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Mi, I love You
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Mi, happy mother's day!

Let me describe my mother...

She has short and black-grey hair, she has glasses, she has pimpled face, she has the warmest smile, she has a kind heart, she has a pair of gentle hand. She speaks Kiujiu when she was born, she speaks Cantonese when she came to my dad and she speaks Chinese too to her kids. She works hard for my dad, she stands for me, she takes good care of all my family members perfectly so she melts my heart as hard as the hardest rock in the world.

Now let me confess...

Mi, you're my greatest mother in the world. Thank U for all your great forgiveness and loves in this 16 years. You've had a lot of things to worry of this family and I give you my face. You pardon my infantility. You don't scold OR beat me very often, perhaps only 2-3 times since I was born? Yes, really little. You've once told me, I don't mind how people treat me but I must treat people well. I'm sorry. Honestly, I've always found it difficult to get the correct word to say, to tell you, my feelings, I love you.


This is what I want to say, to you tell you since I was a baby,

Aku Cinta Padamu.
No one can replace you!

3:26 PM

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Too Bad
Saturday. 3.28.09 11:16 pm
I hate that!
I told them to do this and I told them not to do that.
But still they do that.
I'm not going to tell you what is that because it strongly disappointed me.

It's usually hard to tell others to do what I want them to do.
I know that is not just belong to me, it's belong to all of us.
But it's actually annoying when you couldn't do what you do expect.

God, that is just an uncomfortable feeling!
You can't understand how do I feel unless you experience it.

So next time, you'd better have spoken to them before you want to do something.
Second, you don't need to put so much hope in it when you're going to do something.
Third, be prepared to endure the pains of failure before and when you're doing something.

That are my points of view.

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Thursday, June 4, 2009
Another friend of mine wasn’t sure of herself and we chatted a little about it last night.

[y] says: You remember before we got discussed about confidence??

Yes! I've always had a motto: Be yourself and this is your world.

[y] says: this motto so difficult to do man~~ u did it?

I think yes, LOL! You know, I always tell myself “be yourself and this is your world” OR I listen to some great music that gives me confidence so I gain more confidence everytime I think I'm going to lose.

[y] says: ehh actually n i gt think why i dun hv confidence n i think is tat reason lol.. u guess what reason.

STRESS! Right?

[y] says: nope stress will make someone feel not confident??

Yes! Don't you know?

[y] says: no i dunno.

If you have stress and you'll certainly can't do things well.

[y] says: oo but not that.

And at last, you feel lost and you're in trouble.

[y] says: oicc but i can tell u not that.


[y] says: u guess.

I don't know. You tell me if you don't mind.

[y] says: physical~ hehe.

I see! I don't even think of your body shape. Why do you mind about that?

[y] says: but i mind lol dunn no.

Oh my god, that isn't a problem! I don't care how people look like as long as he/she has a good heart.

[y] says: but u knw..physical also will affect someone self confident.

Appearance doesn't mean everything girl. OK, one thing that you need to do is just be yourself, you archieve something and you're speacial, so next time people would change their perspective on you.

[y] says: 多多少少也会影响 hopefully~ but u know the world now change d hehe ''JUST BE YOURSELF''

Girl, I can't help you if you think in that way~

[y] says: I LIKE this sentence ehh u oredi help me okay~

Yes, just be yourself. We're still growing, aren't we?

[y] says: i will think in this holiday about ''Appearance doesn't mean everything'' and one thing that you need to do is just be yourself, you archieve something and you're special, so next time people would change their perspective on you. yupp

So your body might pull up every next moment. So your body might pull up every next moment.

[y] says: not understand..

我们还在成长着, 当然我们的身体也在拉长着, 接着我们就变高啦, 身材也变较瘦了.

[y] says: oo~ n muz exercise too.. ^^ so this holiday i try to go jogging hehe

Good idea! Healthy body Health mind :)

[y] says: yupp haha

Do you have your dreams? If yes, think about it now, and bother nothing about people around you, and try to think how to achieve it, just when you step one step closer your dreams, one step you succeed. Eventually, you can kill those who don't like you and think you're just little girl.

