*WAIL* A MOLE!

A molemolemolemolemolemolemolemooooooooole!

I was gazing at my reflection in the mirror (I limit myself to 25 minutes per session - any longer and it just smacks of narcissism) when I realised that I have a mole! It's on the right side of my jaw, which used to be blemish-free! And I'm very sure of my jaw's previous mole-free status because minutes 13-17 are usually allocated to "Jaw (Right)".

What can this possibly mean?

Have my winds of fortune changed? Has my destined Path of Golden Success been diverted into the Path of Holey Socks with this new mole of mine? Is it the beginning of some new skin disease where I'll wake up each morning with a new spot, until my face is finally transformed into a giant mole? WHAT IF IT GROWS BIGGER AND A HAIR STICKS OUT OF IT?!!!

Or maybe...maybe it's *whispers* cancer.

I haven't experienced so many things - I haven't had a statue dedicated to me, an award named after me, ruled over a country with an iron fist... I'm not ready for a life of liquid foods and bedpans!

Sob sob sob. I'm not overreacting. I read that one of the signs of cancer is a change in one's moles. Especially if said mole is a bumpy one.

*Prod*

It IS bumpy!!! I can feel it! It's not just a spotty mole! It's a bumpy, spotty one! I'm gonna die, I'm gonna DIE! Worse, hair is gonna grow out of it! And it hurts! Hang on, that's not right - moles don't hurt.

Oh...it's only a spotty one after all. The bumpy bit's just a zit.

*WAIL* A ZIT!

Categories: Ouch [t]

dun worry.. if anything really really really gonna happen to you.. i will get your epitaph written with my utter sincerity and appreciation of you as a friend.. anyway.. an addition of mole might make you look abit more "cool" then usual.. dun u think so? jaime?
» Fred (130.220.79.98) on 2005-10-03 08:35:28

zit! Got this at one website.. Try la.. It work on me.. ---------------------------------- No! Don't burst it! That's the worst thing you can do! It may solve your problem temporarily so you won't go to that dinner with a large white bud blossoming on your mug, but the scar will remain for a long, long time. Instead, try wrapping an ice cube in a thin muslin cloth and place it for about three minutes on a pimple that is just forming. It kills the growth of the pimple. If a pimple does burst accidentally (or intentionally!), wash the area with soap. Then reach for a lemon slice and squeeze ten drops into a cotton ball. Keep it on the burst pimple for about 10 minutes. The scar will vanish.
» ylang (219.95.4.93) on 2005-10-03 08:54:40

Freddy: As long as you spell my name right on the epitaph...Jaime...I give up

ylang: Lemon juice on an open wound. You're probably right. The scar will vanish...because my skin would've melted.
» theZEBRA on 2005-10-03 09:02:00

the curse of the meme is working.... have you been cumming lately?
» Beer Brat (202.156.6.69) on 2005-10-03 10:25:36

HAH! if it wasn't for me! you would have still thought of it as a freaking cancerous mole! hahahhahahaha! you should pay me money for pointing out the pimple and the mole!
» jase (203.121.0.19) on 2005-10-03 11:11:56

Beer brat: no comment. :p Jase: You were laughing at my cancer scare...in fact, you still are.
» theZEBRA on 2005-10-03 09:14:33

Anyone who panics so badly over a spot obviously doesn't get enough of them. I have NO sympathy! :-p
» Jay (82.69.108.126) on 2005-10-03 09:36:28

Jamie jamie... Someone with an iq of 172, confusing zits for moles... Haih... Jase, maybe we SHOULD go for the IQ test, mebbe we'd get like a 175 or something, judging by jamie.... :P heh
» Joel (130.102.128.60) on 2005-10-03 09:56:44

Hi there - good blog. Had a bit of a read and a laugh. Cheers.
» Shan (60.48.40.28) on 2005-10-04 03:00:47

Jay: Hey, the only way I can hope to find an NM of my own is to have as few spots as possible. It's obviously all your fault - blatantly parading your NMness in front of us NMless ones.

Joanne: The zit's really close to the mole (thankfully, still hair-free and tiny), orright?! Anyone would've made the same mistake!

Spanky: Haha, thanks. I'd like my blog better if I had cross-dressing pirate friends to pose for pics though.
» theZEBRA on 2005-10-04 04:14:42

Hey, you look great. We've seen your pics. A lil mole/zit won't change a thing. Paul
» Paul (218.208.229.201) on 2005-10-04 07:50:57

*blush*
» theZEBRA on 2005-10-04 09:45:51

lol. wat made u think it was a mole?? actually, a sudden change of face feng shui sounds interesting...
» chloe (219.95.63.199) on 2005-10-04 10:33:32

mole makes you sexy ;p
» spybreak (219.95.99.217) on 2005-10-04 10:49:09

eh jamie.. are you saying you want some of us to cross dress as pirates for you??? I SO VOTE FOR JOEL TO DO IT!
» jase (203.121.0.19) on 2005-10-04 10:56:08

Funny la you. And yes, 25 mins on face-inspection is definitely not enough to brand you a narcissist. It's at least an hour each morning, noon and night, and remember, brushing your hair means exactly 250 strokes. And if it was a mole and you let hair stick out of it we'd have no choice but to force you to sit in a kopitiam with one leg up on a stool and have you stroke it all day long while nursing one sole cup of kopi-o.
» Will (219.94.57.127) on 2005-10-04 11:12:44

haha. thanks for making me laugh, and the comment you left me earlier made me feel a LOT better! have a good day, and good luck with those moles... ;o)
» jamie on 2005-10-04 05:25:20

chloe: the zit was right below the mole. I'm still waiting for my lottery strike.

spy: Everything turns you on, *wink*.

jason: i think you'd make a good cross-dressing pirate - you've already got the bitchiness. Hahaha!

Will: Err...*stops stroking her mole*

Jamie: Glad you're feeling better. And stop laughing at dachshunds! Mine's already got low (hee hee) self-esteem as it is.
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