Oh man. Tonight, I think, has been worse for me than any other night. He actually came up to the break room and we talked, alone, for a good 10 minutes. He never goes to the break room! He's got an office of his own to go to ... but I was up there and he came up there and we talked. Gah!

I keep trying to tell myself that it was just a coincidence; that he was just up there to get a soda and was being nice by staying and talking to me. He talks to most people... It's all in my head. I have to keep telling myself this so that I'm not deluding myself in to thinking there's something there that isn't.

However, I'm completely acknowledging the fact that my heart skipped a couple beats when I saw him come up the stairs and again when we were the only two in the room. It does the same thing whenever he gets close to me ... like tonight when he was helping the cashier behind me ... it took everything in me not to turn around and watch what he was doing. He's off the next two nights, which makes me sad and happy at the same time. I won't have to worry about being distracted, but I do enjoy the distraction. And the interactions.

I have to calm down about this, but seriously ... it's driving me nuts. There has to be something about him that I can use {other than the fact that he's my manager} to deter these wild thoughts. He's single, within the 10 year gap I'm allowing myself for dating potential, owns his own house, I'm assuming has a car, is financially stable. There has to be something. It's gonna really bum me out when I find out what it is, but it's for the better.

If there isn't anything, then I have to at least wait until December. I need this job for my vacation, but once that's over, I will probably not voice my opinions.

Other than me going of my mind, the day was fairly uneventful. I'll have the rest of this week and in to next week to relax and get my mind back under control since he's off the next two days and I'm off the next four days after that.

I'm definitely looking forward to sleeping in tomorrow and the next day. I must go grocery shopping tomorrow and I'm really thinking I'll do so at Trader Joe's. I haven't gone shopping there for a while and I have some extra money from this last paycheck so I should be okay. Besides, since I've already put it off this long, I only have to buy food to last me a week and a half rather than two weeks.

It'll be really nice sleeping in tomorrow. My alarm is already turned off.

Until then. . .

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