Let Me Guide You

I was born in Dublin town where
There was not too much going on down for
Girls whose only hope was not to
Find a man who could piss in a pot so
Early I heard my first guitar and I
Knew I wanted to be a big star and I
Told my poor worried father said I
Ain't gonna go to school no more

Cuz see I wanna look cool and I wanna look good
With my hair slicked back and my black leather boots
Wanna stand up tall with my boobs upright
And feel real hot when the makeup's nice
Get sexy underneath them lights
Like I wanna fuck every man in sight
Baby come home with me tonight
Make you feel good make you feel all right

I'm going away to London
I got myself a big fat plan
I'm gonna be a singer in a rock 'n' roll band
I'm gonna change everything I can

Sorry to be disappointing
Wasn't born for no marrying
Wanna make my own living singing
Strong independent Pagan woman singing

And I feel real cool and I feel real good
Got my hair shaved off and my black thigh boots
I stand up tall with my pride upright
And I feel real hot when my makeup's nice
I get sexy underneath them lights
Like I wanna fuck every man in sight
Baby come home with me tonight
Make you feel good make you feel all right

I'm glad I came here to London
I've myself some big fat fun
And I have even made some mon'
I got the most angelic son
My baby daughter is golden
And I do what I like for fun
And I am happy in my prime
Daddy I'm fine
Daddy I'm fine
Daddy I'm fine
Daddy I'm fine
Daddy I love you

"Daddy I'm Fine"-- Sinead O'Connor, Faith and Courage

I tried to find you a Youtube video... but no dice.

Anyway, I feel like I have a similar conversation with my parents at least twice a week. No, I don't plan on running away to be a rockstar (I have no musical talent u_u), but I've been trying to convince them that I can handle myself since I was twelve.

The funny thing is, I find myself incapable of doing anything to overtly displease them. Sure, there's a lot of little things that I slip past them, but I've never made any life impacting decisions that they didn't want me to make. For instance, I wanted to get a tattoo down my spine for my eighteenth birthday, but they were against it. So, even though I'd been designing one for a year and a half, I still haven't gone through with it.

I didn't stay with the man I loved (who is now in Iraq, possibly dead), because I knew they didn't like him.

I'm not going to move off-campus next year, because I don't want them to stop supporting me.

How much longer am I going to put up with this? I feel awful selling myself short just so that I'll have security (financial and emotional), but I don't feel like I have a choice if I'm going to make it in this world. Why can't I just be like those crazy people who move half-way across the country with $75 and a dream?

I guess I just haven't found something important enough to leave my life behind for. What would do it for you?

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