Life can sometimes be like a washing machine. .

Just the other day while doing my laundry I started to daydream. I saw the water filling up during the rinse cycle. All the clothes were squashed against the sides as the water began to fill. Then once it was full the clothes began to get tossed from left to right and top to bottom. When they are all cleaned and wash they get air dried in heat. That is the best part. They separate, fluff, and smell fresh.

To me life can be this way at times. Like the wash cycle, you feel stuck and heavy. Then as the water (problems) fills you begin to drown, getting tossed in many directions. Once life sends through the rinse cycle and you think all is lost. You get tossed into the sunshine (drier) to heal, renew and re-live.

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I may be old fashioned but I believe in an "eye for an eye". If someone commits murder, kills their parents, children, or anyone for personal gain, should receive the same punishment. The death penalty is outlawed in some states but someone like that crazy nut at Virginia Tech should have not been able to take the easy way out. Someone else should have shot him point blank. If he were captured and imprisoned justice would not have been done. There are so many laws to protect someone like him. Still, I feel that one of the family members, best friends, etc should have been the one to pull the trigger.

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mood: ANGRY

My eldest son is 18, doesnt pay rent, does not help out around the house with cleaning or washing the dishes. He just comes home in time to sleep. In the morning wakes up and leaves the house till night time. He works and does not contribute to any of the bills. I just asked him to get up because I need him to pick up my paycheck to pay the rent. He wont get up and is pissed at me for bothering him.

So I call his dad, who has not paid child support in 4 years, and ask him to call Josh and wake him up! He says that he will. So I wait and wait and wait. My sons phone does not ring. So I call that deadbeat back and ask him, "did you call?" he says, "no. I was just going to do that but then you called." YEAH RIGHT!! Then he said, I will just leave him a message because if he knows I am calling he will want to come here and spend some time cuz he has so much fun here. I said, "I DONT CARE WHAT HE DOES AFTER. I WILL DROP IS A** OFF ANYWHERE HE WANTS TO GO. THAT FREELOADER DOES SH** AROUND HERE AND I NEVER ASK HIM FOR ANYTHING! YOU NEED TO GET HIM UP BECAUSE I NEED THIS MONEY TO PAY THE RENT." I mean like father like son right??!! I feel like I am asking a BLIND man to borrow his walking stick!

CRAP I AM SO ANGRY!!

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This week has been just one doctor appointment after another. I cant keep up. Last week thursday I visited 4 doctors at 4 different offices. I was friggen tired by the end of the day!!

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I knew that I didnt like my job but now I realize that I REALLY hate it! I am so happy not being at work and I wish I could do something else. I need to find another job. I wish I could do little work for a lot of money. That is my dream. I need to figure out how to use my education for success. So many keys... where is the door?

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You are a Brainy Girl!

Whether you're an official student or a casual learner, you enjoy hitting the books. You know a little bit about everything, and you're always dying to know more. For a guy to win your heart, he's got to share some of your intellectual interests. A awesome book collection of his own doesn't hurt either!

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I went to a local chinese buffet thursday with my eldest son. We were famished and wanting to eat something like right now. You cant get faster service than doing it yourself so we did just that. We have eaten there before and really like their food.

I started with my usual and so did he. I like seafood and had the peel and eat shrimp, calamari, coconut shrimp and some noodles. He had some shrimp and muscles.

As we were eating he bit something hard and thought it was a part of the muscles shell. So he moved it to the front of his mouth and spit it out. I was AMAZED to see a little crab come out of his mouth. YEA that's right!! There was this miniature crab, legs, body and all. I told him, "wow! the muscle swallowed the crab and you ate the muscle. This is the food chain in action!!" He was like that is so gross....

The little crab in the shell it came out of..



Little crab at the end of the plate



Close up

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Sometimes I feel as if we are here just killing time. I wonder if I am really doing my life justice. We all come into contact and meet people for a specific reason. I feel that is a part of destiny. Everyone has their OWN destiny and I do not think that anyone should know what your destiny is other than yourself. My aunt believes that she knows what MY destiny is. I don't think so. I think people say that so that they may control you.

Just remember that. If anyone says they know what your destiny is then you have to really step back and think... "Is this person trying to control me?"

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