Dang, that really sux. I was playing tag with a little kid in the park, and I tripped over him, and it dislocated my knee...again. I had fun though yesterday, we went to some concert thingie and watched the firecrackers for like 10 minutes. well I have to go, I'll make this longer later. Ok, I'm back, and can write again so heres what happened, I was at the park and one of the little kids came up to me and said "you're it!" So I started chasing him saying, "hey why not, it's the fourth of july, I'm out of school, I'm off of work tomorrow, why not have some fun." So I started chasing him, but when I got to the bottom of the hill I took a wrong step and twisted my knee out of place. Other than that, I've been having a pretty good time. I have to go to work tomorrow, but thats ok, because I get paid around $500 dollars a month, so thats pretty cool. Well I'll see ya'll later, and get this posted.

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Morpheus

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I am so happy now. Today has to be the greatest monday of my life so far. I got back from school with no homework, when I went to work, they just said to go home because they didn't need me, so I came home and played Metroid Prime, I found out that nutang is no longer blocked on my computer, and I started thinking of stuff to write in it, then I found out that I will only have to pay 642 dollars instead of what I thought would be 3,000 dollars to go to Japan this summer, the aforementioned 642 dollars may seem like a lot of money to go to Japan for 2 months, and it may not even be that much, it may only be 142 dollars. The cost is as follows, Passport: 107 dollars, Program contribution if I get selected for 2 of the 4 scholarships that requires a contribution: 500 dollars, application fee: 35 dollars. If the cost is 142 dollars, I can make the payment and tuition in 1 paycheck, but if the cost is 642 dollars, then I'll need to save up about 5 or 6 paychecks. Some of you may be questioning why I'm going to Japan, I've been working during the last month on becoming a foreign exchange student to Japan, becuase the entire way of life of the Japanese people just absolutely amazes me. I still have one major stumbling block in my way though. Insurance. I need both a medical and dental policy, and I thought I had found one, but it only covered the first 30 days, then after 30 days, the rate jumps up 5 dollars per day. That wouldn't be so bad if, say I were only staying in Japan for 30-40 days, but after the 40th day, the cost instead of being 185 dollars like the site proclaimed is now 235 dollars, and by the end of the trip, it is 285 dollars, which exceeds my allowed budget by about 100 dollars for insurance. I will call the foreign exchange company tomorrow to see what they think would be a good route to take for insurance. I'm so excited about this. It blows my mind that God has set this in my path. Well, I can't think of anything else to write about. So, I'll write again later. C-ya then, and I'm still sorry it's been so long since I've updated.

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morpheus

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I've been feeling very motivated the past few days. I'm using this motivation to start a workout routine. Hopefully, I'll have the discipline to keep at it when I lose my motivation. Yesterday, and the day before I walked 20 minutes each. Today I walked for 20 minutes again, did 20 standing calf raises and plan on mowing the lawn once my landlord brings over a lawnmower. That should be fun :D

Hopefully, I can maintain this motivation and have it seep over into my Japanese skills too. I'm definitely getting better. I was listening to an online Japanese radio station yesterday, and they played a song I really liked. By listening closely and typing in the lyrics on Google, I was able to find the song. It's called "NEO UNIVERSE" by L'Arc en Ciel. It's sounds pretty good. Here's the song if anyone is interested:



At this point, I'm going to try and read a chapter on textfugu until my landlord brings by the lawnmower, then I'll get the front yard mowed. I'm hoping to get the twins to clean up house today, I'm going to hound them until it's clean. Hopefully if I keep it up, they'll get something done.

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Wow, I was out mowing the lawn, and while I was doing that, the twin that was awake decided to start cleaning up the kitchen. Nice!

Mowing the lawn was kind of fun. It's something I haven't had to do since I was at Boys Ranch back in 2005. That was right before I went to Japan. That brought back a lot of good memories. And reminded me about how much I suck at mowing the lawn. Fun times :D

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Well since I have another journal and i wont be writing in this one anyone can use this to comment on my modules!

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watching: nothing
listening to: Ameno By Era
mood: Kinda Happy
You wanna look at my journal its Here. have fun!
LOL!

