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Let Me Guide You


Age. 34
Gender. Female
Ethnicity. A European Medley!
Location Radomyshl, Ukraine
School. Seattle Pacific Univ
» More info.
A Tweeting Twitter Twit, I am.

September 2022

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You Can Dance If You Want To
or im me

For My Peeps

I just thought you should know...
This site is certified 85% GOOD by the Gematriculator
Damnit... I can't understand these people
Tuesday. 8.19.03 7:19 pm
I'm listing to Chicane! And you know what that means! Thats right! I'm in a state enlightened peace u_u ::ohms:: and for good reason... I've come to a very interesting part in my book AND I am currently making a huge step in my spiritual life.

I am, right here and right now, about to state what has been growing to a point in my mind for the past few years- I no longer see the Christian religion as the one true faith. In fact, I plan to leave my church for a period of study and meditation. Hopefully I shall, in this time, figure things out for myself completely.

::sigh:: Now I plan to lapse into the state of guilt and confusion which inevitably faces one who has been raised toward a certain ideaology and plans to abandon it.

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Sunday Bloody Sunday
Sunday. 11.9.03 3:42 pm
n_n I just finished reading The Catcher in the Rye, nd ya know what I found out? I'm a lot like the main chracter, Holden Caulfield. So, for the benefit of those who have not read the book (and the amusement of those who have), I shall write todays entry as if I am Holden! ...with slightly better grammar of course... ::ahem:: here goes-

Sunday is the worst day of the week. No kidding, I really hate Sundays. Sunday's the kind of day that makes you feel completely worthless, like you'll never be happy again. Weekend's all spent, and everything's quiet, all day. No kidding, no goddam person says a word all day. I can't help but think about everything I don't like to, because there's nothing else to do.

My parents make me go to this church with them, way the hell out in Des Moines. Boy it's a terrible place, really, I can't stand it at all. It's not that I'm not religious, because I am, really. But the whole place is filled with the worst phonies. There's all these ladies in stylish dresses and hats that act all pious while they gossip about so-and-so's problems with her son. Goddam it's terrible. Phonies like that just drive me up the wall.

Then every second Sunday of the month (like today) I have to work in the 3-year-old's nursery. Don't get me wrong, I love little kids to death, I really do, that's why I volunteered. But it's just depressing after a while, all these little girls whose mum's don't bother to iron their little dresses right and don't brush their cowlicks all out. Boy it's shit, no kidding. And these are the same mum's who've got these perfectly polished boots on and act phony with the other dames.

Today was even more depressing, because I had to tell the really tired lady who runs all this stuff that I can't work in the nursury anymore. My parents want to move us to a new church, seeing as they're beginning to catch on about all the phonies and stuff. Now that it comes time, I don't really want to go. It's like, I know everything about the place, and there's no where better. Same amount of phonies at every damn Cristian church.

Goddam, I need a drink

So thats it, thats me hating Sundays... like Holden... I should write a book...

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so unimpressed, but so in awe
Saturday. 12.18.04 10:45 pm
Wow. I'm really feeling pathetic right now. My best friend went out with some people today without me, which should be just fine with me, but she's not home yet! I stopped by (because I'm crazy and possesive) five hours after she left and no one even knows where she is. I need to talk to someone.

Realizing that I'm clinically insane and I need more friends, I went to the bookstore. Wow! books solve everything! Now not only have I spent my Saturday ALL ALONE, but I am depressed because I do not live in a fantasy world. Perfect. I shouldn't be left alone. I'm scary.

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Wanna Know Something?
Wednesday. 5.23.07 12:47 am
I used to debate competatively.

No, I wasn't stunningly good (according to the judges, hee hee), but you learn a lot from being put through the old wringer. Forget what your mama told you and please benefit from the wisdom I have gathered.

1. Rapid-fire speech is a skill to be cultivated, not a habit to be overcome.But it's still important to annunciate and be clear.

2. The best defense is a good offense. Think three moves ahead, always.

3. The best offense is a good defense. Make that sucker look like an idiot, and you've got it made.

4. Tail sources. Where you get your information is everything.

5. A good suit and a sincere compliment don't make up for stupidity. But they sure do help if you've got all your other shit together.

6. Smile, Smile, Smile. Confidence doubles credibility. Fake it until you feel it.

7. There is no absolute truth. Both sides can be defended equally well.

I take #7 to heart, which is probably why I get in so much trouble. I will fight with anyone, anytime, over anything, and I will win... or at least get you into a confusing stalemate :).

So, try me sometime. Give me a case with an obvious solution. I guarantee to make your head spin.

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Home Alone III
Wednesday. 7.4.07 5:50 pm
Sometimes she is called the Innocent. Other times she is called the Beautiful Soul or the Pure Heart. She is the Brave Warrior's other half. She is a beloved archetype.

I speak of Penelope, Andromakhe, and Cleopatra. She is strong, capable, but above all, faithful. Can you see her yet?

What if I called her an Army Wife.

Lately her image has been following me around everywhere. On Monday, I watched "We Were Soldiers," which is a great movie, punctuated by sad scenes of weeping women who have just learned that their men will not be returning home.

The next day, after work, I come home, turn on the TV, and there's a black and white about a bunch of Air Force officers and their wives on a base in Japan during the Korean War. Now I realize this film was made in the sixties, but I could hardly believe it when one of the vetran wives intimates to a newcomer:

"There's hardly any quarreling here... Our motto is 'keep 'em happy, because you don't know if they'll be back."'

No. You know what? That's not how it works.

I'm probably going to ruffle some feathers here, especially since it's the fourth of July, but soldiers are not special. I've dated my share of them, and almost married one. They are grunts. Whether they are "good people" is dependent upon their personality and actions, not their service status.

Even so, I can't come up with a single culture that doesn't revere the Warrior, and by proxy, the Innocent. Watch the news sometime. When they want to effect your sentiment about the "military action" in Iraq, they use the Innocent.

When they want you to hate the war, she's a crying widow.

When they want you to love the war, she's a proud matriarch, full of hope.

Ok, maybe none of this makes any sense, but it's a very raw sentiment of mine.

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Who Needs Spring?
Tuesday. 7.10.07 4:12 pm
I suppose I didn’t mention, Sunday, the event that caused me to find my camera. I decided to Clean. Yes, you read right. When I Clean, this is not like your usual tidying or rearranging. This is epic, Depeche Mode-style cleaning.

Usually, I’m a pig and a packrat, but every summer, I pop a half dozen anti-histamines (I’m allergic to dust) and Clean. I pick a spot in my room, move everything from that spot out onto the lawn, scrub it down, and put all the good stuff back.

This year’s victim: the area where my bed is.

It’s funny how much stuff you accumulate when you don’t have to look at it.

Personally, I tend to hoard fabric scraps and old magazines.

This is what I mean by Clean.

Yesterday, I sorted through the crap on the lawn, and did a lot of laundry. I still smell like All.

Other cool things I found:

My missing rockstar earring
This dress I made back when I was obsessed with LOTR
Lots of thumb tacks

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