Home | Join! | Help | Browse | Forums | NuWorld | NWF | PoPo   
theZEBRA
just spent the weekend at the army barracks
Is Chewing On
Reading:



Creation
Gore Vidal

Listening to:



Everything in Transit
Jack's Mannequin
Lick Those Stripes!
www.flickr.com
This is a Flickr badge showing public photos from Jamesies. Make your own badge here.
The Herd
Carresser of Annabelle
Crazy Lone Ranger
Dave
Freddy
Island Sinker
Labert Leopard
Laynie
Lego Man
Shakin' That Ass
Sloth Min
Trina
Uber Bitch Jase
Van Ren


<<#?>>


Join One Thousand Bloggers



Songs of the Plains
Family Court

One would be in less danger
From the wiles of a stranger
If one's own kin and kith
Were more fun to be with.

Ogden Nash
Lesbians and Pancakes
Friday. 11.4.05 11:052 pm
I did intend to blog about Saturday's lesbian party. But frankly, it was just too frustrating to be relived. So many things that pissed me off, where do I start?

The fact that we arrived almost two hours too early? The general dodginess of the 10 metres between my car and the club, where I half expected to be kidnapped and dragged off to live the rest of my life as the sex slave of a psychotic BDSM dom(me)? The 10 bucks that was extorted from me for parking in a patch of weeds? The two lesbians who grilled me for 15 minutes about the research, leaving me flailing wildly and wishing that I had been kidnapped and leashed in a bedroom far, far away? Or maybe it was the crap beer that cost 18 frigging bucks a bottle. No wonder everyone was so late - they were all busy getting drunk elsewhere first.

Ah, I've got it. The one thing that made me wish I had stayed home and emailed lesbians instead. NO ONE PICKED ME UP! No requests for phone numbers, no leery quirk of an eyebrow, nothing! Sure, I got offered a drink and asked to dance a couple of times, but these were girls I already knew so that didn't count! Argh, am I that unattractive to my own sex? Did I smell funny? Look too arrogant, too awkward, too straight? Did I violate some secret lesbian code? Or was it because I refused to pick up, preferring rather to lounge by the stairs and the bar, and be picked up...bloody waste of time, as it turned out.

It's almost cut-myself depressing. While I did find out for sure that I'm straight, I also found out that I don't really have a choice in that matter. ARGH! It would be nice to be bi - there were so many hot girls there! So many options compared to the elusive hot (and usually not available) guy at your average straight club.

So much for not reliving that night. I shall now focus on something more uplifting instead.

I MADE PANCAKES TODAY! For the first time ever! With Mindy's and Jason's help and I used pancake mix, but it's still an achievement. No burn wounds, no explosions, no screaming fire alarms, no food poisioning (yet). Plus I didn't even use measuring cups or anything, I did a Jamie Oliver instead - "I think it needs more water, do you think it needs more water? Let's add more water...god, that's too much water." I'm a culinary genius! I've found my niche. I'm gonna make oodles of money selling pancakes. Probably open one of them flash pancake houses (like Paddington's) and charge equally flash prices for Pillsbury buttermilk pancake mix.

And after I become a pancake mogul, I'll open a lesbian club where I'll have to hire bodyguards to fend off my frillion admirers (who'll probably just be attracted to my money, but what the hell).

Categories:

44 Comments.


Why don't you just open a lesbian pancake house/nightclub. You can get your freak on while you get your eat on.
» DeeVeuS on 2005-11-04 10:33:31

Lesbian pat-a-cakes! Hey, you should research gay parties next... and if you chance upon a sweet, available gay man, send him my way. Paul
» Paul (219.95.189.151) on 2005-11-04 11:26:17

lol... ur pancakes probably will give off "straight" vibes unless they are prepared with much "love".
» chloe (219.94.82.130) on 2005-11-04 11:57:34

Deeveus: Unfortunately, I'm too straight to get my freak on there. Everyone else is welcome to get their freak on tho, providing they lock the toilet doors

Paul: Mmm...I should. I'll have to count on you for an invite then ;). And what would Big Bicep Barry say to my pimping out gay guys to you?

Chloe: Exactly what would this "love" be? Anything that would set the Ministry of Health watchdogs on my beloved pancake house?
» theZEBRA on 2005-11-04 06:58:03

Maple Syrup?
You did have maple syrup, right? It's almost criminal to have pancakes without syrup.
» KE (218.208.205.57) on 2005-11-04 09:42:48

Went out once with a buddy, and with nothing better to do, crashed a party of lesbians at a club. They were fun people. Really. And some were hot. Some
» Beer Brat (202.156.6.69) on 2005-11-04 10:10:27

wth
i don't get you. it makes no difference to you whether you get hit on or not coz you're as straight as they come, but you're offended that you didn't get hit on?? so you just want them to go: "hey, you're hot." and you go..."no thanks, I'm straight."???? maybe it a reciprocation thing. you need to hit on them first. maybe that'd help. not that I can imagine any of them being shy to hit on you. it's a lesbian club dammit.
» Qian (219.95.130.213) on 2005-11-04 10:22:33

Aw, don't be too hard on yourself. Am sure some on them *really really* wanted to get in your pants. Erm, on that note - hope you feel better :D
» Shan (60.48.42.17) on 2005-11-04 10:56:54

KE: Actually, no. I bought honey by mistake. And in my pancake house, you can have anything you want on your pancakes. Except maraschino cherries, cuz that's just gross.

