Texas Drivers: The Truth Comes Out
Friday. 1.14.05 12:31 am
WARNING: When talking about Texas Driver's, Kollin tends to cuss a great deal so please excuse my language. My intensions are not to offend you, unless of course you're one of these assholes who don't know how to drive.
Well its time for me to bitch about more stuff...yes, my life is quite simple at the present time but theres always a need to bitch about something...see, what goes on in my head is like 90% bitching anyways so why not share it with all of you!?
Intro To Driving in Texas
I shall tell you now, this will be somewhat long...i like driving...i like driving a lot...put the music on and go...but its not that simple here in Texas...when you get out on the road, you're taking a huge risk here...the chances of you getting into an accident i'm sure are pretty damn good...driving here really pisses me off...even when people aren't even on the road, it pisses me off...i shall elaborate
People in texas don't know how to: merge
Half of the reason why driving on the highway is absolute hell is because people do not know how to merge...when you're about to get on the highway you don't slow down, you don't hit the breaks, you don't screw around...what do you do? floor it and pick a spot to fit in...no, can't do that...i mean that would actually be good...can't have that...i mean you're probably going from (assuming you drive the speed limit) 45 to 65 mph...usually i go 5 mph over the speed limit...so i pretty much go from 50 to 70 in that little stretch of road where you're going to merge onto the highway...its not hard or anything but every asshole living in texas doesn't know how to do it...first of all they're probably going like 40 on the side road...second of all, when they supposedly speed up to go onto the highway, its really slow...40...hmm guess i should speed up some...45...i'm not even gonna pick a spot to fit in cuz hey i can just force my way in cuz i'm an asshole...50...getting pretty close now...55...oh all of the cars in that first lane are now changing lanes cuz they can see that i'm an asshole who doesn't know how to merge...60...and now i'm on the highway, forced myself in there, going below the speed limit, and i'm pissing off the remaining cars behind me in this lane...a job well done texas driver...what they need is someone to pull them over, pull them out of their car, and beat the livin shit out of them...THEN maybe they'll start thinking "hmm maybe i should learn how to merge?"...god people...press down on that little fuckin peddle that makes your car go faster!!!!
People in Texas don't know how to: accelerate
Alright...you come up to a traffic light thats red...you're behind someone, no problem...it turns green...now your instant thought is "green = go"...but not in the minds of Texas drivers...oh no, green does not mean go in their minds...green means: look at the green light and ponder whether or not you should go...then when you've decided to go, slowly and very gently move forward so you can make everyone behind you mad...whats the big deal?...why can't you just push down on the little fuckin peddle that makes you go faster and accelerate from the start...you don't need to be Dale Earnhardt here but geeze, ACCELERATE!!!!...they go from 0 to 55 in 3.5 minutes...these are also people who need to get their ass's kicked
People in Texas don't know how to: deal with 4 way stops
Its quite simple really...you come up to the stop sign and stop...then look to see if anyone got there first...if someone did, then you let them go before you...then you go...sounds simple, right?...oh nooo, we have to make it complicated...here in Texas, we stop at the stop sign and just sit there for no fucking reason...they just sit there...theres like cars coming in each direction...it was obvious who got there first...but no, everyone stops and sits there...hmm who should go first?...then right when someone gets up the courage to go first, another person does the same, then they all stop again...my god people...what the hell is so complicated about this!?!?!...oh and i absolutely love when i'm coming up on a stop sign, its totally obvious another person got there before me, and i stop...they're still stopped...and like 2 or 3 seconds go by...i'm sitting here thinking "hello? you stopped there way before me, go you little Texas idiot"...then they finally get up the courage to go...and of course, cuz they're a Texas driver, they go slow as shit...really drives me insane
People in Texas don't know what a slow lane and a fast lane is
In Colorado, no matter what road you were on, if it had two lanes there was a slow lane and a fast lane...the lane on the right is a slow lane...the lane on the left is a fast lane...Texas drivers need to learn this...Texas drivers never go the speed limit...its quite rare...if they do, they're probably from another state...so lets say the speed limit is 55 mph...they'll either go below 50 or above 60...the above 60 is usually some punk high schooler who thinks hes a badass in his little piece of shit civic...i have no problem with them because a) they're not in my way and b) well i don't really have a "b" cuz as long as they're out of my way, i'm happy...so on 242/college park i get stuck behind people going like 45 or even 50...but its not just that...its two cars, going that same speed, in both lanes...so its impossible to get around them...what the hell is your problem? first of all, the guy next to you is pretty much in your blind spot and second of all, you're an asshole who is going below the speed limit...get the fuck out of the way!...i mean really...the fast lane would be for people either going the speed limit or going faster than the speed limit...the slow lane would be for people going the speed limit or going below the speed limit...its quite simple!...god...i mean, i'm usually going 60 mph on that road...when i'm not paying attention to my speed it usually drifts upwards into the 60 - 65 mph range then i bring it back down to 60...unless of course cops are present then i go the speed limit...but really, unless the cop is an absolute asshole, he's not gonna take the time to pull you over for going 5 mph over the speed limit...and when i see that some asshole feels the need to go faster than me and is behind me, i'm usually nice enough to either speed up and let him pass me (assuming someone is next to me) or i'll get in the other lane...is this really that hard?...slow lane, fast lane...and it IS okay to go the speed limit...i'm not in any hurry usually but geeze, don't piss me off by going slow as shit...if you really can't handle the vehicle, go home and park it shithead...bottom line: either go the speed limit or 5 mph above it, otherwise, get the fuck out of my way
