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Time Capsule 9
Saturday. 3.7.09 12:30 pm
Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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It snowed! Surprise!
Tuesday. 3.3.09 11:05 pm
It snowed Sunday night into Monday morning, so no school! And for a legit reason, too. I spent the time mostly with AJ. We messed around in the neighborhood for a while with Sydney, who is apparently extremely hyper when it snows. We had a small snowball fight around AJ while he was trying to clean off his truck, haha. I miss the days when a bunch of kids could have a street snowball fight. Ah,well.

Then we went to Kyle's house, where we learned that everyone had apparently ditched us. SuZZ called AJ, and we were like, "Where are
you ?" But they eventually came back, and we watched the second Narnia movie, Prince Caspian. So that wasn't so bad, after all.

AND THEN! Ryan tried to initiate a small movie night, but Kyle and John could not come. I hadn't driven
much all day, so I think Mom took pity and let me go even though it was a school night. I brought Katie along, but it ended up being just me, her, and Ryan himself. We watched An American Carol, which was entertaining, and then we watched disturbing videos on the internet, and then I took her home and went to sleep.

Lots of names dropped in this entry, huh?

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Friday. 2.27.09 9:22 pm
I am on EDGE.

The weather turned sour, I'm stuck here at home myself reading this stupid book for English...

It's like I have all this nervous energy, and for once I want to spend it somewhere, but I can't and it's making me crabby. I'm not thinking things through like I should.

I'm breaking one of the biggest rules of critical thinking. I'm choosing my outcome before I really go over the evidence. I'm biasing like crazy.

I'm, I'm, I'm.

I'm sorry.

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Thursday. 2.26.09 11:08 pm
I'll come get you.


Normally, I don't partake much in community events, but this time I felt I had to, because...well, mostly because Ikimishokie made me do it. But also because I like favicons. Yupyup.

Today I was outside with my dog, when I remembered a similar scene when I was little. Apparently it was the first time I'd noticed a grey sky (full of storm clouds). I was playing on my neighbor's trampoline, and I looked up. The sky was luminous, but it was all diffused. The light was silver, and I never thought that it could ALL be clouds.

I was looking at it, and suddenly the impression of a vast bowl placed upside down over the world hit me. I ran inside the house yelling because I thought the world was about to end.

I miss going out on my roof. When I get a house, I'll be sure the it has easy roof access, especially through a window.

Did you know that I'm not bulletproof? I mean, we all know I get sad and mopey, angry, frustrated, excited, paranoid, etc...but did you know I actually get hurt? Usually I don't let things get to me. They roll off my skin. People say lots of things, and they rarely intentionally mean to hurt someone. Sometimes people are just careless, and I can't let that bother me.

But, of course, there are those who really get to me. They don't just make me indignant about being impolite. They hurt me. They're sarcastic, or sometimes they do something with just the intention to cause pain. It's a form of self defense, presumable, but that's not completely true because there are many other ways of resolving things. And the more frank I'm being, the more it hurts, because it always cuts deeper when you're opening some insecurity or just being real with someone.

We had basketball practice late, tonight. Not only that, but we had it in another church's gym...the same church we play against this Saturday.

A few people couldn't make it, so we played four on four most of the time. The first game, my team lost, but then we won.

I am so physically exhausted I could hardly put my towel on the rack after my shower. And it's great. I'm used to being tired or sleepy, but now my body aches and I feel good. It's a nice difference.

I just finished 1984. I can't decide what the story is actually ABOUT. I loved it, but I hated the ending. No hope at all. Bummer. It makes sense, but it would have been pretty easy for the author to change or add to the ending. Ah, well. Point is, the whole "doublethink" thing that Zanzibar was talking about earlier is a scary idea. And it's scary when I realize that I do it, too. Everybody does. It goes against the very laws of nature, seemingly, but for all we know it could be applicable.

I don't agree with the ideas of the Party, but their plan definitely seems infallible. And half the time, they aren't even aware of any ulterior motives that they have. Weird, huh?

I need to stop reading during physics. I've missed the lesson on work and power. The theory is simple, but the formulas aren't fun. I'm starting to lose track of my newton meters and my force units.

If you integrate acceleration, you get velocity. If you integrate velocity, you get position. But what do you get if you integrate position? Meter seconds?


I want a tattoo. I don't know where. Probably somewhere usually out of sight. But I know what. Just a word. Theme of my life, you know.

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