I think I have a phobia of going back to work. A slight anxious feeling comes over me. It has now been over 6 months since I left for maternity leave and on Monday I will be returning to the desk job. It really sucks! I am so used to being in the comfort of my own home, having to wake up at whatever time I please, do what ever I please and play with my beautiful daughter, Sofia.

In a way I am scared that I cannot handle the situation of being separated from my daughter and become very upset. Not because I feel guilty...but because I know I will miss out on all the lil things that she will do. In a way I am jealous of Fernando having time to spend with her. I cannot be selfish though, cuz he has been working the 6 months and it is his turn to play with Sofia.

Also I think I will be a big imbecile when it comes to working again. Because I have forgotten most of what my job entails. The legislation, the policies...I feel really dumb right now! I think my brain has been so used to be in 'baby' mode, that I will come out looking and sounding like an idiot. Ohhh and how society can be so judgemental.

Plus I don't really want to go back into the work environment simply because of the countless and constant number of questions I will have to answer to. I would rather put a sign board around my neck and stay quiet for the rest of the day..I only like to tell my close work mates...not those random people who think it is 'polite' to approach me now, who never did before.

So many lil things to worry about...it's causing me a lot of stress right now actually! But I have to admit I have a lil bit of excitement in my belly, cuz I will be surrounded by news and current world events, adult jokes once again :)

re: comment
thanks, its been a week and i'm actually looking foward to the next time i get to see him again :) and what a coincidence, we both have fernandos! haha

oh & have fun going back to work! what do you do anyway?
» chocobopnai on 2008-01-21 12:13:49

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