Tomorrow, I only have one class, and then I get to help choose our eleven new employees AAAHHHHH

I have my fingers crossed for some people. We had some really magnificent applicants.

We had this discussion, in Spanish, today, on sexism and gender-charged job titles. I was astounded at the general female reaction in the class.

It went something like this: Eh, whatever.

Okay, I'm sorry, but if you don't want to live in a world where your daughters, nieces, students, or other little girls grow up with the idea that their worth is in their bodies and their domestic abilities, you need to start actually thinking about this stuff. This doesn't just fix itself, simply because the country becomes more progressive. We perpetuate what we learn as adults.

So basically, it's time to stop being fine with it.

Also, my professor seems to think that you can't hate your last name and still not want to change it to your spouse's.

Uhh.

I hate my last name a lot. My plan was kinda always to just change it to something when the opportunity came about. I don't want to take a spouse's, though. That, to me, is saying that marriage fundamentally changes a woman where it doesn't change a man.

Anyway that's it.

A woman in my writing group and her husband both hated their last names, so they changed them both when they got married. I thought it was a really interesting solution. They get to have the same last name, but neither of them is adopting the other's name.
» randomjunk on 2013-02-21 09:24:36

I wasn't aware that you felt so strongly about it.
» middaymoon on 2013-02-21 11:30:27

About not taking a husband's last name.
» middaymoon on 2013-02-22 12:30:24

I would say no, because the guy is like 100% gelled-hair jerk material. (I gave up swearing for Lent or I would use a stronger word). I spent the whole meeting trying to figure out what made him exude jerk-vibes while the guy from finance was exuding "marry me immediately" vibes. Unfortunately the guy from finance was already married with two kids, because, of course, he is so marriageable. But yeah. There's a part of you that just wants to go for drinks with slick, jerkface guys because you know exactly what to expect and you can tell your friends about it afterwards.

So you think they should get rid of stuff like 'actress', or 'poetess'? In french we have all that kind of stuff still lingering around. I'm a "chercheuse" for example, instead of a "chercheur". I like how our language doesn't have lots of gendered nouns, it makes it so much easier.

I decided that when I get married I'll change my name to my husband's name (unless it is terrible), but I'll still publish under my maiden name. I want to have the same name as the children. You could do the Spanish thing and just tack names on the end ad infinitum.

I had a friend who got married and his wife kept her name. The first wedding anniversary is the "paper" anniversary, so he got her these gorgeous origami flowers. She handed him a dirty, folded piece of paper and he was like, "What?!" but then he opened it and it was the paper saying that she'd changed her last name to his. He was so touched that he was going to cry. That's when I was like, "awwwww I think I will change my name."
» Zanzibar on 2013-02-22 03:50:09

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