Actually On The Highway
Oh my god...you're asking to get killed if you do this...you're saying "i want to die today" when you go onto the highway...you got people coming onto the highway who of course don't know how to merge (see the above section on merging)...then you have people who of course go like 5 - 10 mph below the speed limit...then you have people who go 10 - 15 mph above the speed limit...then you have those assholes who not only feel the need to speed a great deal, but cut everyone off in the process of doing so...then the same thing happens here, people clump together and its a pain in the ass to pass them...you have semi's not paying attention and are on the verge of crushing you...you have people who, and i fuckin love this, feel they need to BRAKE on the highway...you don't brake on the highway...you want to die? don't brake on the damn highway unless you absolutely have to...all you have to do is let off the gas...i'm pretty damn sure your vehicle will slow down...its a death trap...i get on there when i have to go to the mall or places in that area...i'm starting to get more comfortable with it cuz you have to think that every person around you wants you to die and so you want to get away from them...haul ass onto the high way and avoid any signs of someone wanting to kill you...its hard...i'm always like stressed out, both hands very tightly gripping the stearing wheel, my eyes never blinking...in the back of my head i'm praying to god that i'll survive...i've seen many an asshole on the highway but fortunately i haven't been in an accident on there yet
People coming off the highway
Yeah see they don't slow down usually or that much coming off the highway...and when the side road has like 2 or 3 lanes, they'll just swerve across all 3 lanes without looking...oh yes, i've almost been hit several times because of this...yes they have the right of way but the rule simply is you have to look before changing lanes and you have to wait 3 seconds to cross the next one...oh no, in 3 seconds, they'll have been across all 3 lanes and have you successfully driven off of the road...i always get in the farthest lane away from the highway when they're coming off of it and yet i'm still in danger
Cutting people off is okay in Texas
Oh yes, people do it all the time...i mean you can just see it happen like 20 times in a day...they'll be in the left lane...in the right lane, theres really no space to get in there, the cars too close together...whats the Texas way every one? "Force your way in!"...yes!...so without warning, they'll shove themselves into the right lane and force the person behind them to slam on the breaks...they'll cut in front of you no matter what...if i see any signs of an asshole about to cut me off and theres a car right in front of me as it is, i speed up and close the gap...hell no, you're not getting in front of me asshole...you wanna get in front of me? you're gonna have to do it over my dead body
This brings me to my other point...you know how you're in a lane, its quite clear that lets say, the right lane ends...theres signs that point this out...traffic is heavy...so shitheads who don't wanna get into the left lane right away, drive all the way down there in the right lane, ahead of everyone and expect you to let them in...heres where i become a major asshole...unless you didn't try to cheat your way in here, i'm not letting you in...you are not going to get in front of me...and i don't care what the cost is...you can hit me, you can cuss at me, you can flip me off, i'm not letting you in...its gotten to that point too...you know how they'll get really close to your car...i hug the bumper in front of me...every inch that person moves up, i'm right behind them making sure i never leave a space open there...and some shithead is like right next to me getting all pissed off cuz i won't let him in...i'll even look him in the face and mouth the words "you're not getting in here shithead"...and i'll shake my finger at them indicated that unless you have a death wish, i'm not letting you in...they give up eventually...probably move in behind you...i'm dead serious here...if i want you in front of me, i'll let you know...i will make some kind of hand signal, i'll open a space but if you think for one minute i'm gonna let you in when you're being a shithead and cheating, hell no
The Lane That Isn't
Brings me to another point...a lot of times right next to the left and right lanes, theres a fair amount of space to fit a vehicle...however thats not an actual lane...Texas Drivers however think that is a lane...so you'll get assholes who of course cheat by driving down there and want into your lane...once again, unless you're properly merging or turning into my lane, you're not getting in...theres no fucking way on this fucking planet you are getting in front of me...i'd rather jump off the Brooklyn fuckin Bridge than give you the satisfaction of being in front of me...then theres people who don't even want in your lane, they just wanna use that side part as a lane...i was driving down 1488 a while ago and this asshole is doing exactly that...driving down that side part there not even wanting in...it was like solid traffic but he made absolutely no attempt to be in a lane...so hes like driving right next me...after about 3 seconds of not making any attempt to get into the lane, i get pissed...so what do i do? make it known that i'm pissed at you...so, and this is very rare, i honk on the horn and wave my hands at this guy...hes right next to me...without rolling down my window i mouth the words "hey asshole! get in the fuckin lane!" and of course point behind me indicated that the shithead needs to get behind me...what does he do? feel he needs to argue his point...no sir, you do what i fuckin say...so i honk again and by now he can probably hear me say "get in the god damn lane!!!"