A few words
"When we describe the Moon as dead, we are describing the deadness in ourselves. When we find space so hideously void, we are describing our own unbearable emptiness."
~ D.H. Lawrence
"Is the meaning of life defined by its duration? Or does life have a purpose so large that it doesn't have to be prolonged at any cost to preserve its meaning?"
"Living is not good, but living well. The wise man, therefore, lives as well as he should, not as long as he can... He will always think of life in terms of quality not quantity... Dying early or late is of no relevance, dying well or ill is... even if it is true that while there is life there is hope, life is not to be bought at any cost."
"People will tell you nothing matters, the whole world's about to end soon anyway. Those people are looking at life the wrong way. I mean, things don't need to last forever to be perfect."
~ Daydream Nation
"All Bette's stories have happy endings. That's because she knows where to stop. She's realized the real problem with stories-- if you keep them going long enough, they always end in death."
~ The Sandman: Preludes & Nocturnes
"The road now stretched across open country, and it occurred to me - not by way of protest, not as a symbol, or anything like that, but merely as a novel experience - that since I had disregarded all laws of humanity, I might as well disregard the rules of traffic. So I crossed to the left side of the highway and checked the feeling, and the feeling was good. It was a pleasant diaphragmal melting, with elements of diffused tactility, all this enhanced by the thought that nothing could be nearer to the elimination of basic physical laws than deliberately driving on the wrong site of the road."
~ Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita
"It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend."
~ William Blake
Kill that boredom!
Binder Paper Comics
Web Comics and Such
A Distant Soil (Some nudity)
The Adventures of Gyno-Star (Some explicit stuff)
Blue Milk Special
Cigarro & Cerveja
Cyanide and Happiness
dead winter (has some explicit stuff)
Devilbear: The Grimoires of Bearalzebub (PG-13?)
Eat That Toast!
The Fancy Adventures of Jack Cannon
For Lack of a Better Comic
Girls with Slingshots (some explicit stuff...?)
The Intrepid Girlbot
The Last Halloween
Last Train to Old Town
The League of Evil Genius
Legend of Bill
Living With Insanity (some nudity)
Love Me Nice
Married to the Sea
The Moon Prince
Moth (Some nudity)
The Non-Adventures of Wonderella
Political Cartoonists Index
Poorly Drawn Lines
The Property of Hate
Robbie and Bobby
Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal
Scenes from a Multiverse
The Secret Knots
Stand Still. Stay Silent
Strong Female Protagonist
The Super Fogeys
Tales of Pylea
Three Word Phrase (some nudity)
Tiny Kitten Teeth
Toothpaste for Dinner
Trying Human (Some nudity)
Two Guys and Guy
Yellow Peril (PG-13)
Infrequently/No Longer Updating Web Comics
The Abominable Charles Christopher
The Adventures of Dr. McNinja
The Adventures of Ellie Connelly
Bag of Toast
Bear in Mind
The Book of Biff
Chain Bear (Some explicit stuff)
Daisy is Dead
Ectopiary (Some nudity)
Edmund Finney's Quest to Find the Meaning of Life
A Fine Example
Finn and Charlie are HITCHED
Hark! A Vagrant
Head Doctor Productions
Hello with Cheese
Kyle & Atticus
Lesbian Pirates from Outer Space
Letters to a Wild Boar
Lovecraft is Missing
Meat and Plastic
The Nerds of Paradise
No Reason Comics
One Swoop Fell
Pictures for Sad Children
A Redtail's Dream
Roy's Boys (PG 13?)
Run Freak Run
The Super Gay Adventures of Ross Boston
YU + ME
Pure Flash Awesomeness
Die Anstalt : Toy Psychiatry
Clients from Hell
Creatures in My Head
Damn You Auto Correct!
Jhonen Vasquez's site
Overheard in New York
Passive Aggressive Notes
Well, I'm at the quarter century mark now
Tuesday, September 20, 2016
I guess I don't really feel any different now, being 25. My birthday pretty much just felt like another day, it didn't stand out too much. Fro wished me a happy birthday on Facebook I guess, and my mom called me to say it too, but I didn't really celebrate. I miss my friends and wish I could have done something with them.
On the bright side, last night I think I made a friend from my new cohort? We talked a bit after our orientation, and she invited my boyfriend and I to go to a cupcake place with her and hang out a little. She's rather loquacious, but she's very nice, and I like her. When she asked how old I was, I said "Twenty... five... tomorrow," and she said it was a bit of a short notice to bake a cake (she likes to cook), but maybe she'd make something another time. I thought it was really sweet of her. She also said she'd like to throw some dinner parties at her apartment, which sounds like fun, and I'm looking forward to that.
For my birthday... well, we didn't do too much. Checked out a pizza place nearby (and got a slice of peach habanero pizza, which was actually pretty good) with my boyfriend, but mostly stayed in otherwise. We talked about some serious things in the morning, and I was... a bit agitated by some of them, but I felt better later on. I think I was dehydrated today though, because we went to the bookstore so I could get some stuff I need for class, and I felt really off-balance and kind of like I was going to faint while we were there. :S Also checked out the fitness center at school and got a salad to take back to my place...
I felt like it was important to get out of the apartment and walk around, but I wasn't really in much of a mood to do anything outside, so we ended up watching Tetsuo: The Iron Man inside. Probably should have shown him Tetsuo: The Bullet Man instead, as I feel it's a little more accessible, but oh well. We also tried watching Sausage Party briefly, but it was so awful that we stopped it maybe... twenty minutes in? We talked about more Serious Things after that, but somehow transitioned to joking around and laughing about stuff, which lightened the mood a lot. We were kind of mocking New Age pseudoscience-y stuff, and it was a pretty silly conversation. Boyfriend laughed really hard at "free range broccoli" and when I said something about "chlorophyll is just something scientists made up to make us feel separate from plants, but really, the same blood runs through all our veins." It was nice to laugh like that, especially after how I felt earlier in the day.
