With the release of the Twilight movie, I thought I'd just share with everyone some of the best critiques of the Twilight series.


Why Bella is a joke:

Mary Sue (aka Bella Swan) is a character of impossibility. She's completely ordinary, finds that she doesn't relate well with other humans. What was that? She's accepted to a table at lunch with a clique right away? And she suddenly has 5 different guys falling head over heels for her, 2 of which are mythical beasts who are ALSO incredibly hot.

Bella's care for her family isnonexistent.
Sure, she doesn't want the vampires to hurt them. But again, they're just like her disposable friends. Throw them away once you're done with them. Yes children, that's how we treat our friends! Let's all be like Bella! And remember kids, never call your parents "mom" and "dad"! That's Charlie and Ren�e to you!

May I mention that Bella is a complete bitch?
She cries, cries a little more, hugs her abusive boyfriend, and gets what she wants. Her dad buys her a car, and what does Bella think? Crap, my dad's buying me a car. OMFG! I love it!Yeeeeeeeeah. She also claims that she loves Alice like a sister, yet brushes her off and hates to do anything that Alice enjoys. Some friend. Can't even have any dreams besides her wonderful vampire boyfriend. -.-


Now onto Edward:

Perfect guy? I don't think so. Does Edward possibly have a personality? Well, he's exhibited signs of some knowledge in the field of sarcasm, and some talent at playing the piano. Wow. There's enough personality there to make up for all the Mario characters combined! Edward's only known traits are the fact that he's hot, smart, and everything a girl could wish for. Besides a sense of humor, of course.

Edward is also the biggest control freak in the universe of Fiction. When Bella wants to say goodbye to her dad (in her own not so original way), he says:"You have fifteen minutes. Do you hear me? Fifteen minutes from the time you cross the doorstep."
So our ever-perfect Edward Cullen is demanding his ever-perfect girlfriend to haul ass and ditch her father? Yup. I sure hope everyone who wants a boyfriend like him gets one. Then they'll see how much fun it is to have an uber sexy guy who stalks you and tells you what to do. It's sad how many people like him.


True love?

I know plenty of people have realized it, but their relationship is lust, not love. Have they ever shared a conversation that wasn't about Bella's safety or asking nosy questions? No. They claim that they love each other more than anything, but they usually just talk about how hot the other is. Beautiful Swan and Beautiful Cullen. Edward and Bella get married for the same reason as Romeo and Juliet. Lust. Of course, Romeo and Juliet had an ending that was worth knowing.And they didn't have a magic kid. After Bella and Edward get married, their goal should be to get know each other more and spend time with with their daughter, right? Wrong again. They spend their nights doing it and spend the day using up all the idiotic sappy phrases Meyer thinks of. Wow, that sounds like fun!


So get a life, because falling in love with a beautifully uninteresting fictional vampire just shows how superficial you really are.

(PS. Please don't contribute my dislike to the Twilight Series to "omg, you ToTaLlY h8 it just cuz EDWARD omfg is just so HAWT and cuz Kelly likes him n ur just SO jealous!" For your information, Kelly actually isn't obsessed about how HAWT Edward is.)

(PPS. Best Twilight fanfic I've ever read.)

I must digress; though I seem hateful towards Meyers, I'm not. Her writing, while not close to prodigious, is decent and conveys much emotion. I respect her, for having the balls to write professionally.

Wikipedia: "Mary Sue, sometimes shortened simply to Sue, is a pejorative term used to describe a fictional character who plays a major role in the plot and is particularly characterized by overly idealized and hackneyed mannerisms, lacking noteworthy flaws, and primarily functioning as wish-fulfillment fantasies for their authors. Perhaps the single underlying feature of all characters described as "Mary Sues" is that they are too ostentatious for the audience's taste, or that the author seems to favor the character too highly. The author may seem to push how exceptional and wonderful the "Mary Sue" character is on his or her audience, sometimes leading the audience to dislike or even resent the character fairly quickly; such a character could be described as an "author's pet"."

Sorry, guys, but this was my last post. I'm now at my new site, http://zivyleague.blogspot.com, so feel free to come check me out. It's mostly going be tailored to students looking to get into American Universities... so.

Categories: Twilight [t], Stephanie [t], Meyer [t], Teen [t], Fiction [t], Critique [t], Lame [t], Life [t]

Dude... I may not like Isabella Swan that much but don't associate the character with the actress please, they're different.

I may not like the movie but I love the books. The books is to show that regardless how perfect it seems, nothing is perfect. Not even Edward or Bella. I thought it is widely accepted to be calling your parents by their names over there?
» Nuttz on 2008-11-25 01:52:22

hahahha i like u....
» jolenesiah on 2008-11-25 02:29:41

My friend got so upset at school since everyone is starting to read the book & get all OMG, TWILIGHT THIS & THAT, OMG but she claims that she was the first person, or ONE of the first people to read it & has something that proves that she has before the book has even been published. lol, i'm pretty annoyed by everyone talking about it too, but i'm not into it though.
» ShaShaBoo on 2008-11-25 05:24:56

Some people enjoy the series because it's an escape from a mundane life.

Sure it's cheesy and the writing is bad. But I sit at a fucking desk all week long and enjoy reading crap fantasy at the end of the day. Okay, the movie is shit. Does that mean I shouldn't enjoy the prettiness of Robert Pattinson or the two hour escape from life it has to offer?

It's fine all good and to dislike Twilight, but is it really necessary to be so hateful and cynical?
» Chloefoxx on 2008-11-25 02:03:51

Mary Sue
And that's precisely why I never can, and never will, get into Twilight
» bluetopaz on 2008-11-25 05:54:37

well i got nothing to bitch about this book since i haven't read or watch twilight!
» renaye on 2008-11-26 01:18:56

Finally!
Someone sees the truth!
» elessar257 on 2009-09-12 06:40:38

So read the book and watched the movies. I think everything you said about them is true. And Edward is a stalker. I mean, he did just appear in her room and stand there watching her sleep for several months before he even knew if she was into him. But I found them entertaining and I only hated Bella about 2/3 of the time.
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