Recovering from a broken heart is not easy. Even if you've been through it once or twice before, you might recover faster, but it's still not an easy process. The person who caused you to have a broken heart will not be affected the same way because it is they who chose the ending/change in your lives. You didn't chose it so it's naturally going to be harder.

Yesterday I had to do something that hurt. It hurt me to talk about it and I did get upset, but it was hurting me more by not saying anything. By not doing anything to change the pain I was going through.

I'd rather have not been through any of this at all, but I'm slowly working on becoming better. And by saying out loud things that bother me and by doing something to change them, I'm becoming a better person. Rather than just shrugging off the pain and getting more and more hurt by simply not doing anything.

I understand that the advice I'm being given to move on and just let go and be happy and blah blah, all means well and is said with sincerity, but they've all been through break-ups. They all know it's not that simple. Everyone wishes it had been that simple and no one wants to see their friend hurting, but everyone knows it's not that simple and that the pain is just a part of it.

He's been saying to me that this year is going to be a good year for us. I just wasn't aware that when he said "us" it would eventually mean "us" in a seperate entity. Not "us" as in terms of being a couple.

Sure, it's going to be a good year. I'm living on my own again. He's living in his first apartment. We're both taking the steps into going back to school. I'm going to find, maybe not entirely, but some form of who I really am.

Right now, though, I'm taking the slow steps in recovering. It's a slow, painful process, but each day is a new day. Some days are harder than others, but it's only because I let it get to me. Sometimes, though, I just need to cry.

Today, is not one of those days. It's just simply a kind of day.

ryc:
it seems to disappear after you do it for the day. Also make sure you're using msie and not ff.
» ikimashokie on 2009-05-27 05:17:14

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