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One would be in less danger
From the wiles of a stranger
If one's own kin and kith
Were more fun to be with.

Ogden Nash
I'd Rather Be Nekkid
Friday. 7.7.06 10:16 pm
Catastrophe!

I'm curled up in a naked ball of misery, sobbing in frustration. Despair overwhelms me. It's not the first time that this has happened, and I'm quite certain that it won't be the last. I want to scream at the unfairness of it all but the neighbours lodged a complaint the last time. I settle for squeezing stress balls instead, but my stress levels stay in the danger-red zone. I'm probably squeezing the wrong balls.

I'm not over-reacting. You would feel the same way if...

*pauses for dramatic effect*

YOU HAD NO CLOTHES!

Oh, I don't mean that I've been forced to walk outside in full nekkid glory. I stopped once the neighbours complained about that as well. I'm just so SICK of everything I have. I have to hold back a wave of nausea just imagining wearing the same outfit one more time. While I'm usually one of the first numbers you'd dial for a night out with (and so modest too, notice how I said "one of the first" and not "the first"?), I wouldn't be much fun at the table if I puked a little in my mouth every time I looked down.

It's because I hate buying clothes. No, no, that's not true. I love spending money on clothes (preferably other people's money). What I hate is the actual process of choosing clothes. MNG racks of clothes fill me with dread. Potential mind-numbing boredom of sifting through miles and miles of clothing which (a.) are too daggy for me to wear, or (b.) I'm too daggy to wear. I'd much rather wait in the dressing room while my friends (amounts to the same thing really) throw options over the door. But when I suggest this very simple solution, they bitch and whine at me instead. Hmph. The amount I'm paying them to be my friends, you'd assume that personal shopping would be included in the services.

Sigh. I want to move to a nudist colony.

*Has a sudden mental image of saggy bits*

Maybe not.

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10 Comments.


Poor you...
But wait, I thought birthday suit considered as clothe too ? Maybe not...XO
» Yung Jie (60.49.202.94) on 2006-07-07 10:36:30

YJ: Laughing at my misery. :(
» theZEBRA on 2006-07-08 06:16:15

aw..
I am sure there's some clothes will suit you.
» YungJie (60.51.225.173) on 2006-07-08 10:23:17

I don't mind! you can spend all the money on things that i actually want to buy for myself! since you're going back to perth, i doubt i'll really see much of you, therefore eliminating any jealous feelings that i may have which were causing me to regret shopping FOR you. u get my drift. YOU! were supposed to call/email me once u get back!!!! can u pls suggest some way that i can contact u? you're never on msn!
» Qian (60.48.116.28) on 2006-07-08 02:30:06

No clothes!? I am ashamed of ya! Have you learned nothing from Brother Jay and me! Get yourself to the mall now! Paul
» Paul (202.75.36.221) on 2006-07-09 12:21:09

AW! Ta hell with the neighbors!
If you can buy friends, you can use it as hush money when you eliminate your neighbors. Or just do what I do, continue to walk around unabashidly nekkid...blinds WIDE OPEN! Better yet, I'll send Xena over to live with them and with any lucky, they'll be skewered by flaming arrows post haste!
» Noacat on 2006-07-09 05:26:31

YJ: Exactly! Now I just need friends who'll find them for me.

Qian: Hahahaha, sorry sorry. I was supposed to meet up with Chiam as well, but that didn't turn out cuz we couldn't find enough ppl to play futsal with.

Paul: Ghrrrkk...the malls are so booooring. :( It's the same clothes over and over again. I need somewhere new to shop. A place where the sales assistants throw clothes over the dressing room door for you.

Noacat: Yes, good idea. But what if I bump into her and she crushes ME with her thighs?
» theZEBRA on 2006-07-09 08:41:43

Blindfold and ear-plugged yaself so that u can't see nor hear ya neighbours. Ain't working? Blindfold ya neighbours then. Seriously........tot gurls are good at buying clothes. e.g. same shirt, dress or shoe but a myrid of colours.......
» souplad (192.245.246.12) on 2006-07-09 09:11:12

I think all the fun is in the picking! I'm serious. We should totally go get some new stuff for you! Where will you be shopping?
» Laynie (219.95.162.68) on 2006-07-12 11:06:36

It was my error.
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» Evan (218.90.171.249) on 2010-09-03 08:25:52

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