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Man, I really hate contacts, they always fall out no matter what you're doing. Today and yesterday at work, my new contacts fell out like 6 times in a row. Yeah, I'm pretty mad at them, so I decided to wear my glasses. I'm working pretty hard at finding a forum to post about nutang in, but every time I find one they delete my posts. Well, I decided that I wasn't going to deal with that, so I just gave up. So much for PPS though. I ended up redesigning my site just a little bit. I like harrington font so I decided I'd put a little of it in here. I had a lot, but it got to hard to read. Well, I'll talk to you all later.

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morpheus

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I have been offline for a long time. I really have. Who knew when I last updated about all the shenanigans that I'd get into? It's been almost 18 months since I was last here. Let's see what's happened during that time:

• Still haven't learned Japanese
• Stopped going to school
• Lost or quit multiple jobs
• Survived the end of the world on 12-21-12! (Yay, at least I've got that going for me.)
• Moved across the country again

That last one was widely considered to be a bad move. I moved with my mother, younger sister, and older sister from West Virginia back to Texas. Shortly after, my older sister moved again to another state, so she's not here anymore. In her place, my two younger brothers (who are twins) have come into the equation. I get so mad at them pretty much all the time. They tear up everything they come into contact with, and are pretty much the age of a 7 year old mentally. (At least they act that way all the time.)

It's like they didn't learn the lessons that people learn as they grow up. They didn't learn how to clean up after themselves, or how money works, or the number of months in a year or anything like that. They may not actually be retarded, but there is definitely not much going on in their little noggins. I wish I could help them, but any time I try and get them to think about what they're doing, whether it be cleaning up after themselves or not spending every last bit of money we have on cigarettes or any other myriad of little obvious things, I automatically become the authority figure in their lives. They resent authority. They're always ranting about how "Obama's gonna take away our guns!" or "The government's gonna take over!" I get angry at that. I asked them to tell me what it means for the government to take over, and they couldn't tell me. They honestly have no clue. They just know it's bad.

I want to be able to help them, but I can't. They shut me out any time I suggest anything, and they refuse to do anything I ask them, unless I can make them think it's their idea. I've managed to do that once actually. They were eating too much food last week. Since we're really low on money, we don't have a bunch of food stockpiled. We have to eat very strict meals, 3 times per day. Like normal people. No grazing on chips or crap like that between meals. Only they didn't understand that. They think it's okay to eat whenever they want, whatever they want and just leave the extras laying around the house. I got fed up with this, after having to skip breakfast three days in a row because there wasn't anything to eat for breakfast. So I made sure that when I was preparing supper, I got the first serving. I made sure they saw how big it was, and I made sure I took my time eating it. I really enjoyed it, it was a nice meal. Anyways, they noticed how much I got, but how little they got and started griping about it. When I finished eating I said, "sorry none of us got much guys, we are starting to run out and have to eat less to make sure we've got food until next time we have money." Since then, they've only been eating twice per day, and we all get enough at each meal. I still wake up to an absolutely destroyed kitchen that I have to clean up each time, but it's better than an absolutely destroyed kitchen and no food.

I've pretty much fucked up my life from the plan I laid down back in July of 2007. I wish I had been able to stick to the plan, but I couldn't. I guess it's normal though, who plans their life at age 18 and expects it to actually work out that way? I'm working on getting over it, but it's hard sometimes. Especially when I think about how I could be living my dream right now, working in Japan and teaching English. Now I'm living in a trailer house teaching my two retarded brothers to clean up after themselves.

I know this entry was kind of sad, and I'm not like this all the time. I just had to get this crap off of my chest. I'll be back to normal ol' cheerful me sometime soon. Well, enough procrastinating, I've got a paper to write.

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So, I watched doctor who today. It was pretty nice. Journey to the Center of the Tardis. I liked it. It helped me lighten up a bit.

I got really worked up today, trying to get my younger twin brothers to clean house and look for jobs. I actually got them to fill out applications, and even got one to help me take out trash. If these two were actually 7 years old, that would be awesome. Since they happen to be 19, it's pretty sad that I should have to harp on them so much. I've wondered how we can get some kind of help for them, but they refuse to go to psychiatrists, refuse to believe that they need medication, and refuse to understand that they actually are having problems that they need help.

They're good kids. They just have problems. Sometimes I just lose my temper with them. If I were a psychiatrist or psychologist, or knew anything about psychology I wonder if maybe I could help them.

Sorry for the sour entries, I'll try and lighten these things up at some point.

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