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*sigh*
Tuesday. 8.7.07 3:15 pm
There is so much going through my mind right now, its almost a little ridiculous. Lets see, I need to call the places that I applied at so that I can see about scheduling interviews; I need to remember exactly when I filled out the ones online so that I can give it a full week to process into their systems {I don't want it to sound like I'm desperate, even though I'm starting to feel that way}; I'm thinking about getting my license; about possibly getting two jobs so that I'll have more money available to me; about when would be a good time to start searching for a car; about when would be a good time to actually seriously look into getting my own place {I know which complex I want to move into; I just need to see if they do 6 or 9 month leases}

I'm also thinking about certain things that are more of a focus than they actually should be: guys; two in specific.
Stuart is still a focus on my mind and there are still things that upset me. I'm working on getting over him and its, at least a little, better than when I left Tucson. I think it might help that we never dated, but I felt for him like we had, even though I knew we didn't. Its sort of confusing. I'm going to have to deal with not talking to him at all soon enough. He'll be going into Marine bootcamp and then he'll be shipped off to Iraq or Afghanastan {I can't remember exactly which} for upwards of at least a year or longer. I don't want to think about that yet though.

Charlie is the other focus on my mind right now. In a sense I'm thinking about him more than I should simply to keep my mind off of Stuart. One of the downfalls in doing so is that its causing me to like him more than I should. I haven't seen Charlie in 5 years and we haven't really talked that much. He has my number, but he hasn't called me and I don't have his number so I can't call him. We've only talked through myspace. He's camping right now, but he said that he'd call me when he got back so that we can work out a date and time when we can get together and hang out. I'm looking really forward to seeing him, but the part of my mind that's afraid it won't happen is keeping my excitement under control. Two parts of my mind are fighting: the one that's hoping he'll like me {which would make it a little easier} and the part that's trying to convince me he won't. The only thing I can do is wait and see. Not an easy task for an impatient person.

I think that's it, but it seems like so much more cuz I can't seem to focus on exactly one thing. And a lot of the things flying around through my mind are repeating themselves over and over, making it harder to focus.

About the only time when my thoughts are not zooming around in my head is when I'm reading and I'm focused only on the book. I had trouble focusing on HP7; though I did like the book, there were parts of it that made my mind wander off. With the Twilight series, however, I am almost completely wrapped up in the book, nevermind that this is the third time I'm reading the them. Its in anticipation for Eclipse {which came out today! yay!!!} which I'll be buying hopefully sometime between tomorrow and Friday.

The way she writes the story, it makes you think that it could be real; and it helps that she sets the story in real places, real locations in the world. Some of the characters, though, are completely fictional {however there are some people who actually believe in vampires and werewolves} The way the story goes it almost makes me want to believe in them. There's a small part of me that hopes there's someone out there that's as perfect for me as Edward is for Bella.

Anywho, I think I've written enough. I shall end this here.
2 Comments.


Good luck with finding a job and with the place you want to stay. Have you got your Eclipse yet? I can't wait to get mine. I'm sure there's a chance for you to find your own Edward, just less prefect than the Edward we read in the book.
» Nuttz on 2007-08-08 03:12:27

there is someone out there just for you...you just haven't found them yet and they haven't found you. It will happen...eventually. You just have to believe it will happen. You're still young!

I know what you mean with books...my favorite book pulled me in with the story and I really REALLY wished I could have been there. I don't know if you're really into historical fiction or not, but I would definately suggest it.
» lazypuppy on 2007-08-08 02:54:51

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