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dave
Age. 41
Gender. Male
Ethnicity. Chinese
Location Valley Village, CA
School. Cornell Univ
» More info.
The Mighty Blister of Fetupia
204th day of 2005
I woke up this morning with a blister the size of Mars on my neck. I'm not even joking. Okay, maybe that was a bit of an exaggeration, but seriously.. this shit was huge!

I had to go to the toolshed in the backwoods to find an old machete to cut this sucker off. I'm not even joking. You probably think I'm crazy for doing that, but if you saw this blister, you would've realized my first and last resort was this machete.

So anyway, when I cut off this puss-filled planet, thousands of fetuses gushed out. Torrents! There were fetuses of humans, of pigs, of leprechauns, oh dear goomph, even of Brazilian ostriches. I'm not even joking!

Twenty years later, these fetuses have all developed into mature human beings, even the pigs. They formed a society fostered on the principles of equality, transformation, and I'm not even joking. Their first president, Dr. Dokktir Ducktarr, was a man who spoke with great conviction. I had the pleasure of attending his inauguration. His first words were "I am not a real doctor," and I believe him. The integrity in his voice was just undeniable. I'm not even joking. It was undeniable. Undeniable!

All content copyright by dave. Please do not reproduce, recycle, or regurgitate without the express written consent of the CTU.
Rate this entry!
7 Comments.


i believe you. and that is my favorite toy. i love it so much!!! (j/k)
» zero_jak on 2005-07-24 01:31:39

Haha. The first two paragraphs I totally bought. Shit!!!!!1!!
» juiCyy on 2005-07-24 05:48:09

Hmm...
So your blister was able to conceive? Wow...how amazing. You should call Ripley's Believe It Or Not. Maybe they'll do an expose.
» little-b on 2005-07-24 05:18:57

poll results so far: 1. 2. III 3. IIII 4. III
» zero_jak on 2005-07-25 04:01:59

hey, do you know how to put a music video on your website? i saw someone's (seewun) page with it and i wanted to do the same with mine.
» zero_jak on 2005-07-25 05:47:15

sweet, thanks.
» zero_jak on 2005-07-25 05:56:54

Popularity Points
dave, I had around 200 popularity points... now all of a sudden I only have 12 points... What The Heck happened
» Such_A_Babeh_Face on 2005-08-03 04:41:38

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