[y] says: haha my dream?? u know de.. the boring dream

Dreams never boring instead further.

[y] says: ya..b4 i worry to tell sumone my ambition bcoz i know many ppl will u knw..i dunno y many ppl dun like b a teacher n thy will laugh u know but now i dint worry it i gt tell everyone my anbition

Yes! You did it! You're so confident! That's a good news!

[y] says: Juz this?? haha thank you

Yes! You did something that you didn't dare last time.

[y] says: if i success..i will very thank you you haa


[y] says: haha no la.. dun feel like that actually sometime u oredi help someone u oso dunno.. and ur word..make someone so comfortable.. haha

Well, I just do my part of a friend and give advices to my friends whoever need it and he/she comes out from their own problems has already given me a big thanks.

[y] says: :)

So no need to say very very very very thank you lo :D

[y] says: haaa

My word make you feel uncomfortable? Which one? I take it back XD

[y] says: where gt i said so uncomforable?? i say COMFORTABLE c clearly la.. haha

Oh yes, sorry. LOL! I also hope my words could help people.

[y] says: oredi help a person..

Anyway, I hope my words help you as well :)

I'd like to say I didn't think that I could say such words but I just typed it out whatever I thought at the moment she told me her problem. It was kind of strong, powerful words. Hey! You, OR anyone who's reading this, just do whatever you what and put in your effort and you'll eventuallty see the result.

Be yourself and this is your world.

3:16 PM

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My Extra Class
Saturday. 3.28.09 1:19 pm
Yes... My Erican class started last week. Today was my second day in Level 4 Stage 2. As usual, I carried a bag behind my back and a fail together with another two books walked from my house to the bus station in centre of the town. Although it was no more than 10 minutes, I saw people who were familiar to me. We smiled to each other - this was the basic manners. I smiled, it wasn't a big deal; they smiled to me, I thought it contained other meaning...

Well, my extra class is in Erican, it's an English lesson. But to get there, I spend nearly RM 10 on the bus fare and the way take less than one hour by bus. For a normal student outside the city, it is quite expensive and not necessary.

Perhaps I want to start from saying how and why I would go Erican. I one day said to my mum, I want to learn English! I suddenly had a special thought go study in Erican.

Peopl asked me why did I want to go so far to learn English, weren't there English tuition centres in the town? People asked me about the fee of the lesson and their expressions showed me that thinking I was nuts. People also asked me the timetable, how long did I spend a day there and how many lessons I would have after I paid for that much. For last, does it good / worth to study in Erican? Now, let me tell you, I won't spend my parents' hard earned money on a field I think that's no use. Definitely not - not even on the clothes.

If you want to say it's same class / level / environment as the UK, no - of course. But if you compare Erican with tuition centres in my Tapah dead town under a magnifying glass, I'll certainly say Erican is far better. You know... What I achieve in Erican isn't only the English lessons, as well as tons of extra knowledge outside the world - I learnt how to give a public speech completely in front of audiences, I learnt how to communicate with people in English, I learnt how should I do when I'm meeting new friends - eye-contact, smile, say a Hi...

But still, I'm not a perfect man. I still have to improve myself. A language centre wouldn't make you into a know-it-all, it would only guide you to a certain level and of course, you must put in the efforts yourself - no one has ever achieve greatness by merely sitting at home, waiting for success to knock on their doors. This quote truly explained everything.

I decided to write down this feeling which was deeply unexpressed in my heart two years ago. This write wouldn't help much actually, it wouldn't make people understand why I go Erican, but I just wanted to say it out loud! To tell you I AM NOT WASTING MY TIME AS WELL AS MY PSARENTS' TIME, I AM VERY CLEAR WHAT I AM DOING AT THE MOMENT, NEED NOT YOU TO WORRY ABOUT, AND I DON'T NEED YOUR LAUGHS BEHIND ME, BUT STILL I WANT TO SAY THANK YOU TO YOU BECAUSE YOU MAKE ME A STRONG, INSISTENT MAN EVER.

