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So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

The Profile

Age. 37
Gender. Female
Ethnicity. that of my father and his father before him
Location Altadena, CA
School. Other
» More info.
The World

The Link To Zanzibar's Past
This is my page in the beloved art community that my sister got me into:


Extra points for people who know what Samarinda is.
The Phases of the Moon Module
Croc Hunter/Combat Wombat
My hero(s)
Only My Favorite Baseball Player EVER

Aw, Larry Walker, how I loved thee.
The Schedule
M: Science and Exploration
T: Cook a nice dinner
Th: Parties, movies, dinners
F: Picnics, the Louvre
S: Read books, go for walks, PARKOUR
Su: Philosophy, Religion
The Reading List
This list starts Summer 2006
A Crocodile on the Sandbank
Looking Backwards
Wild Swans
Tales of the Alhambra (in progress)
Dark Lord of Derkholm
Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?
The Lost Years of Merlin
Harry Potter a l'ecole des sorciers (in progress)
Atlas Shrugged (in progress)
A Long Way Gone (story of a boy soldier in Sierra Leone- met the author! w00t!)
The Eye of the World: Book One of the Wheel of Time
From Magma to Tephra (in progress)
Lady Chatterley's Lover
Harry Potter 7
The No. 1 Lady's Detective Agency
Introduction to Planetary Volcanism
A Child Called "It"
Is Multi-Culturalism Bad for Women?
Americans in Southeast Asia: Roots of Commitment (in progress)
What's So Great About Christianity?
Aeolian Geomorphology
Aeolian Dust and Dust Deposits
The City of Ember
The People of Sparks
Cube Route
When I was in Cuba, I was a German Shepard
The Golden Compass
Clan of the Cave Bear
The 9/11 Commission Report (2nd time through, graphic novel format this time, ip)
The Incredible Shrinking Man
New Moon
Breaking Dawn
Armageddon's Children
The Elves of Cintra
The Gypsy Morph
Animorphs #23: The Pretender
Animorphs #25: The Extreme
Animorphs #26: The Attack
Crucial Conversations
A Journey to the Center of the Earth
A Great and Terrible Beauty
The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian
Dandelion Wine
To Sir, With Love
London Calling
Watership Down
The Invisible
Alice in Wonderland
Through the Looking Glass
20,000 Leagues Under the Sea
The Host
The Hunger Games
Catching Fire
Shadows and Strongholds
The Jungle Book
Beatrice and Virgil
The Help
Zion Andrews
The Unit
Quantum Brain
The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks
No One Ever Told Us We Were Defeated
Memento Nora
The Name of the Wind
The Terror
Tao Te Ching
What Paul Meant
Lao Tzu and Taoism
Libyan Sands
Sand and Sandstones
Lost Christianites: The Battles for Scripture and the Faiths We Never Knew
The Science of God
Calculating God
Great Contemporaries, by Winston Churchill
City of Bones
Around the World in 80 Days, by Jules Verne
Stranger in a Strange Land
The Old Man and the Sea
Flowers for Algernon
Au Bonheur des Ogres
The Martian
The Road to Serfdom
De La Terre � la Lune (ip)
In the Light of What We Know
Devil in the White City
The First Fifteen Lives of Harry August
Red Mars
How to Be a Good Wife
A Mote in God's Eye
A Gentleman in Russia
The Fatal Conceit: The Errors of Socialism
Seneca: Letters from a Stoic
The Juanes Module

Juanes just needed his own mod. Who can disagree.
Ouais (Canadienne)
Thursday. 7.1.04 11:48 pm
Je veux ecrire en francais, mais je ne peux pas parler le francais tres bien, et je n'ai pas des accents. Quelle dommage. euh, behn. Aujourd'hui j'avais une terrible, mauvaise jour. Tout un coup, la jour est devenue marveilleuse. Pourquoi? Je ne sais pas exactement, mais j'ai voulu utiliser la passe compose et l'imparfait, alors j'ai construit la phrase comme ca, avec "tout un coup" pour signaliser (pas un mot?) une action dans la passe.
Hier j'ai trouve un histoire que j'avais ecrit il y a longtemps. J'ai su beacoup plus francais que maintenant.
Ah, la nuit! Je veux ouvre la fenetre et entendre le vent qui court libre et les feuilles de l'arbre dogwood qui chuchote a les etoiles..........

Je vais dormir maintenant parce-que je suis fatigue. Et finissons-nous avec un des phrase que j'aime plus:

"C'etait un coup de foudre!"

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Yes, I can lick my elbow
Wednesday. 6.30.04 11:10 pm
Steller Goddess
You are Ji Nu!