Beer Brat: A group of guys tried to crash Saturday's party, but the bouncer wouldn't let them in. They dragged him out and started shoving and punching him. The manager had to come out to negotiate with them. Quite an eventful night, I must say.

Qian: Of course it makes a difference if girls find you hot too! And no, I wasn't gonna go "I'm straight, back off!". At the very least, I could have been bi...for the night. Lol.

Shan: Haha, what a--err, sweet thing to say. *Grin* And thanks, I do feel better today. I've reconciled myself to the fact that I'm meant to focus on guys.
» theZEBRA on 2005-11-05 01:42:48

omg.. i super need to blog on the pancakes also now.. hahaha.. and mine WILL be a different story about how i imagines you burning down my house with mindy as a catalyst... ARGHH i need a fire extinguisher!
» jase (211.24.253.212) on 2005-11-05 04:43:10

i saw a pic of your pancakes on jason's blog! i'm impressed! although he said they were horrible looking, i thought it was pretty good. and trust me, i've seen worse. abt the taste...well, i don't know abt that la... u cook pancakes for me nxt time, k? hehehe
» Qian (219.95.130.213) on 2005-11-05 10:51:36

yep
she sure was sushi. she made the costume herself. hers was by far the most creative costume. also, i missed out on some chocolate chip pancakes the other night and i'm still pretty bummed out by it.
» Chloefoxx on 2005-11-05 03:29:25

Jase: Or diarrhea pills, lol. Thanks for letting us flip pancakes in your kitchen. And I did learn to flip them properly! Almost...

Qian: Sadly, the pancake pics on Jason's blog aren't of the ones we made. Ours looked more misshapen. A lot more misshapen.

Chloefoxx: You can come eat chocolate chip pancakes at my pancake house. It's just a plane ride away.
» theZEBRA on 2005-11-05 08:14:02

well
when i win the lottery (oh wait, that'll never happen. the lottery is illegal in alabama. gambling is a sin you know...) well, when i inherit some money from a long last aunt who i didn't know existed and was a multi-millionare, i will fly directly to your pancake house. in my private jet.
» Chloefoxx on 2005-11-06 01:37:05

i thought he DID put a pic of ur pancakes there....the last one...no ah?
» Qian (203.121.0.19) on 2005-11-06 09:05:30

Chloefoxx: Gambling's illegal? Rot. You should lead a rebellion and declare Alabama an independent country. Then legalise gambling...and piracy (the music/movie kind, though the high seas sort would be fun too).

Qian: Nope. Those were at least sort of round. Ours were a bit more burnt and funny-looking. Alright fine, lots more.
» theZEBRA on 2005-11-06 09:21:18

wahh hahahaha.. if only la the pancakes she made looked anything like the one in my blog! qian--> NONE of the pictures were the pancakes that they made... because it was too horrible i'm afraid the camera might cracks.. okay la, that was super lame... we didn't have camera so no picture of the real pancakes.. haha
» jase (211.24.253.212) on 2005-11-06 09:53:49

Jason: I'd just like to remind you that you had a hand in making those pancakes as well. A couple of them anyway.
» theZEBRA on 2005-11-06 10:47:48

It's okay honey...cooking's overrated! Just hire a maid!
» Will (219.94.62.101) on 2005-11-06 11:44:23

Will: I've never tried my maid's cooking. Who needs to, when I can cook pancakes!
» theZEBRA on 2005-11-06 12:06:33

yeah
alabama already tried to rise up that one time... with a few other states. it didn't work out then but perhaps with my leadership skills (i'm a keyholder at movie gallery!) i can change history.
» Chloefoxx on 2005-11-06 03:44:24

Maybe you did smell and none of them came on to you. lolz. Lasbian Pancakes House huh, oh well, just do whatever you can to get hit on.
» Vimalan (60.50.246.146) on 2005-11-07 07:35:22

hah! lets see how long you can stand just eating pancakes everyday! i bet you'll die for some butter chicken rice, nasi lemak kang kang, ming tian pan mee and taiwan sausages in no time!
» jase (211.24.254.110) on 2005-11-07 07:55:15

Chloefoxx:When you're done changing history, remember to drop by my pancake house.