...what does he do? try to get in front of me...oh hell no, you get behind me mother fucker...so at this point i pretty much own the fucker cuz if he doesn't get into the actual lane, i'm gonna do my best to embarrass the shit out of him and make his life a living hell...so he better get in somewhere behind me...after 3 attempts at getting in front of me, he finally gets the picture and someone lets him in behind me...don't fuck with me...don't even think for one god damn second you can fuck with me, its not gonna happen...when i want you to do something, you're gonna do it...that was interesting experience but bottom line: you're not getting in front of me unless i say you're going to and if you think for one second you're gonna get away with this "lets just illegally drive on the side of the road" thing, it ain't gonna happen...just cuz i look like some punk teenager doesn't mean you can just do whatever the hell you want to me...i'll put you in your place shithead
Honking My Horn
I don't like honking my horn...its loud and its rude...unless i absolutely have to, i'm not gonna use it...if you're really pissing me off and you're not paying attention THEN i'll use my horn...i've only honked my horn maybe 4 times in the 5 years or so that i've been driving...to be honest, it partly embarrasses me to use it cuz well, the attention is on me along with the shithead doing whatever...so i avoid using it...so unless someone really pisses me off or if i'm not in the mood to deal with these Texas drivers, i'm not gonna use it...it takes a great deal.
Traffic Signs in Texas
They're horrible here...when you actually have to merge left, the sign indicating you need to merge left, is in some horrible spot you can't see...so pretty much, your lane ends before you can prepare for it...you're just coasting along listening to music then "oh shit, the lane ends!"...or when you're going from one major highway to the next, wheres the sign saying that?...i've seen several spots where theres no sign or its a shitty place...i'm directionally challenged as it is, we don't need to make things worse on me here...its almost to the point where its like you miss your exit or you just barely realize your lane ends and THEN theres the sign saying "Oh, forgot to tell you, that lane ends. I hope you made it!"...geeze...what the hell...and you know its some asshole who gets paid hourly who puts up these signs...the least you could do is put it somewhere where people can see...or better yet, put it up there period...my dad actually got a ticket for turning illegally or something but he didn't see the sign...took it to court and won...thats telling you something assholes
Traffic Lights Part A
The traffic lights here suck...In Colorado it would turn green for a certain amount of time and then turn yellow and then turn red...here it turns green and stays that way until someone on the right or left of you pulls up to their red light...then, assuming its not a major intersection, it turns yellow then red...well on the other side, it then turns green...if you're a guy still driving down the road and see this, you're not getting through this light...unless you were stopped in front of it or had just stopped in front of it when it turned green, you're not getting through it...unless of course you speed up a great deal...i hate that...why can't it just stay green for a little while longer?...it does in Colorado...why not here?...i mean thats half the reason why people get killed here...cuz it turns green and you see it and you're thinking "fuck! i know i can make it! *floors it*"...and then it turns yellow "come on baby! stay yellow!!!! *floors it even more*"...BAM its red, you finally make it through there (can't slow down, you're going too fast) but of course running a red light and smashing the shit out of the car who goes through the green light on the other side...i mean come on, if you saw the light was green and it really wasn't that far away, you should be given enough time to go through it...not here...so that brings me to part B
Traffic Lights part B
Everyone eventually runs a red light...its gonna happen but it should only happen like once or twice in 30 years or something...here you see people running the red lights allllll the time...especially on left turns...if you've even been in this state for 30 minutes, you know how the traffic lights are...you shouldn't be having this "running the red light" problem...but no...and they don't just run the red light sometimes...they run the red light with the red light being red for a fair amount of time (lotta red there)...so when it turns green you're taking a risk there cuz some asshole could be running the red light...and its a damn good chance...so i make sure nobody's flooring it right when their light turns red...but i mean, come on...what the hell is wrong with you? you can't make it to the store 2 minutes later?...you can't handle being at work at 7:58 am as opposed to 7:55 am?...stop at the red light!...especially on turns...oh this drives me insane...people will turn left in front of you...you're thinking "alright, my light will turn green soon"...it turns green and what happens? 1-4 cars will still be turning left in front of you...uhh hello? its red asshole...you had to slow down to turn as it is, you can't possibly stop when its red?...one of these days i'm just gonna fuckin lay on the horn when someone does this...they do it all the fuckin time...its like "oh, no its okay for 4 cars to run the red light"...ugh...i can understand if like the light JUST turned red as your car was JUST starting to turn...cuz theres that little delay there before the other light turns green...thats okay...i've done it, everyone has...its okay...but when you have time to stop for the red light and it was quite obvious the light had turned red, you need to stop asshole...irritates the shit out of me...hello? pay attention shit heads!! my lights green, your lights red, YOU DO NOT HAVE THE RIGHT TO GO!!!