Poor Gary is sick. Hopefully he will not die. I like to worry about him and listen to his symptoms and tell him that I think he has a tapeworm. He said he wouldn't mind that so much because he could lose some weight and be skinny.

"That is physically impossible and you can believe it because that comes straight from Calculus 4. I may be a thug but I'm a fucking smart-ass thug."

Type Your Name With Your:
nose: laura
elbow: laura
tongue: laura
chin: laura
feet: laura
eyes closed and one finger: lsirs
back of my hand: laura
palm: laura
wrist: olqauura
Stolen from Einahpets_Ellehcim

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Important Questions Raised
Wednesday. 6.30.04 9:41 pm
End of War on Sauron raises more questions about its conduct and

New Gondor Times
Grima Wormtongue

While the leaders of the alliance including Gandalf and
Aragorn have proclaimed a victory in the War on Sauron questions are
increasingly being raised about both the conduct of the war and its

Archeologists and historians have particularly bemoaned the
loss of priceless artifacts forever lost with the fall of Barad-dur,
when Sauron's fortress was destroyed. These artifacts reputed to date
back to the First Age have caused some in the archeological community
to condemn what they call the careless and thoughtless way the assault
on Mordor was handled.

Meanwhile months after the fall of Barad-Dur, the Alliance has
failed to capture either Sauron or the Ringwraiths. While the Captains
of the West claim that Sauron and all his works have perished, no body
has ever been found and there are reports that Sauron may be wandering
on the outskirts of Mirkwood in various disguises. This adds yet
another question to the many questions already being raised about the
conduct of the War on Sauron.

Military experts had already condemned the march to the Towers
of the Black Gate as a foolhardy maneuver conducted with too few
troops and point to the heavy casualties incurred during the sieges of
Helm's Gate and Gondor as evidence of the incompetence with which the
War on Sauron was handled.

Various questions have also been raised as to whether the War
on Sauron was even necessary in the first place.

"After Sauron's defeat at the hands of the Last Alliance he
was in no shape to mount any kind of assault on the West. His
fortresses were in ruins, his armies were demoralized and the only
thing he wanted was to recover a small piece of property, a trifle
that was looted from him by Allied troops during the former war," The
Wizard Saruman had argued, "A mere ring. If it had only been turned
over to him, this entire conflict could be avoided."

While Gandalf and others have argued that the so-called "One
Ring" would have singlehandedly allowed Sauron to crush the West,
other experts have questioned whether any ring could indeed have such
capabilities and suggested that the Ring was never actually recovered
after it had been lost by Isildur but that the leaders of the Alliance
had deceived the Peoples of the West into believing that Sauron was on
the verge of gaining possession of it in order to trigger a war with
Mordor. Alliance leaders have responded indignantly to such
accusations but nevertheless no real evidence bas been presented that
the One Ring even existed outside of the claims of a handful of
insiders at the Council of Elrond. Gandalf's insistence that the One
Ring has now been destroyed in the fires of Mount Doom has done little
to boost his credibility with a story that to many far too
conveniently disposes of the evidence before any objective parties
have had a chance to examine it.

"We kept hearing all the time about Sauron using this supposed
ring to enslave the free peoples of Middle Earth and now it turns out
that Sauron never even had this ring to begin with," Political
activist Bill Fenry said, "I feel deceived and lied to."

Many of those who had voiced opposition to war and pushed for
a peaceful settlement with Sauron have also questioned whether
diplomacy could have been used to avert a terrible conflict citing
frequent emmisaries from Mordor that were turned away by Rohan and
Gondor causing some to speculate on the motives of the Alliance
leadership in wanting to bring about an unnecessary war.

Mithril has been cited as one economic reason driving the
conflict with anti-war activists citing the assassination of Smaug and
the rebuffed Dwarven colonization of Moria combined with the sudden
appearance of Dwarves at the Council of Elrond as evidence of a
conspiracy aimed at allowing Dwarven interests to take control of
Mithril mines in the possession of Sauron leading to the slogan, 'No
Blood for Mithril.'

Others point to the widespread hostility towards Gondor and
the Western Lands, and particularly towards King Elessar and his
policies as proof that the War on Sauron has failed.

"Yes we may have defeated Sauron but now the Haradrim, the
Southrons, the Easterlings and the Orcs and Goblins hate us,"
Political analyst Shelob said, "And what point is there in defeating a
single Sauron when our foreign policy causes us to be so hated that a
thousand more Saurons will rise in his place."

Particularly worrying to Shelob are polls that show that Orc
hatred of humans is at an all time high with over 90 percent of Orcs
expressing a desire to devour human flesh.

"We can't hope to defeat the Orcs with weapons. We must
understand why they hate us and what we can do to stop them from
hating us and wanting to eat our flesh. For example virtually every
Orc surveyed has expressed dissatisfaction with Gondor's foreign
policy of killing Orcs and overthrowing Sauron. Those are statistics
we need to really pay attention to."

