theZEBRA's Weblog Site • NuTang.com

I was at another birthday party last night. But one with rules:

"EXCLUDING UNDERGARMENTS ALL APPAREL MUST BE OF A PARTICULARLY BAD TASTE. OP-SHOP QUALITY IS PREFERRED. HOWEVER IF YOUR OWN WARDROBE ACCOMMODATES THEN PERSONAL BAD TASTE CLOTHING WILL BE ACCEPTED.

SHOE QUALITY IS OPTIONAL DUE TO THE INTOXICATION SAFETY ACT OF 1985."

I decided to go with a stripey theme - I am, after all, a zebra:

Stripey black-n-white toe socks
Stripey candy-coloured pajama pants
Black-n-white striped jailbird shirt (a salute to Aussie heritage)
Red Scottish Tammy hat, complete with fake red hair (not stripey, but it was plaid - close enough)

Perfik.

Actually getting to the party was a bit touch 'n go at first. The first bus that came by tried to run me over but had a change of heart at the last moment and went for a jogger wearing tights instead. So I waited half an hour for the next one, and even then I had to take my Tammy off before the driver allowed me on (he must've still been smarting over Australia's lost swimming golds).

I managed to reach the party without further incident (no one wanted to sit next to me on the bus though - rejection hurts). Pulled the Tammy back on, gave myself a quick onceover, and walked through the door.

And had a Bridget Jones "Tarts and Vicars" moment. Apparently, everyone else had taken "Bad Taste" to mean shirts advertising crap bands or crap drinks. As far as I could see, the title-holder of "Worst Taste" pre-stripes was an English rugger jersey.

It was going to be a lousy night.

I ran to hide in the kitchen. And just as I popped the cap off a bottle, a voice floated out from behind the island.

"There's a rental fee if you're gonna share my hiding spot."

It was my Mauritian Soccer Guy! In full dag glory! Chelsea jersey! Mickey Mouse boxers! Winnee the Pooh suspenders! Hideous bow tie! Purple football socks!

It was going to be a great night.

Categories: Blokes [t]

some pictures would definitely sppice things up!
» bUttsH4k3r (62.252.224.16) on 2006-03-26 02:22:47

yes. I agree with bUttsH4k3r! put some pictures to glorify your ugliness!
» jase (130.220.79.98) on 2006-03-26 11:40:41

Stripes and plaid? Sounds like a pretty cool outfit.
» JJ (68.34.248.78) on 2006-03-27 08:33:53

ha!
I use to h8 striped stuff, but now it lookz really good on me! i have this obsession with checkered stuff now. I like your journal 2, red&black are just some of my many favorite colors. -aNdY
» imnotokay on 2006-03-27 10:00:46

Photos!!! Photos!! especially of the mauritian soccer guy!!
» AJ (219.93.73.114) on 2006-03-28 03:25:33

And is Mauritian Soccer Guy going to fight Bottleshop Adam? Or are they not in direct competition? (Heh heh. I'm going anonymous again. Heh heh.)
» (62.253.64.16) on 2006-03-28 05:44:48

I think we need photos for comparison. You could use your crazy blog fans as an excuse to get a picture. and see if either of them has a brother who's gay. Paul
» Paul (218.111.38.215) on 2006-03-28 08:58:05

Yup, photos will be nice. No need to show your face, just your clothes will do. And of course, the mauritian guy too ;P
» derek (203.106.28.194) on 2006-03-30 07:10:50

You could always have dressed up in your rugby t-shirt. Rugby -shudders delicately-
» Jay (82.69.108.126) on 2006-03-30 08:37:22

JME!
She's bloody alcoholically slumped over a table again, I'm telling you...
» Katy Newton (62.253.64.16) on 2006-03-31 10:09:34

1. NO NO NO NO NO!!! NO PICCIES! Bad enough I have you lot laughing at me as it is. 2. I'm Not slunmped over a table!!!
» theZEBRA on 2006-03-31 02:12:20

Awwwwww... The cuteness.
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