You already know...

Pep talks with Moe rawk.
Feeling like this year's biggest idiot is beyond welcomed to me. Anyone can encourage, my friends. It takes a friend of true character and value to say things like they are, no games or pats on the back or nothin'! I often need people to point out the things I think I see to know that they're real. In specific faults and problems.
I've always had this constant fear that I'm crazy or mentally retarded or something. Once as a child, I convinced myself that there was this big conspiracy and that's why people often treated me so nicely. I didn't think I should of been treated worse or anything. I guess I just thought people were too fake, and figured it was because it had to do with me. Even when I was around 15 or so, I remembered that I used to go to a counselor at school in Wisconsin and I decided to ask my mom about it. She said it was because they wanted to make sure I got aclimated to such a drastic change (from being born in Mexico, to living in a borded town of Texas, to less-than-a-thousand-people Green Lake Wisconsin). But I still thought I was insane and that everyone pretended I wasn't so I wouldn't get upset or go crazier or something... I was an odd child, huh?
So, nevertheless, to this day I often feel the need for someone to point out what it is that I see, so I make sure I'm not nuts. Moe does that perfectly. Heck, she goes beyond that. My favorite moment was when she was speaking entirely too loudly in Walmart about some incidents that happened. Heck, I'll say it. Sex that I had with someone that I shouldn't have had. It was a ridiculously stupid thing. Heck stupid is WAY of an understatement. Well, as she spoke of all of this, quite upset at me, in loud tones, I kept getting nervous and embarassed. Later we went to a gas station, I asked her not to do it again. She said she wouldn't, but "Here's a thought, if you can't speak of it in public, it's probably an indecent deed you did." And then it hit me. ...duh. If you can't talk about it in public, you shouldn't do it. Something I already knew, but forgot.

There's a hole in my head, I know it! Everything I know, everything I've learned, my memories, my LIFE... leak out.
Drip,
drip,
drip...

She does have a point.
She's kind of hardcore.... :)
» Helena on 2007-01-02 02:20:37

How it ends
will ALWAYS remind me of you.
» Helena on 2007-01-02 02:31:55

Haha, me, too. Always in one ear and out the other. I'm with you, bro. ;)
» Silver-dot- on 2007-01-02 11:16:51

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