One thing is certainly clear that with Sauron possibly still
on the loose, many people questioning whether the existence of the One
Ring wasn't a fraud meant to create support for an unjust war, the
loss of valuable archeological treasures at Barad-Dur, exposure of
military blunders by the alliance and continuing raids by Orcs and
Goblins; whether or not the so-called War on Sauron has ended in
victory or defeat remains in question.

(Lifted from [email protected] (O Deus) on r.a.s.f.f.) Props to Justin Bristow. ;)

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Leaving Forever
Monday. 6.28.04 1:37 am
These days, it's kind of hard to leave someone and say, "Well, looks like I'll never, ever EVER see you again. Have a nice life."

I mean, it's not like you can just go to the harbor and get on a boat and sail into the sunset across the sea to the land that never dies or something like that.
You'd be like, "hey, I'm leaving on this ship for the other side of the world." and your pal Samwise would be like, "hey, shoot me an IM when you get there, k?" and you'd say, "k", and it'd be like you were never really apart. Sam's life would still be split because he'd spend half of his time on IM being like, "i miss u! :p" and his wife would say, "get your fat hobbit arse off that swiveling office chair and help me with these fat children of yours."
Now it doesn't mean that you will in fact never see that person again, but no one says that anymore. They're like, "hey, see you again some day soon" and some day soon translates to never or "I'll write you an email" and then the email just never gets written and it's kind of sad because if you had only known that "I'll write you an email" was a total crock then you might have spent just a little more time saying goodbye and meant it a little more when you said that you'd miss each other and maybe said somethings that you'd always meant to say.
But no one likes to believe that forever is real when it comes to goodbye. Maybe we could even say, "Well, it's incredibly unlikely that I will ever see you again, my friend. You meant a great deal to me in the limited time we had together. I will think of you often." And a hug, to seal the finality. Case closed.
No "I'll write you from Istanbul" or "I'll come to Zimbabwe one of these days and we can have lunch."
Maybe everyone really does mean it at the time and then events and circumstance prevent them from ever reuniting. I guess in that case it's not so bad.
I liked the way this senior from my Adventure Class put it,

"Hey Laura,
We always wanted to do the Bolsen's Loops again, didn't we? Too bad.
I hope I see you again someday, down the road."

That's kind of like a goodbye forever, but it also incorporates a nice "it would be a lark to see you again". I think it's the "hope" and the "down the road" that I like best. I actually did see him one day, down the road, but I wasn't sure he'd remember me so I didn't even say hello. Now isn't that a shame?

the Inconsolable Range

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More warehouse madness~!
Saturday. 6.26.04 12:17 am
Warehouse Quotes:

"See, I don't need a radio, I just always need to be standing next to you when they call me."


Gary: Could you take care of that? I'm going to go get drunk. Eat dinner, start drinking.
Me: Sounds like a good Friday night!
Gary: Well, you know... or maybe you don't know. or maybe you do know.

"Boy, do I love a woman in overalls. Is that sexist?"
--Kreepy, kreepy Ken

"This is the Aurora tornado-warning system. Please take shelter immediately."

--The Aurora outdoor tornado warning system, which I didn't even know existed

"I think Rusty should start keeping paper in his backyard. He could put a tarp over it, have a little track that goes through by the fence, keep a clamp truck on his patio."
--Marka Stewart

Caesar: Do you have a boyfriend?
Me: How do I say, 'I have too much work'"
Caesar: 'Yo tengo mucho novios'

Address that was making me soo hungry:
Hershey Chocolate USA
19 East Chocolate Avenue
Hershey, PA 17033

This address was making me very suspicious...

CONTACT TONY 479-636-1804


::she-who-must-not-be-named, pouring blue packing popcorn into a box::: I'm an alien! I'm laying eggs! WheeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeee!

I decided that I looove the tool shed. I don't know whether it's the lawn mower or the tools or the spray paint, but something in there smells mighty good. I would put it on my 47 best places to make-out in the warehouse list, if I had one. Which I don't even though if I did it would already have two places on it. Three.

This work stuff has to stop, I'm losing my mind!

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Inside, I am a burly man. ...a burly gay man
Friday. 6.25.04 9:16 am
What I apparently look like to truckers --->

What I actually look like --->

Note to truckers everywhere:

No, I do not need any help. Do you have a ticket?

Because there is about to be a gun show.

