I'm lacking in motivation today. I just want to stay in bed the whole day. You know what the only problem I see with this is? I'll have trouble getting to sleep before work tonight. And even that's not a very big problem. I'll just go to work tired and sleep when I get home tomorrow. It's not like I have shit to do anyway.

The mood I'm in today is not a good one. I'm not completely uncaring, but it's pretty damn close.

I see absolutely nothing good that will come from today. I'm broke, bored, alone and frustrated. Not a good combination. Which is probably why I'm completely unmotivated. I feel like if I do go out, it either won't be worth it because nothing interesting or worthwhile will occur. Or something completely fucked up will happen and I'll feel even more like shit afterward.

I'm not happy right now. I'm moody and likely to snap at anything. You know what makes this worse? It's not even a debate whether to turn my phone off to avoid people because no one is going to call me. No one ever calls me. At least not anyone that I'd care to talk to. And when they do call, it's either conversations that last 2 minutes or less or they have nothing good to say.

I've wanted to be reckless over the last few days, but my lack of motivation is even keeping me from wanting to do that. I'm just not seeing the point. I'm giving up. For today at least. The whole day I'm just going to remain in this mood. You know what? Yes, part of me is actually wanting to stay this way today. I'm purposely going to keep my attitude like this.

Fuck the world. At least for today.

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