Ok. I am being called stupid again for being a strong independent feminist. I have been told again to make use of my femininity to make others do my bidding. This newly made friend gave me a situation where if a girl is seen a little weak... guys will swoon over to help. And guys see strong female like me they don't give a damn in helping me.

This is not ok. Being feminist or not, is there anything wrong with being too independent? I am just being myself! It's not like I don't ask for help when I needed one. It's just the people in my my surrounding just don't want to help! And that's lead me to becoming strong female! For god sake, it's because of my environment I am like this and some guys are blaming me for becoming like that. So what the hell do you want me to do? Go crying at work? And then people will say I am not resilient at work. What is really going on?!

Seduction, again, I am told is a useful skill which I need to master. Alright. I shall try seducing a cat.

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Right, food!!!!

And hell, I got severe food poisoning on the weekend. Vomited and diarrhea within a few hours apart left me so weak until today.

Tracing back, it could be the raw salmon I ate in a salad, the free hot chocolate drink I had from Starbuck, the hot chocolate I had during my Instagramming, the Green Curry Noodle, the supplements which I always have healing crisis.

And I got no idea which is the culprit. But medical doctor and my friends pinpointed the raw salmon. My sister said we should not be eating raw food anymore due to the heavy sea pollution. My mum blamed on the health supplements that I ate. Oh well, I don't want to talk about the latter. She blames everything on things that are neither positive or negative in life.

Anyways, despite that, I attended a talk and watched a HK blockbuster movie on Sunday. It was such a ME-TIME that I needed to air myself and head. You know what? I even thought of watching another movie right after I came out from the cinema room! But I didn't. Because I know I was exhausted in a way even though I didn't feel it. That was true because I felt weak the following day.

Oh well, no more raw fish for now!

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I copied this affirmation a long time ago. Have fun trying.

"Universe, send me $100 within 7 days as a sign I'm ready to multiply my levels of prosperity.

Thank you for the 100. I am grateful beyond words."

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I was reminiscing about some guy I was really crazy about many years ago. We had a relationship for a short while but funnily I never felt it was a relationship at all. It felt nothing to me now. Though I was devastated when he replied me mean words during the separation, I now feel so relieved that I had dumped him. I followed a whim on dumping and I never felt so grateful for following my instincts.

Oh well, that's because I can do whatever and go wherever I want now. I spend the money on myself. I think what I appreciate the most is I can do whatever shit I want now without thinking whether my partner would like it or not, whether I need to ask his permission or not. The thing was I didn't even give a shit about that when we were together. He did mentioned before that I liked to visit him whenever it was convenient for me but not for him. The thing was he kept on saying 'anytime, baby'. Bwahaha. I am alpha. Go me!

So now I totally appreciate my freedom and no intention of being in a relationship. Whatever thoughts you have running in your mind after reading this post, I suggest you keep to yourself and be happy for others. =)

Cheers to our own endeavours.

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I read an article today stating that competent people bring upon themselves extra work because firstly they are so capable in getting things done that superior will just rely on them and secondly they tend to say yes to all jobs. So in the end, they 'choose' to be busy.

That sounds exactly like me. Superior then tend to have higher expectation on these competent people. Therefore, if they didn't perform well due to overload he or she somewhat will be criticised for the tardiness.

I don't want to talk about my work situation but I grow tired already.

So the article indirectly says being incompetent is actually a happier person. Why not? Why do more when the pay stays the same as the competent person who covers so many areas? That's me: doing 2 persons full-time job on a part-time basis. And yet the other full-timers said they are overloaded with work. If I can do it, why not you all too? That says a lot. But I want more pay instead.

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I now remember why I was so crazy about a Hong Kong movie called the Duel. I was so crazy about Andy Lau's cool character. It's like he was the coolest guy (based on a movie) in 2000. Just look at him in the picture



So cool, right? And in the movie, he was a fabulous fighter. He moved so fluidly. Well, which girl doesn't fall for a bad guy?

Ugh. Andy Lau is good looking. I can't deny that.

Aarif Rahman is also handsome. Ahhh....

I think I can have a harem of handsome guys.

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