You know...everything is perfectly fine...until I get up. Then..I start sneezing, my eyes start watering...and my throat is scratchy..Im really sick of this always happening. I should get some sort of allergy medicine or something. You know what else happens? FLYS! Ugh...they land on my face and my arms so I have to like..put the blanket over my head so I can go back to sleep. PLUS! I wake up every morning at 8:30 to PEE! Yes..it's like the sametime...every morning! So then I go back to sleep...and I usually sleep for two hour sor less...then I get up. This really sucks..I was suppose to go with Iggy to do applications in Mansfield...but..I moved the date till tomorrow, b/c tomorrow, Id have to get up at 7..not 5 like this morning. Im a lazy bum, what can I say..it's going to be fun! We are going out to lunch and stuff..sooo..anyways. Ive decided not to have my rummage sale this year.. So..my sis and I ahve to put all the boxes of shit back upstairs and we'll do it when coryland has their sales next year. That way...we make more money. We are only going to be make a 100 now..so..whatever...Plus there's a party saturday and I dont want to miss it. lmao..Im selfish like that. So anyways..Who likes Finch? WELL I DO NOW! I never really..listened to them before, but...I definatly do now thanks to Doug..haha I love them! I want to marry them, like I want to marry other bands.. :):) Yeehaw... So I havent talked to my mom yet this morning, but she is going to be pissed about not doing the whole rummage sale..oh well, she'll get over it. Anyways...HB and I are okay again. I love him muches! Hehe.. I hope he comes up..b/c I miss him and wants to see him. :) Brian...I dunno... :( Wish he'd talk to me..anyways..Im going to head out..I think its a Laugna beach day..and I do not want to miss that.. Peace my loves

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go away...come again another day..all the world is waiting for the sun.." I love breaking benjamin...I wanna marry them! hehehe of course, I wanna marry a lot of bands and stuff like that. ugh it's getting muggy! GUESS WHAT I DROVE TODAY! A CAMERO! let's just say..it was a thrill for me. I guess my dad's friend is letting him borrow it for awhile...what kind of a friend lets you borrow his CAMERO..my dad's friend I guess...sooo he let us drive it..but shhh dont tell anyone. It's actually for sale, but.. my parents arent buying it b/c they want my sister and I to have suv's with four wheel drive..wtf! oh well..its pretty, and I want it..really bad. My dad came home, and he is like..look out the window..and I do..and Im like DADDY I WANNA DRIVE IT PWWWEASSSE! so of course..I got my way..and I gots to drive it..heck yes my friends..heck yes! SO...about the mom and me story..let's just say....I dunno. She always has to be this big baby all day and it makes me really mad. Its like Im suppose to feel bad but I dont..Im sick of doing stuff for her every second..and she is like..well I cant stand up that long..or...I cant walk that far..what are you going to do when Heath and I go to college? Im definatly not coming home every weekend to clean the goddamn house.. Ill be living at college..ugh I dunno..I know I sound like a big baby..but she uses us for her biddings and everytime I complain about it she is like..well I hope you have a child with a disability so you have to deal with it all the time..thanks mom..or she tells me how hurt she is..well..I just want you to be better, and laying around here doing nothing but just..laying around..isnt helping you..she has to get up and walk..she is sucha baby at home, but when she actually goes out into the world..she is like..okay, and she isnt sick. Sometimes..I just think she does it here to make a point and get attention. All of you are like..OMG YOU BITCH! but its just how I feel...she believes I get up every morning thinking of ways to get into fights with her..give me a fucking break.. look I feel bad for her and stuff, and OF COURSE, I do what she asks me too..but..its like I cant go anywhere b/c no one is here to help her....so Im stuck at home all the fucking time and everyone asks why I dont go out..and when I do..she says Im never home enough when Im here..ALL FUCKING DAY! So anyways..Im talking to my loves...Brittany and Asti..so Im going to go...helps past time while Im waiting for HB to get on..peace out kids!

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Let's talk...about parents..now..mine..are just..annoying..Well..its more like my mom..Talk about not being able to be free and do anything. So my friends and I wanted to go out thursday to a club to go dancing...and I cant go b/c..."its a bar" What..the fuck? I know Im 18...a lot of my friends might go..I mean, there is some friends that are probably going who their parents are MORE strict than me..but my mom has to be the biggest bitch about it...she is like, do what you want in college..but... dont do under my roof..and then she gives me this whole talk about how I wake up every morning just thinking of ways to make her mad. WTF? Yes..this exactly what my first thought is..every morning when I get up..how could I forget..anyways..Im done for now.. :) peace it lovas and mothas

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Bed..dreaming.. :)






For HB!:

Ive been here before a few times
And I'm quite aware we're dying
And your hands they shake with goodbyes
And Ill take you back if you'd have me
So here I am I'm trying
So here I am are you ready
Come on let me hold you,
Touch you, feel you
Always
Kiss you, taste you all night
Always
And I'll miss your laugh your smile
I'll admit I'm wrong if you'd tell me
I'm so sick of fights, I hate them
Lets start this again for real
So here I am I'm trying
So here I am are you ready
So here I am I'm trying
So here I am are you ready
Come on let me hold you,
Touch you, feel you
Always
Kiss you taste you all night
Always

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I fucking hate today...I just want it to end.. :(:(:(:(:(

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I saw Brian.. :) heck yes! He is cute...and funny. :) YAY! Im really happy..but Im really sad right now. My friend is havin a party next weekend..and my friend Tabby cant go. Im so upset right now..just for the fact its the last time we'll see Lev before she leaves for college. I didnt think it would be this hard, but it is. It sucks when you grow up with these people....and they just have to leave your life..to move on with their own. And they all are like..Im not going to mansfield b/c...well..I dont want to see anyone ..blah blah blah...then why is it hard for you? Its hard for me....really it is..that's why Im sticking around. I dont want to grow up yet...Im 18..and I want to enjoy it for awhile..while...Im still studying..anyways..Im done for the moment..b/c Im crying..peace

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