Oh, and I got a message from a former friend... so we'll see how that goes.
Getting the hang of things here
Monday, September 19, 2016
My achievement for the day thus far has been setting up my laptop as a virtual router so that I can have wifi in my place. It wasn't a difficult process, but it just wasn't working before, and now it is, for reasons I do not know. I was able to get online with my tablet, and my boyfriend connected his phone too. ^_^
I'm still settling in here, but I think I'm getting the hang of things more. I had my first on-campus meal yesterday, and it was pretty good. Just enjoying spending lots of time with my boyfriend right now before he starts work and I start school in a couple days.
We have been finding a lot of interesting little parks around here.
My food yesterday! It was super satisfying. o.o
We walked around campus at night yesterday, looking at the gardens, and found this.
And I took a picture of a pretty flower using flash, but partially covered the flash with my hand, and it came out looking like this.
My birthday is tomorrow... I'm gonna be 25. I'm a little bit sad that I won't get to celebrate it with my friends, but I guess I can at least Skype with Becka and Fro (and maybe Vicky) on Friday. And my boyfriend will be here with me, that's not insignificant. He said he already knew what he wanted to get me as a present, but he has to wait for his first paycheck to come in before he can get it. :0
Yesterday he said he hopes we're still together forty years from now... I feel the same way. I know we've been together a relatively short time, but I really feel like we could spend our lives together. It almost seems like it would be unnatural not to.
Moved in [2P]
Friday, September 16, 2016
Close to departing
Sunday, September 11, 2016
Well, it's my last night here for awhile. I kind of just shoved a bunch of stuff into my luggage haphazardly, so hopefully I didn't forget anything important. Packing made me much more aware of just how many clothes I have. >.>
I hung out with Fro, Becka, and Vicky today for a couple hours. We're planning to try doing a group Skype call once a week to stay in touch. I really hope it works out. I don't want to lose my friendship with any of them. Even though I'm sure I'll make new friends in my new cohort in grad school, they aren't going to replace my existing friends. Plus, I told Fro she could be one of my bridesmaids if/when I got married, so I need to stay in contact for that reason. :P
It's strange to be moving and to feel so little about it, even though it seems like such a big change in many ways. I feel like I'd normally be much more worried about it. Fro said that my recent lack of strong emotions could be related to anxiety/stress, and that she sometimes gets that kind of emotional cutoff when faced with a big change. Maybe she's right, I dunno. This time is different than when I moved to New York to go to St. John's in 2009. I was a lot more alone then. Now I have my boyfriend, and things seem a lot less scary with him around.
B Dubs Twenty
Thursday, September 8, 2016
I'm listening to a lullaby version of "The Real Slim Shady" by Eminem right now. It's uh... interesting? There are apparently tons of albums worth of these lullaby renditions of popular songs, so I'm exploring some of those at the moment.
My boyfriend was lying on my bed, playing Twenty. He just managed to get to 20, but he's not very good at multitasking, so it required extensive pause usage to get there. It was fun to see him play it, though. :P It's been awhile since I introduced someone to the game.
I had kind of a casual going away party last night, which was nice, although I felt super exhausted afterwards. I've been feeling pretty tired lately and I don't really know why. I guess I feel somewhat more awake right now, but it took pretty much the whole day to feel that way. We're going to watch a movie now, so hopefully I'll be able to stay awake for that.
Recap of the past few days [2P]
Tuesday, August 30, 2016
Friday, August 26, 2016
Year in review
Thursday, August 25, 2016
It seems like so much has changed in the past year.
I was hitting the gym like crazy for awhile, but that's slowed down now. A lot of the classes I was taking regularly got removed from the schedule, and a number of the gym instructors left, so that kinda messed up my routine. :T
Got into a car accident that gave me severe anxiety over being in cars for awhile. Even though I'm pretty much past the anxiety now, I do still get tiny fears that I'll lose control of the vehicle when I'm driving. That really spices up your commute, lemme tell ya. My perspective on the stability of my security and safety has been affected by that, but overall I think things are okay.
I feel... pretty much over my breakup from a year ago (it's been a year ago today, actually). It took a long time (felt like forever, honestly) to move past all the resentment and bitterness, and I think there's still some hurt left over, but things feel better. The car accident helped shock it out of my system, I'm pretty sure.
Lost (maybe that's not the right word, though) a friendship back in... October, back when I was still dealing with a lot of negative feelings and stress about the breakup. I didn't really write about it here, but it was an... ordeal... that lasted for a few months even after I stopped responding to the other person. I just didn't feel like I was in a place to handle it well at the time, because I didn't have the emotional resources to talk to that person the way they wanted. It was super draining and too much for me at the time. I wish things had worked out better than they did, because I don't hate that person, but I think it wasn't healthy for either of us at the time to keep going with it. I'm not sure if we'll ever be friends again in the future. I wouldn't be opposed to it at all, but from the little I know, it seems like the person might be moving on with their life, and I don't want to interfere with that or their potential growth.
Annnnnd of course, I made a new friend. I may have mentioned him a few times here. :P I think he is, without a doubt, the best thing to happen to me this year. He's coming to see me tomorrow, and then we're going to spend a few days hanging out with my friends and going to Burning Man.
In a few weeks, we're driving up to move me into my new apartment, and the next two years of my life are gonna start. I have no way of knowing how things will go, but I feel pretty optimistic, and I have some wonderful, loving people in my life who make me feel hopeful about the future. :)
The lyrics of this song have no relevance to anything in my life currently, but her voice is so beautiful and it gives me chills.
"Concrete Wall" by Zee Avi.
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