Vimalan: It's a Pancake House, then a Lesbian Club. Let's not be mixing the two together. And I object to the last part of your last sentence. It makes me sound desperate. The lesbian club is just for fun...whatever kind it may be. *Grin*

Jase: Someone should make a Badger Badger Pancake song. Mmm...or a Badger Badger Black Pepper Taiwan Sausage song.
» theZEBRA on 2005-11-07 07:46:05

it' ok, babes. I have faith in you! i'm sure you'll make the perfect tai-tai one day who does not have to cook, but can make beautiful pancakes like the ones in jase's blog. heheheh. of course, being a tai-tai, u don't actually have to make them urself....just get your minions to do it for you.
» Qian (203.121.0.19) on 2005-11-08 05:18:57

Qian: Eww..tai tai. That just smacks of non-career womanness. I intend to be an uber career power hungry maniac. Although minions do sound very appealing.
» theZEBRA on 2005-11-08 10:03:45

Each and everyone of the pancakes we made were unique in shape, texture and whether or not they were cooked... haha.. preffered the burnt ones though.. lets burn them next time
» Min (60.50.250.74) on 2005-11-09 10:45:34

Well, someone's school pic went in
Does that count? Several people reached in and picked up flaming sticks as well. My friends are easily fascinated by firemans gloves.
» redintersectsme on 2005-11-09 02:42:54

Pancakes? hmm... I was thinking about making donuts...*snigger*
» souplad (202.156.6.69) on 2005-11-09 07:53:09

Whoa, lesbian party! Wouldn't mind going too to do my own research, to see what a lesbian party is like. It must have been a downer not to be hit on. Perhaps you will have better luck at the straight clubs, where it really matters. ;P
» derek (218.111.152.35) on 2005-11-10 07:07:01

Min: My thoughts exactly. Each pancake was an experience to be savoured. Well said.

redintersectsme: I'm easily fascinated by firemen.

souplad: Infidel.

derek: That's what I told myself too. And I believe it. Almost.
» theZEBRA on 2005-11-10 10:40:39

you went to a lesbo club without me?? :( What if i were bi? Can you imagine the amount of fun i would have installed for me? hehe..
» Van Ren (61.6.159.27) on 2005-11-12 06:03:55

VR: Sorry boss!
» theZEBRA on 2005-11-12 09:51:42

I have the opposite problem. I can only attract gay men for some strange reason.
» ephez (60.49.110.54) on 2005-11-17 12:44:26

Ephez: You'd rather attract lesbians?
» theZEBRA on 2005-11-17 07:08:01

Way totally! If i attracted only lesbians, sigh...
» ephez (60.49.105.250) on 2005-11-21 11:43:00

Ephez: ...what would that make you?
» theZEBRA on 2005-11-21 12:10:47

In a threesome.
» ephez (60.49.104.202) on 2005-11-22 01:12:36

As the interactive dildo.
» ephez (60.49.104.202) on 2005-11-22 01:13:23

Ephez: Thank you for that thought.
» theZEBRA on 2005-11-23 08:11:16

You asked for it.
» ephez (60.49.106.159) on 2005-11-23 01:26:08

Your phrase is very good
Please, keep to the point. adipex diet pills What excellent interlocutors :) cheap Ativan You, casually, not the expert? xanax 2mg At you a migraine today? buy phentermine online Good topic tramadol ultram 4e1f4f
» Cruz (221.130.162.231) on 2010-09-03 03:31:10

Between us speaking, I so did not do.
The authoritative point of view buy xanax bars These are all fairy tales! xanax .5mg I can not recollect, where I about it read. buy xanax online cheap It seems magnificent idea to me is order meridia Here so history! order xanax bars e0a329
» Aron (115.236.98.109) on 2011-06-08 07:51:41

Rather valuable phrase
I understand this question. Is ready to help. buy prednisone In my opinion it already was discussed order xanax online In my opinion, it is a lie. cheap generic xanax What excellent topic wellbutrin dosage Matchless theme, it is interesting to me :) phentermine 37.5 mg 0a329a3
» Sydney (46.17.96.77) on 2011-07-09 05:09:30

Name.

URL.

[to enter your email, use "mailto:[email protected]"]
Subject.

Comment.

Word verification.

Copy the first 4 characters only.

If you are a member, try logging in again or accessing this page here.

theZEBRA's Weblog Site • NuTang.com

NuTang is the first web site to implement PPGY Technology. This page was generated in 0.270seconds.

  Send to a friend on AIM | Set as Homepage | Bookmark Home | NuTang Collage | Terms of Service & Privacy Policy | Link to Us | Monthly Top 10s
All content � Copyright 2003-2047 NuTang.com and respective members. Contact us at NuTang[AT]gmail.com.