welcome to my mind ...

The hotter it gets outside, the hotter my room gets. Regardless that I have the fan blowing almost 24-7 {even though it says I'm not supposed to; the motor could die that way} and the A/C is running almost constantly. My room always seems to be 10 degrees hotter than the remainder of the house. Fuck!

I didn't sleep well at all last night and the nap I took earlier went about the same. Probably because it's nearly impossible to sleep in the fucking heat. You can never get comfortable and you wake up sweating. Not fun.

I borrowed a few CDs from my mom. It's all classical-type music specifically designed to help you relax. Even though I have to work tomorrow, I think I'm going to listen to them tonight {I've got them on right now too.} Maybe they'll help relax me enough so that I can sleep without tossing and turning.

I know in the back of my mind, things will work out, but I'm still afraid.

Sorry that you guys have to see me in this downward spiral. It's not fun when you see someone who is incredibly happy for a month {longer than my normal sudden boost in attitude} and then slowly start to break down and revert back to their original state. I try to be upbeat and in a reasonable mood, but it only lasts as long as I'm at work. And that's only because I have to put on the mask. I let myself go for a few days and everyone was asking me what was wrong. Seeing as how I didn't want to talk about it, I knew I needed to work on my facial composure. It seems to be working. Only when I say something about what's bothering me does anyone notice that I'm still just as depressed as on the days I made it obvious.

I need to figure out where I can get shades or some sort of material to cover my big ass front window. Something that will block the sun from shining through. That's mainly what's causing my room to be freakishly hot. But where am I supposed to get something that will cover my 59" x 47" window ... that's reasonably cheap? I'll still have light in my room; I have another window, but it's North facing so no worries about the sun. I just really need to do something about my front window.

Anywho, I bought a bunch of socks today. I needed new socks. The ones I've had are getting very worn because I only have so many pairs; I'm having to wash them once a week so I have them to wear the next week. Now I don't have to worry about that. I can go more than 2 weeks without running out of socks. And they're all different colors & designs {stripes, polka-spots, etc.} The only thing is that I've become accustomed to no show and smaller socks. These are just low cut. They're still below my ankle, but I'm not used to having a cuff to deal with. Oh well. I'll get used to them. I kinda don't have a choice.

Okay, I think this entry is far long enough. I'll write again whenever.

You could go to a fabric store if you have one nearby and get whatever material's cheapest, then make a makeshift curtain.
» randomjunk on 2008-06-14 11:00:55

I want to jump into the nearest pool and stay in there for a few hours.. It's really hot over here too. Couldn't sleep at night =_=;

I'll be stalking you guys as usual because life is too boring without nutang..
» Nuttz on 2008-06-15 12:35:53

if you want to go all cheap (and don't care how it looks), use a comforter to cover your window. That's what I have to cover my window in my bedroom and it works pretty well.
» lazypuppy on 2008-06-15 01:34:16

Well now that you mention it, I guess it's ok for me to do the same. Honestly I was getting a little worried with your current state of affairs...I mean I haven't known you for very long (I only started participating in the Nutang community like a year ago), so I didn't know this was your "original state." It makes me sad though, that your "original state" is full of this much crap -_- Bleh.

Shoot, I hate the heat. I would rather be freezing than fried anyday of my life. At least it's easier to fall asleep when you're cold...even if it's from borderline hypothermia haha. It doesn't even get cooler at night in Vegas??
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