with Serch on damn near every 3rd Bass track.
“When I say ‘Club Banger’ I mean a record that’s going to play in a club.” Are you fucking serious? That needs to be explained? I guess it does when you think “Club Banger” i.e. “Walk It Out” is synonymous with “Skrippin’ Music” i.e. “What That Thang Smell Like.”
Hearing the instrumental, Self-Hate… I mean, Jus Rhyme, really had a "Hustle & Flow" relapse on that shit! “How about ‘Beat that bitch? No? ummm… 'Stomp that ho?' Hmm…”
Ah, I remember the group of white pseudo-revolutionaries with Che Guevara t-shirts that "partied their way to social justice" back in college. One of them was a rapper too. They did nitrous in their rooms, scared the shit out of me, and failed to make any kind of sense regarding their plans for societal upheaval. Whenever I’d ask them what the plan was, they’d mumble something about a “Ghetto Revival,” do another line of coke and make their way to Starbucks.
While Powder is concerned with the mindstate of the white children he’s been poisoning with his message of self-hatred and the black children he’s been confusing with handfuls of U.N.-issue cheese and powdered milk, it’s quite refreshing to see Jon Boy stepping up and leading his team to puff-puff supremacy. I was impressed with dude in the challenge. For the first time ever I felt like his verse was clean.
Eh. Maybe that’s just my brain finally acclimating itself to the substandard level of talent I’ve been forced to follow for a few weeks now. I’m confused. I’m starting to see different sides to these kids. John Brown looks less and less like a shithead every week and I may not be the smartest nigga in the prison library, but I get the notion Persia is feeling this man.
“Okay, John. I’m sorry. You can get me back. Go ahead. Put your dick on my lips.”
On the other side of “Tha White House,” Sullee, Shamrock and 100 Proof are writing a singalong hook that is complete and utter suicide. I had to look away. I still feel ill just trying to recall Paul Wall, jr. wailing “tooooooo-niiiiiiiiiight.” I was however, thoroughly entertained by 100 Proof’s “Let’s swap body fluids!” exchange and the subsequent reactions.
Having completed a hard day of bullshitting themselves at Baseline, Serch invites new white supergroup La Coka Nostra over for pizza and Quaaludes. I love Everlast, but damn, all I can think about is how Eminem put 2 dicks in his blowhole a few years ago, so everything he said sounded like Charlie Brown’s teacher.
I never knew Ill Bill was capable of civilized, normal conversation. Responsible for my favorite putdown of all time (“Go eat a dick sandwich!”), Mr. Black Helicopters put some real game into these kids’ ears that Jus Rhyme really needed to be soaking up. Jokes aside, he and Everlast leading the white rapper support group proves to be the most pertinent and constructive portion of the series to date.
John Brown looking like somebody just tickled his balls with that Coka Nostra hoodie on! Hallelujah, holler back!
What better place to test out your freshly-made club banger than seedy Bronx skeet palace, Sin City with Kool Keith? If Laqueshia and Precious like it, then you’re in there.
Didn’t it just tug at your heartstrings to see Sullee carefully droppin them ones? Brother, you ain’t Young Hefner until you can at least drop some Pampers money in one sitting. A dancer ain't gonna bring her baby a pack of fuckin Fitti because you don't know how to behave yourself in a classy establishment!
By the time the song is over you done dropped 4 singles on the floor. A girl’s supposed to damn near break her neck on the pole for that? She can’t even go to Boston Market with 4 damn dollars, nigga. If you’re gonna go and indulge in that kind of entertainment, show some respect for the craft! Support your local skripper! We need a skripper union!
Watching Jus Rhyme lip sync his verse really made my week. That’s gotta be my next .gif file request. I need to have permanent evidence of Jus Rhyme trying to “Smack That” all on the floor. That and... well... the dildo on the lips thing.
As confusing and contradictory as this entire program is, one thing that became painfully clear by mid episode was that I was gonna lose another Final Four selection. Sink-pissin ass 100 Proof didn’t have any tricks in his Mohawk and joins G-Child in the realm of early 90s-era white rappers still better than MC Serch. Jon Boy and Jus Rhyme get to walk (with VH1 supervision) to the bodega for another week.
[email protected]
Let me find our Persia’s gonna be the new hook queen. You knew homegirl was holdin pipes.
Oh yeah... Talkin Videos 2006 Awards... First Installment... Tomorrow!
Posted by Ron Mexico at January 31, 2007 11:17 AM
Categories: muzik buzz [t], vh1 [t], white rapper show [t]
Talently... Cannot be
cheapest xanax I congratulate, the remarkable answer...
buy ultram Your inquiry I answer - not a problem.
xanax by mail You are right.
generic xanax bars Quite, yes
buy meridia online 21a67b
» Dustin (116.90.208.30) on 2011-06-08 12:17:37
Excellent variant Very valuable message
prozac drug Clearly, I thank for the information.
xenical online Clearly, I thank for the help in this question.
synthroid cost In my opinion, it is a lie.
buy ativan What good question
cheap tramadol 1a67bca
» Laverne (201.252.254.98) on 2011-07-08 08:32:58
If you are a member, try logging in again or accessing this page here.