Fire alarm!

The shrill, urgent tones pierce through the cool autumn night. I am walking home from the common room in a post-rugby defeat funk when the sound suddenly interrupts my reverie.

At first, I am inclined to ignore it. It's probably just burnt toast or students drunkenly setting themselves on fire. But hang on, what if it's a proper fire? With roaring flames, people screaming for help and pets chucked out the window? I already missed last month's car chase which culminated gloriously with the perpetrator ramming through the fence and crashing into the laundry building. I definitely don't want to miss a fire too. Besides, fire engines! Sirens, flashing lights and more importantly, firemen.

♪ Firemen, firemen! ♪

I hunt for the source of the fire alarm. It is the Coles across the road! There's no fire in sight, but there's smoke wafting from the side of the building.

"Oh no, where will we get our groceries?" moans one of my fellow onlookers.

She is right! I start to panic, but calm down when I remember that it's Saturday. It's alright, the Coles people will have the whole of Sunday to rebuild the store before Monday rolls around.

Still, I decide that we should loot the store just in case we run out of supplies.

"Let's loot the store just in case we run out of supplies," I suggest to the other onlookers.

My idea is hailed with much cheering and exuberance. I feel very proud of myself. Until it is pointed out that there are no windows through which we can smash our way in.

Boooooo!

Before I can come up with another plan to save us from starvation, a fire engine announces its arrival with wailing sirens. Then another. And another. Three fire engines, each bursting with firemen.

♪ Firemen, firemen! ♪

Impending starvation is forgotten as firemen pour out of the fire engines. Firemen in fire suits and fire helmets and fire boots. And underneath those fire suits and fire helmets and fire boots are smoking hot bodies. I can't see them, but they're definitely there. After all, firemen work as part-time strippers when they're off-duty.

I watch as they carry out their job purposefully. Some walk purposefully around the building, some stare purposefully across the road at us, while the others mill purposefully around the fire engines, chatting purposefully among themselves. Then they all purposefully climb into the fire engines and purposefully drive off.

Drive off?! Where were the hoses?! And the great arcing blast of water taming the wild blaze?! The heroic battle against the wanton, destructive power of a...non-existent fire. Oh. I remember that we hadn't really seen a fire at all. Just a few wisps of smoke. Which had dissipated by the time the fire engines arrived.

Boooooo!

One of the fire engines sweeps by us, lights dimmed and sirens silenced. I automatically wave as it goes past. But no one waves back.

Boooooo!

Categories: Perth [t]

Disappointing.
Next time, loot the store, THEN set a real fire.

*cough*
» middaymoon on 2007-05-15 05:07:49

Aw...you poor dear. How disappointing.
» Silver-dot- on 2007-05-15 05:19:20

middaymoon: Good suggestion. But...did that come from experience?

silver-dot-: It was quite. :( I hope firemen are more fun when they're working their second job.
» theZEBRA on 2007-05-15 09:37:24

Part-time strippers?
Well I got to hand it to you, though I wouldn't want the Malaysian firefighters. Even though it's a disappointing episode, you'll still get your groceries next week.
» Nuttz on 2007-05-16 01:35:01

Firemen as part-time strippers. Now that is something I would love to see.
» Southern on 2007-05-16 01:45:50

no pictures of these alleged stripper firemen?

Boooooo!
» AJ (218.111.47.226) on 2007-05-16 01:23:38

Hot firemen. I would swoon just to have them catch me.
» Paul (218.111.161.122) on 2007-05-17 09:46:09

Sigh... I need a handsome AND hot fireman to come rescue me! Sigh...
» Qian (202.172.113.234) on 2007-05-18 03:27:25

Nuttz: Very little consolation tho.

Southern: Uniformeds always make good strippers! :D

AJ: Fetch a camera and risk missing out on firemen action?! I think not!

Paul: Haha, smoke inhalation. Perfect excuse.

Qian: Start a fire!
» theZEBRA on 2007-05-20 02:19:21

Ooh! I actually almost did! I burnt a huge hole in my quilt coz it fell on my heater. Woke up with a whole lot of smoke in my room. Took ages to get rid of the smell! Sigh... no firemen though...
» Qian (202.172.113.234) on 2007-05-22 02:11:06

Qian: What happened to your smoke detector?!!! What if you had burnt to death!! DANGEROUS!!
» theZEBRA on 2007-05-23 05:08:31

thank goodness there's no smoke detector wei!!! nanti i have to pay $400 PER fire engine! although maybe it would've been nice to have 4 fire engines full of sexy firemen coming to my rescue. but no la... there was no fire. just smoke. although i technically COULD have died. but i'm fine. no worries!
» Qian (202.172.113.234) on 2007-05-23 11:40:22

Qian: Crazy girl. Is your window big enough to climb out at least?
» theZEBRA on 2007-05-26 07:47:28

yeah. but got mosquitoe netting. so i'd have to rip that out first. i think having a hunky fireman save me is a much better way of escape. hehe..
» Qian (202.172.113.234) on 2007-05-29 06:25:33

Yes it is a fantasy
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