im switching over to xanga, ill be there. sorry for the move, but sometimes change is needed.

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i know this is wierd, but i like seeing you angry. its cute. super cute. so, sometimes i like to provoke you and see it. it silly. but what i wrote on that napkin, i mean. im yours, and yours alone. string me in a tree, cut off my skin, and eat my heart, because if thats what makes you happy, then do it. i just want you to be happy. my dad is watching tv, and he took over my bed, because ever since i found out he did it in my bed ive been sleeping on my couch... because well..... ewwww. anyway, i enjoy this. i love this weekend, because im home, and im happy, and when you came down i was happy, even after my car died, and you know what, im happy. this wednesday, you should come for movie night, we can watch animal house and requiem for a dream. it would be awesome. anyway, im gonna go, because my dad is going to sleep soon. damn tv, it runs his life, i swear. but, who cares, you laughed at my jokes. (well some of them at least) and thats excellent. whee!!!

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its wierd. for the first time in a while, im going to bed before 3 am. i told myself that i need to sleep, so that tomorrow, the big day, im rested and ready. my friend josh, who works at the comic store is back, and tomorrow we're going to go visit him at work, and then catch up with him after work and pull an all nighter. then, sunday morning, im going to breakfast with josh, kelly, and britt (yay!) and then i dont know whats going on. so, im gonna listen to incubus and calm myself down and let the morning slip into my head...... goodnight folks.

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damnit. i dont want to tell you this, but i miss you. i know for like the next two days, we probably wont see each other, maybe talk on the phone, but seriously. i miss you. how pathetic. you left maybe 5 hours ago, and already i want you to be back here, or at least me be in hershey. grrr. i wish you would have stayed all night, we could have had awesome fun.. except for, well.. im not going in to that. anyway, thanks. you held my hand because i was crying, and i knew you cared. thanks. oh, and if i didnt mention this...... i miss you.

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yeah, dont worry. im not depressed, nor angry. im fine, as a matter of fact, and im great because of romance. sappy passionate romance. but i noticed something, that going like this i will clearly bottle my passion and love, until one day when i explode. im not complaining though, because once i can release it, it will be the best night i (And whoever happens to be with me at the time, although theres only one person i want) could ever experience. i know what they'll tell me. give up the wait jon. go find another girl, because then maybe you'll be happy. forget that. why would i give up waiting for something great, and just taking something that wouldnt go anywhere for maybe a week? why would i chase something that has to end? something great for a moment, then its gone. im taking the first choice damnit, and thats the only way i can be happy. i wish i could sleep right now, but i have practice in an hour. dont worry about me, im ok, im just waiting. oh, and im not giving up this fight, whether i said i was going to or not.

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let me hold your hand, as gently as i can and tell you what im thinking. Let me kiss your cheek, and tell you that im meek next to your spleandor. let me get caught up in the passion, and in romantic fashion run my finger down your spine. let me hold you tight, and kiss you through the night, and finally be in heaven. let me wake up next to you, and know that it is true, and never have to let you go. let me say those words, and know it doesnt hurt because i know you feel the same.

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