"Such is life," she says nonchalantly, as though it explains everything.

Like that bloody colloquialism makes everything alright.



It doesn't.



BUT!! Time does.

Love of my life: my soul mate: my best friend:

who am I to say what the future holds?

All I can do is what I do, and all I want from you is ..

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I hung out with Michelle and Bruce today at (GAG) Starbucks. (It wasn't my idea, I promise.)

I was not a fan of Bruce in High School.. partially 'cause I did not know him that well, and partially because he broke the heart of JoAnna, a girl I went out with a few times my senior year and grew semi-close to. Bruce joined the Marines after High School and came walking in like Chuck Norris :

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" She keeps asking me if I'm alright, like I'm some little girl---" My voice trails off as I look to my kid sister in the passenger's seat of my car. She wasn't listening. Which may be for the best.

Caitlin does keep asking me if I'm alright, though. Of course I'm alright.




imnotalright.

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" I hate you," I tell Anh. My arms are crossed over my chest and I'm slumping down in the passenger's seat of her car. She's driving somewhere.. probably the mall.. probably to Bethany's Boba Tea Shop.. I forget.

The woman smiles to herself before turning her head in my direction. " I hate you more. "

So there I am, crossing my arms over my chest one moment, and the next I've got a hand outstretched in front of her, blocking her vision with my fully extended index finger. She eventually gives up on trying to look over my hand and looks to me incredulously.

I extended, then retracted the index digit before speaking up.

"I'm just stretching my finger," I tell her. She confesses her hatred for me yet again before laughing out loud.. and she keeps driving.

The relationship we got( I know that's bad grammar. I'm in a " got " sort'a'mood. ) is .. perplexing. The one thing I know for sure about it is that I love her and outside of spending quality time with my family (especially the big and little sisters ), there wouldn't be much for me in my home town to come home to.

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i'd update right now but i don't want you

i stopped at you.


I was going to say that I did not want you to think that it was a special update because of

I stopped at of.

It's a special entry. Not a good special.

A confused special.

An I can't sleep because of what just happend special.

An I lied to you when I said I was

A special where I can't complete a lot of my sentences because




P.S.
(( the mun bubbles were off because it was OOC. ))

P.P.S
bah, humbug.

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... Yeah.

Go here to not be bored

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[23:46] Yet Another Sign: happy new year
[23:46] Yet Another Sign: wow
[23:46] Yet Another Sign: i was talking to YOU at the turn of the year?
[23:46] David: happy new year
[23:46] Yet Another Sign: of all the people in all the world
[23:46] Yet Another Sign: you?
[23:47] David: congratulations
[23:47] David: you have sunken to a new low
[23:47] Yet Another Sign: yeah
[23:47] David: which means.. things can only go up for you this year

So true, Dave.. so true.

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Do you ever look back at how we used to be? Do you ever think about you - and - me? Lately you're all that I'm thinkin' off.. I'll never forget my first love. See, I'll never forget my first love...

As the acoustic accompanied words of Passion play in my car, Vasooda sits in the passenger's seat, peering up at me. Those eyes, chestnut in hue, search my face for the truth while she poses the following question: "Were you thinking of somebody special during that song?"

I lie.
"No."
She calls me on it, grinning just a bit.

"Yeah you were..." and that was that. She didn't press for any more information, and I did not want to open up anymore. The two of us were having an amazing morning/afternoon/early evening together.. met up in the morning and had a big auditorium to ourselves for roughly an hour, took our final exam, went out to eat somewhere near campus and enjoyed one another's company for hours. We'd gone out a handful of times in the fall, and this was the best evening yet.

I felt bad for lying to her. I still do.


Changing gears...

I made a promise to someone in Janurary( or maybe last December) that I would write more than one entry a month. I think I succeeded :) Hopefully, I'll continue this tradition on in the new year.

Merry Jesus Day, Nutang. Thank God you're back.

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