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dave
Age. 41
Gender. Male
Ethnicity. Chinese
Location Valley Village, CA
School. Cornell Univ
» More info.
The Soft & Moist Peach
296th day of 2006
Man, I was so hungry. A Chinese newspaper diet is not only totally unfulfilling, but gives me massive diarrhea, thus leaving me hungrier and weaker than I was previously.

Anyway, in a frantic fit of hunger... I opened my fridge hoping that, by some strange chance of great fortune, I were to find some food (instead of empty shelves filled w/ Chinese newspapers).

Much to my surprise, I opened up one of those little drawers and found a peach inside. The peach was very soft and moist, and had a darkish hue that was unbecoming of a peach. It must've been in there for 2 months. Seriously.



Well, anyway, I am now eating that peach. I feel very nervous--not to mention nauseous. Each bite is taken with great caution, as my weakened taste buds search for any signs of grotesque flavors. Wish me luck! If I fall asleep tonight never to awaken again, after poisoning myself with toxic peach poisons, please... I beseech you!... please, tell my wife that I'm sorry.

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All content copyright by dave. Please do not reproduce, recycle, or regurgitate without the express written consent of the CTU.
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Recommended by 2 Members
Kuri writergirl20
12 Comments.


O_O;;; im extremely worried about you and your eating habits ^^;; =PPP

i must admit it's very amusing though XD

L8r,

—×Kuri×—
» Kuri on 2006-10-23 03:54:16

At least you're biting into a peach, rather than lapping up a gooey peach puddle.
» theZEBRA on 2006-10-23 05:58:22

You stupid fool.
Keep doing stuff like that and Papagoya will need to find someone else to keep feeding him. But if YOU ate that...what are the poor baboons eating??
» etheracide on 2006-10-23 07:14:53

I like the...
white little spheres against the orange-brown skin.

You have a wife? Introduce her sometime. I'm sure she's a real peach.
» Silver-dot- on 2006-10-23 04:05:38

Dave, it's ok, the secret's out
We all know you sold her favortie underpants for the sake of nuTang. On second thought, maybe US apologising isn't a good idea
» middaymoon on 2006-10-23 05:00:50

Wow. That is truly disgusting.
» randomjunk on 2006-10-23 06:09:26

thanks for the comment!
yeah writing sucks. im majoring in nursing 8)
» your_punkrock_princess on 2006-10-24 05:04:01

i saw the screen shot from the recommendations
promo. just noticed that you had some very intersting programs up on your computer. :)
» middaymoon on 2006-10-24 04:35:48

uck thats gross
i am sure that peach has to be all kinds of moldy and nastyif not then that is a mutant peach or something
» truedesire on 2006-10-24 07:30:23

Woah, maybe tomorrow you'll wake up with super powers?

A Chinese newspaper diet might leave you kinda dehydrated as well.
» sarah on 2006-10-25 12:47:45

That is scary and I thought college students ate worse *shakes head*.
» writergirl20 on 2006-10-25 02:16:16

omigosh were you really eating that peach? O___o;;;;; I hope your stomach is ok.
» razzly on 2006-10-28 10:31:14

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