I feel really really shit today, like my brain is in overload thinking about lots of shit stuff. I just want to chill out tonight at the ASIA cocktail (an annual event) with my friends. Yohana my best friend cannot come cuz she is sick, but I think it isnt true...she is probably bz with her druggie friends and rather not hang out with Tiff and I. I feel really crap about that, that she is the one tat decided to go. I dunno, I just get disappointed really easy now a days...I have no tolerance for it.

Plus since the drama with the uni grp mate things have gotten worse. Yesterday we had a grp meeting, I was hoping Ling the Chinese girl would come back in time. She did, but she in the morning, so she was too tired to attend the meeting. We sat to chat about our law assignment, and after he said he was sorry bout the email, cuz he thought he had upset me. I was feeling rather awkward, especially when he passed me a gift. I didnt want it, but it was a friends bracelet and he insisted. I asked if that girl, who hangs around him is his girlfriend, and she is! So he is someone's bf, which made me kinda sick. I didnt want to be the "homewrecker", the girl who the bf is secretly seeing. Anyways we just chat about general stuff, and he says he is having probs with his girl...I wanted to offer him advice to help but he wouldn't hear of it. He even wanted to see me after graduation, whateva tat means. But i felt so uncomfortable..

Now today he tells me that he told his gf about our meeting and she of course is pissed off! Probably wants to kill me, but I have not done anything wrong. Or have I? I have not encouraged him at all... She broke it off with him, which is not a surprise, I would do the same. I just cant believe what is happening, and I feel like I have caused some couple to break up, even though I havent done nothing at all! Just the stupid guy likes me! Especially since they been going out for 3 yrs, *sigh*. I wish he never got me involved...I honestly feel like crap and I hurt for the girl cuz she is such a nice person, for I have met her. I don't know what to say wen I see her again, cuz she hates me for her bf liking me. I cant say sorry...sorry for what? That the rship ended like this...

My head just hurts, I hate dramas and anything tat is related to conflict. And especially when it involves other parties who are innocent, why do I feel like the guilty one? I told him that we should not meet up unless it is for uni and when someone else is there, like LING!!! His gf made it clear she doesnt want him to have anything to do with me. So yea...pls advise somebody, anybody!! I want to say something to this girl, but I dunno whether I should...could make things worse :(

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