Home | Join! | Help | Browse | Forums | NuWorld | NWF | PoPo   
theZEBRA
just spent the weekend at the army barracks
Is Chewing On
Reading:



Creation
Gore Vidal

Listening to:



Everything in Transit
Jack's Mannequin
Lick Those Stripes!
www.flickr.com
This is a Flickr badge showing public photos from Jamesies. Make your own badge here.
The Herd
Carresser of Annabelle
Crazy Lone Ranger
Dave
Freddy
Island Sinker
Labert Leopard
Laynie
Lego Man
Shakin' That Ass
Sloth Min
Trina
Uber Bitch Jase
Van Ren


<<#?>>


Join One Thousand Bloggers



Songs of the Plains
Family Court

One would be in less danger
From the wiles of a stranger
If one's own kin and kith
Were more fun to be with.

Ogden Nash
Hong Kung Foo Fighting
Tuesday. 8.16.05 12:02 am
Yeah, so I'm back from Hong Kong. HK = hot and sweaty. But not "yummy nekkid guy in my bed" hot and sweaty. Rather, it was "blazing hot sun and limp wet rags for clothes" hot and sweaty. Bad enough HK summers are hotter than hell. What's worse is a frillion people squished into an itty-bitty area. And they all shop at the same place at the same time. Which makes for mass tramplage for lost tourists (i.e. me).

And the waiters...

Waiter: Whaddya want? *Insert HKese accent*
Me: Dude, I just got here. Gimme an English menu cuz I don't read no Chinese.
Waiter: You banana hor! I chop socky you with my Magic Slicing Menu! Haiyah!
Magic Slicing Menu: *Chop sockies*
Me: Desist! I know what I want! I'll have me a bowl of beef noodles with extra beef plzthnx.
Waiter: Eedjut! Everyone knows that there's no beef in beef noodles. It's all intestine and tripe and liver and maybe an eyeball or two if you're lucky.
Me: Rihiiggght. Just gimme a pork chop then.
Waiter: Whatever.
Five Minutes: *Go by*
Waiter: 'Ere. I betcha can't finish this salad bowl-sized beef noodles. *Still in HKese accent*
Salad bowl-sized beef noodles: *Sploshes menacingly*
Me: ...
Waiter: Fine. Don't eat. Whatever. It costs four times as much as it would where you come from anyways. Pay up, bitch.
Me: ...
Waiter: WTF! Exact change! Where's the tip, you cheap skanky hor?! I stab you with my Whirling Chopsticks of Death!
Me: ...

Thank god for the apples the hotel left on the bedside table every evening.

Still, I suppose it was all worth it. Cuz it was in a sprawling HK video store that I finally found Queer as Folk UK seasons 1 and 2. After two years of searching and avoiding delivery charges. Absolutely worth it. Nekkid Aidan Gillen and smushy gay sex (you lads have your lesbians, alright?). Mmmmm...that's hot and sweaty.

Categories:

7 Comments.


Random complement
ROTFL....
» Gypsy (67.68.25.52) on 2005-08-15 04:55:54

Thanks!
Went by your blog and wanted to ask which bar it was, but your blog only likes blogger's err...bloggers. Blogist...lol. Great story tho, looking forward to the next installment *grin*.
» theZEBRA on 2005-08-15 09:18:56

Aiyah die lor, I am also a super banana, cannot read Chinese one. How to go to Hong Kong lidat? That said, here in London a lot of us Malaysians have picked up the HK accent: - com-PIU-tah (computer) - see-tor-peh-lei (strawberry) - cluh-bing (clubbing) Shameful, I know.
» Jay (82.69.108.126) on 2005-08-15 09:48:59

great weather, great service! please, stop showing off.
» dave on 2005-08-16 10:54:21

Queer as Folk? It has gay sex scenes? OMG. I think I found a few of those in my bro's 'secret stash'! What does that mean? Man, I suddenly wished he had lesbian DVDs instead...
» Charming (211.24.0.230) on 2005-08-21 06:16:37

...
Charming: V suspicious isn't it? Lol. The sex depends on the version I guess. The US one's way more graphic and steamy, the UK one has hotter lads and even hotter accents, which make up for its fewer sex scenes. I suggest you nick them from your bro's stash and keep em for yourself.
» theZEBRA on 2005-08-21 10:24:42

You are similar to the expert)))
In a fantastic way! get xanax It is the valuable answer generic tramadol I consider, what is it ? false way. cheap valium In a fantastic way! xenical pharmacy It is remarkable, it is a valuable phrase adipex 37.5 mg 494a80
» Fidel (82.206.129.160) on 2010-09-03 09:23:13

Name.

URL.

[to enter your email, use "mailto:[email protected]"]
Subject.

Comment.

Word verification.

Copy the first 4 characters only.

If you are a member, try logging in again or accessing this page here.

theZEBRA's Weblog Site • NuTang.com

NuTang is the first web site to implement PPGY Technology. This page was generated in 0.237seconds.

  Send to a friend on AIM | Set as Homepage | Bookmark Home | NuTang Collage | Terms of Service & Privacy Policy | Link to Us | Monthly Top 10s
All content � Copyright 2003-2047 NuTang.com and respective members. Contact us at NuTang[AT]gmail.com.