My friend Jeff Thompson, who is in social journalism at Auburn, wrote this. Any comments you have will be directed back to him, although I will state that I agree with everything he wrote.


Jeff Thompson on religion and the season, and assholes:
so if we've been taking Christ out of Christmas, where have we been putting him?
is he floating in some purgatory-esque state above us, just waiting for americans to invite him back into his old Christmas habits, like showing up where people gather in his name but don't acknowledge his presence? is he waiting to take his rest in the manger on the mantle, above the stocking overflowing with treats for the dog? Responding "yes" or "no" (because he answers every prayer) to pleas for x-box 360s and furbys and razor scooters and razor phones and other shit? maybe he needs to decide what to do or what not to do some more so we have a template for morality and conviction and those damn bracelets would be relevant again. He could give our president more advice, maybe what george could get his Saudi friends this year, what would prove beyond a shadow of a doubt he's willing to suck their dicks until crude oil comes out said urethras. i guess its possible he's just waiting up there for his chance to get back up on that cross. i mean, He loved it the first time we put him up there, right?
i submit to you that the arrogant ranting of the christian populus is justified when it states that Christ has been removed from christmas. when they preach from the pulpits across this great country that no more does Jesus fit the description of "the reason for the season." it has filled Christians' hearts with anger to hear the words "merry christmas" dissipate from the lips of the retail clerks. And be replaced with such universal tidings of good fortune as "happy holidays"... The season they speak of was our season first! it is blasphemy! woe to the non-believers, they shall surely atone at the hands of the almighty for their sins against the Lord! Oh Great Christ where are you in our time of need?!!

i'll tell you who took Christ out of Christmas. it was you and your fucking Christmas tree.

Every time you voted for a $60 billion defense budget and against a tax hike for education. Every time you silently worshipped Clear Channel, Wal-Mart, Coca-Cola, Nike, Rupert Murdock, Haliburton, Enron, and etc. for their stunning achievements. Every time you scorned welfare because people abuse it or socialized healthcare because you wouldnt get treated for illness faster than the poor. The market kills so swiftly when it uses your love of money as the dagger.
my first question is this: in the nativity scene nestled quaintly on the end table in the living room of your $250,000 home, where is the tree? if you notice the star in the center of the top of the stable, you can draw an invisible cone straight south to find it. perhaps you will notice it's placement directly above the manger. coincidence? i think not. there's your Christmas present you asshole. God. and what is God you ask? God is love. I find it hard to believe that a pair of $200 nike shox made by a starving Vietnamese child possibly making $0.08 american dollars per week can, in your minds, potentially symbolize such a gift.
However, I may be wrong. i dare say it is possible they were purchased out of undying love for an offspring, lover or spouse. in which case i ask my second question:
Are they even aware of that love? Are you aware? Or has the "hustle and bustle" of the Christmas season (i.e. day-after-thanksgiving fistfight you initiated when the last pair's availability was threatened) desensitized you to this intended motive? and when your ungrateful kid cries because they aren't the right fucking color will you throw up your hands in disgust of not being able to please the spoiled brat no matter how hard you try? or will you relate it to the "Christ" those goddamned Islams removed from your merry day and love them even more, like he loved you when you spit on his corpse while it hung from that other religious tree, like you do every damn day.

you'd spit on that kid. of course you would.

i implore you, this season, when you get to the cashier after an hour and a half of waiting in line, when she does her best to force that smile, that sick, pathetic smile she's mustered up the heart to give you after 10 hours on her feet, dealing with irate customer after irate customer for slave wages and says "happy holidays"...

keep your fucking arrogant republican mouth shut.

even if you're boiling with disgust and swelling with hopelessly sinful pride for your religion, keep your mouth shut and realize that she's begging you to Praise Jesus. Practically from her knees she struggles to find the breath to purse her lips and ask you to thank God for the job that gave you your time off for the holiday, thank God you don't have an illegitimate child that won't get a goddamned thing for Christmas, that you might not even get to hold because you'll be working that day. Praise Heaven Above you haven't been yelled at, cursed at, called a stupid bitch and a fucking cunt all day because the ipod sale isn't running anymore, or because you can't make the credit card machine confirm the purchase faster.

with that phrase, she asks you to thank God you're not her.

so my final question is, what would Jesus do?

he'd come to your lavish house and beat your fat ass with your stupid tree. then you and He and your family and your gifts and your Christmas dinner would go to the ghetto across town, the place you tell your kids not to go near because black people are scary and unpredictable, and you'd give away everything. everything. even your shoes. and you'd see those that were hungry eat and those that were cold warmed and those that had nothing given something and you would see love. you would see that baby in that manger. you would understand tolerance and hope, as well as the lack thereof. and you would humble yourself before your Lord as you should on Christmas. Asshole.

Actually, I saw this right after I wrote mine, and said to myself "At least someone else is pissed off too". Thanks for stopping by :)
» Jack's Raging Mommty (67.43.242.182) on 2005-12-20 03:38:44

re: comment
thanks for bringing that to my attention.. the popups are no more.
» dave on 2005-12-20 05:33:12

YAY! popups are no more!
Very nicely written :-) major props 2 Jeff!
» CPKviperpheonix on 2005-12-20 07:02:32

A little bit sophmoric - reeks of trying to hard to be in your face. I agree with a lot of it tho.
» Mocking Music (24.222.23.171) on 2005-12-24 01:50:38

Two Thumbs Up
I could not agree more. As I (personally speaking) try to stay away from profanity in my own blog (for certain directory listing reasons only), I was trying to find the right words to express myself, and couldn't get it right - but you have hit the nail on the head. You should win an award for writing that.
» Stephanie Davies (68.185.218.110) on 2005-12-24 11:15:15

Hrmmm..
A moment if I may say I am so tired of hearing people say oh wah, wah the Christmas Spirit has become purchased by corporations and repackaged for 19.99 or Where's Jesus in christmas now a days?? Christmas has evolved into more than a religious holiday and second of all not all of us worship Jesus as our own personal savior and still consider Christmas a WONDERFUL holiday in which we take the time to thank those through out the year and give gifts to those we love to show our appreciation. and If one is so upset about it then why not make your own christmas.. and damn it stop taking my presents if your only going to bitch about it later!!! Consumer's are assholes all around. Whether its the holidays or not. I make more than slave wages (much more) and I still get bitched out by consumers because their not getting their way.
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