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The Great Dentist in the Sky
Thursday. 6.24.04 8:45 am
I always thought of Judgment Day as being kind of like a trial, and you'd stand up and the evidence for and against you would be read, and then you'd hear your eternal sentence. Yesterday I changed my mind. I was in the dentist's office, listening to "positive and encouraging k-lov" (the christian station) which they were playing on the office radio, and I realized that in my present position it was impossible for me to be positive or encouraged... but I was praying. I think Judgment Day would be like the Great Final Dental Cleaning, and Jesus would get in there first and ask you questions that you couldn't quite answer because your mouth would be full of Heavenly Dental Tools and smile and asked you if you flossed, and you'd remember that one time back in the day when you flossed or went to church or believed in God or thought about it for a minute and you answer would be, "sort of". Jesus would do you the favor of clearing up all the little stuff, that time you took the Lord's name in vain yesterday or when your mother-in-law was late and you hoped she had driven into a ditch. Jesus could make that look like it never happened with a flick of his cleaning instrument, especially if you used anti-cavity toothpaste or apologized for the fact that you came here straight from work and you hadn't had a chance to brush your teeth and looked like you were really sorry. He'd say each sin as he removed it and wipe it away on your paper bib for all the office to see. Then the real exam would begin, and God would come in tugging on His gloves, and you'd exchange pleasantries until God would say, "Let's see what We have here." and He'd lean you back even further in your chair and He'd pull down the Great White Light and you'd hear K-LOV in the background singing his praises in the modern Light Rock and he'd flick down his God Glasses which made Him look like a spider and allowed Him to See Everything. He'd comment on your past dental work- maybe early in your life you didn't brush so well and you had lots of cavities, but depending on how repentant you were and how could your last dentist was, most of those were all patched up and you were forgiven. He would poke your tender gums to see how easily they bleed, he would poke between your teeth to see how deep your pockets were, he would gently remind you that through a regular program of praying and going to church a lot of this damage could have been avoided. He'd drive his instrument into each of your teeth looking for cavities... and he'd probably find them. Your teeth had been hurting and you didn't want to go to the dentist before because you'd rather ignore the problem then go through the painful ordeal of finding out how extensive it was and fixing it. He'd analyze your deeper sins, the ones that couldn't be removed easily. He'd announce them in an analytical voice to all of Humankind and to Jesus, who had been willing to overlook or not trained enough to see them. He'd say, "There's a betrayal on number 9... and a lot of hypocrisy here in the back..." He'd dig His instrument into your sins and chuckle a little as he asked if it tickled, when in actuality it hurt more than anything you had ever felt. He'd blast you with water and air and you'd hold back tears and try to tell him that your teeth were sensitive. But He already knew that- He knows Everything- but sometimes the revealation of things you've so long ignored is painful. Jesus would spare you the pain. He needed to dig right to the root of the problem. He'd tell you that if your insurance had covered it (and it would if you were Catholic) your parents could have bought you a sealent or indulgence or told you to do good works and this could have been prevented. You wonder in the back of your mind if He's just saying you have a cavity so that He would have been right about wanting you to buy the sealent. Finally, he'd sum up your dental exam and leave you to Jesus to wash the blood from your gums and wipe it all over the bib that you thought they put there to protect you. He'd leave you with a comment like, "My, you have an unusual amount of saliva" which you wouldn't know if it was a compliment or an insult, so you'd say nothing. Then God would turn you to the Right side or the Left, and the Left would mean Heaven because God is most certainly Left-handed, despite what they say. The Left would be the equivalent of "We'll see you again in six months" and the Right would be the equivalent of "We'll have to get you in next week for a root canal/drilling/tooth extraction/crown fitting" And that, my friends, would be Hell.

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Music and Potatoes
Sunday. 6.20.04 11:17 pm

Someday I shall play the flamenco guitar. And I shall strap the guitar I made for myself (or the guitar makers of my village made it, perhaps, as a gift) to my back and I shall climb to the top of a building and pick out the sad and haunting notes that will ring through the square and remind all that hear them of my loss and tortured past.

Well, maybe I can do without the loss and tortured past part, but the notes will sound like that anyway.
That will be when I am still young and filled with the pain of youthful passion.

When I get older, I'll pick up the harmonica and I'll sit out on the porch while my grandchildren are catching fireflies and I'll play the Blues. I'll have such rhythm and soul that the night will absorb my echos and weep in great blue-gray curtains upon the distant plain.

Hmm. I know the bagpipe figures into this somehow too, but I can't decide where. Maybe they'll play it at my funeral, and the sound will find and fill every corner of the land, and buoy my spirit as it radiates outward. It will be a long time before the memory of it dies.

In other news:
Today I was looking for gravy and I picked up butterscotch sauce. Kind of made me wonder what mashed potatoes and butterscotch sauce would taste like. Sounds gross at first... but would it be?

think about it.

watching: Dragonheart, Streetfighter
listening to: the tango from True Lies, Por Una Cabeza
mood: itchy

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