Sunday. 9.2.07 6:56 pm
"Disorder in the Court. the things people actually said in court, word for word."
A number of actual questions asked of witnesses by attorneys during trials and some of the responses given.
Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July fifteenth.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.
Q: What gear were you in at the moment of impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
Q: This mysanthenia gravis - does it affect your memory?
A: Yes.
Q: In what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?
Q: How old is your son - the one living with you.
A: Thirty-eight or thiry-five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years.
Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?
A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.
Q:And where was the location of the accident?
A: Approximately milepost 499
Q: And where is milepost 499?
Q: Probably between milepost 498 and 450.
Q: Sir, what is your IQ?
A: Well, I can see pretty well, I think.
Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved with voodoo or occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.
Q: Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?
A: Yes.
Q: Did the defendant say anything when she got out of the car?
A: Yes, sir.
Q: What did she say?
A: What disco am I at?
Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
Q:Were you present when your picture was taken?
Q: Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war?
Q: Did he kill you?
Q: How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?
Q: You were there until the time you left, is that true?
Q: How many times did you commit suicide?
Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was Aug. 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were doing at that time?
Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q. How many of them were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?
Oh dear... I do wish people would think before opening their mouths...
» Someones_Muse on 2007-09-02 11:26:45
I'm still laughing about the "How many times did you commit suicide" one.
» randomjunk on 2007-09-03 03:02:58
I'm wondering if the questions were asked on purpose to test the alertness of the witness' brain.
» Nuttz on 2007-09-03 07:36:28
"ROTFL" » invisible on 2007-09-05 05:16:26
:) Thanks for boosting my ego. I laughed out loud for some of these.
» Dilated on 2007-09-05 09:57:37
Ah-ha I know who you arrreeeee...
The layout gave it away ;-) But so did your first entry. Whatever.
Haha I chuckled @ most of these, I say chuckle because it was sad at the same time funny. I feel suddenly more intelligent...
» The-Muffin-Man on 2007-09-05 11:06:50
. Haha, this is pretty funny. In turn I feel lame because the entry title made me think of the Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney games
» BigErn on 2007-09-10 12:21:09
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