okay.. so there is this guy and he is amazing.. he is sweet and funny and cute and he makes me feel happy..

but

i feel like i am nothing to him. i mean he tols me that he really lliked me but then something happend and he has been really distan with everyone.. so idk...


then i saw him yesturday and we kissed and flirted and all that but i am just soo confussed on what we "are".... ughughughughughughughughughugh

ugh

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Don't you ever have those days where it seems like nothing can go right and everything is going wrong? well.. it has been one of those days.


I looked around at lunch and realized that almost everyone of those days and it made me start to think.. i don't know what is going on in their life and I don't even know what will hapen to them when they leave highschool to start their lives. And it just made me start to wonder what is goping on with the rest of the worls. I mean while I am sitting at lunch and ignoring people for my own reasons, I wonder why other people are doing the same thing.

And then there are those times when you are happy and you look around and see sad people and you just want to go up to them and tell them that it will all go away and give them a huge hug. You sit there and wonder what in their lives could be so wrong that they would just not want to live that day out, insteead they chose to walk around like a zombie..

today though.. i feel like scratching Heather Janean out of every single journal ebtry that i have and erase my existance.. and I don't know why..

its like I just want to run around screaming leave me the fuck alone! and then maybe people will get that i just want to be alone.. but they never get that...

maybe that is what is going on in the other peoples minds.. just trying to shrink away from life...idk

that is just what is going on in my mind right now...

heather janean

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woooo

so we had out chior districts and i am pretty sure sure that we got all 1's!!!

in case you dont know, that is the best that you can get.. so yeah

kjlsfdfkjlfsd

heather

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wow...

i am on a mission, i am going to try and as little sleep as possible and see what happens... so far i just keep forgeting waht day it is... but you never know.. on friday i might be seeing unicorns, that would be fun....


so yeah... that is what my life consists of.. absolutley nothing...


heather that one chick janean

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you know what i miss most about summer?

being able to say, fuck you school. i am going to sleep into today! i really miss that.. i also miss having freedom on the most beautiful days of the year...

ahhh. sleep.. what does thine feel like again??

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so i had a soccer meeting today and they moved the dates to monday - wed.... which means it starts earlier.. ahh that makes me even more nervous!!

ahahahahaha

but on the brightside the caoch has been telling me good things.


i love sheep!

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