*To make it more obvious, listen, I'm not defaming any body, I'm trying to prove that I'm not what you're thinking now. This is what I want to say. Thank you for reading.

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Chinese New Year 2009
Monday. 2.2.09 10:04 pm
It was running too fast, one week of holidays and CNY had just slipping away. School was just about reopened today, teachers were starting to give us tons of rubbish works.

2009's CNY was about boring actually. Firstly, I hadn't been to much places although all of my relatives were come back for reunion. I was probably watching TV, sitting and eating around at home. One thing I didn't like was I went to my mum's relatives' there and I was completely scared by my mum when she asked me to stay overnight at their house. I had told my mum NOT TO DO that before we went there, but she let me down at the end.

Secondly, I was unfortunate to fall sick. I wonder why. I just wanted to grow stronger. I ate as much as I can during the CNY. So you know what happened then. I ate too much and got violent indigestion. My stomach was hurt at the beginning. Then I got fever and it took about two days to recover. I want to give a big thank you to my mum as she looked after me for the night. And also my sister, thank you for sending me to the doctor (although he merely gave me advices that I heard since when I was younger and simply rip my RM35 off ). I guess she was quite tired because she had just come back from her university. Thank you! You must read my blog, Janet!

Thirdly, I hadn't received any "red pocket"(it) from my parents and uncles. This is because my grandma had just left us. So based on our Chinese tradition, we can't put any decorations in our house and we can't take it within this year. Honestly, I want it so that I can use it OR make it as a savings since my mum doesn't usually give me pocket money.

As a result, I can feel the CNY mood is getting less each year. I don't think it would be a CNY next year, it might be a year just for reunion.

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Sexual Harrassment
Friday. 4.3.09 1:39 am
Oh my god... I'm still a virgin.
There had a talk about sexual harrassment at my school this morning.
She told us what sexual harrassment was and some examples of it.
And I'm disagree with some of the points.

The first point was, touching of skin between boys and girls. Hey man, I have a touch with a person who is opposite sex with me, I hold her hand, I pat her arm and want to say a hi OR I accidently knocked into a girl... Does that consider sexual harrassment then? If yes, please, kill me, because my classmate always do that on me, so I was no more a virgin NOW.

The second point, starring at someone who has different sex with someone. She said, this is sexual harrassment, next gave us two examples. "That girl is stunning. What a handsome guy." Oh my god... I know Malaysian is kind of conservative, but that has already beyonded the limit! If her saying is true, many people out there has become a pervert and over million of people on the earth has unconsciously become a sexual victim, I believe.

These are the points for as long as I can remember. I think it is unreasonable, very. There's no point to say it's sexual harrassment just by touching the opposite sex's skin. To my astonishment, the second point is just rubbish. You don't say it's sexual harrassment, it's how a normal person would say if they see a nice-looking person. We are human... aren't we? She alien!

And she showed us some videos too - some videos about people abandoned their babies. They abandoned their baby under a tree, beside the road and let him/her face the cold wind and heavy rain. I have a question, why do people like to give birth to a baby who they don't want to take care of? I understand, especially teenagers, like me, the majority of them are curious about sex and they would have sexual urge. However, do they think about those miserable, abandoned babies? NO! They just want to do it when they feel they want to and I've hated this kind of unresponsible bastard so much, I can't explain how much in a few words... I really can't!

I'd like to say,
Don't damage people' life,
Don't harm the ladies,
Don't kill the babies.
Condoms, birth control pills are used to control birth.
So make use of them, don't abuse them.

Last but not least, I really don't understand, why do people expect sex so much?
They can have sex with their wife/husband once they get married over hundreds times in their whole life and nobody could catch them. Just let go of the unmarried.

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