Traffic Lights part C
Okay, i go to Pete's or Ashley's quite a bit...at least in the past couple of weeks...so usually when i'm on my way home its anywhere between 12 and 2 am...well nobodys on the road at those times usually...so when you pull up to a light here in Texas and its red and theres nobody coming on either side, you're gonna be waiting a long time...i fuckin hate it...nobodys coming on the left, okay...nobodys coming on the right, okay...nobody else is stopped at a red light...you're the only person there...and after a few seconds, no progress, what am i thinking?...CAN I GET A GOD DAMN GREEN LIGHT ALREADY!!! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!!!...oh no, you'll be waiting there until someone happens to stop at one of the other lights that are red and that could be a while because nobody's up at these times on a week day...what the hell?...i mean i've gotten use to it now...i'll stop, turn on the light in the car, check out my CDs...clean up a little bit of trash...rearrange my change or whatever else is in there...mess with the air conditioning...maybe look in the mirror, make sure i don't look too terribly weird...look at the light, meh still red...put in another CD...meh i'm not really in the mood for that one...put in another CD...*shocked face* what is this i see!? somethings happening!...holy shit!!! we need to alert the media!!! the light is going to turn GREEN!!!!!!...i mean, i'm so happy to see that my light turned green i'm on the verge of having an orgasm...what the hell?...fuckin traffic lights!
Cutting you off - ish
So you're driving down the road, maybe going 60 mph...you see some car come up to there red light, wanting to turn right...which you can do, its legal...but you're going 60 mph...you're coming up on them quite fast...what am i thinking? "oh don't you dare...don't you even think about it asshole...you stay right fucking there!!!!"...what happens of course?...the stupid shithead pulls out in front of me, forcing me to hit the brakes...and most likely, the shithead won't even go faster than 5 mph below the speed limit...and there probably wasn't anyone behind me either...goodness...asshole!!!...you can't wait 2 seconds!?!?...i'm thinking "*slams on the brakes* you fucking asshole!!! 2 god damn seconds!!! you could have waited 2 god damn seconds!!! oh great, you can't even accelerate!! we now have to go 5 miles below the speed limit!! thank you, shithead!!!"...grrrr!!!!...pisses me off...when i'm gonna turn right on a red, i stop, then make sure that if someone is coming i'll have enough time to accelerate and make it so they don't have to brake because of me...is that so hard to do? aparently it is...stupid assholes...and its probably some little piece of shit wanna be car/motorized skate board...its just like "uhh hello? big fuckin SUV barrelling down the road going 60 mph!!!! you can't fucking see that!?!?!"...its not some pretend car...my SUV is a no shit SUV...its not even one of those "cross between a caravan and an SUV" like SUV...no, its a real fuckin SUV...4 door SUV...something you can CLEARLY see...unless you want your brains splattered all over the fucking road and your mom crying "oh if only johnny wasn't a dipshit", i suggest you wait 3 seconds...oh and i just absolutely love it when its some big fuckin concrete truck..."hello? shithead? obviously that big fuckin truck of yours isn't gonna accelerate very fast! stay the fuck out of my way!!!"
Some of the Roads in my subdivision
Okay, so some of the roads in my subdivision don't have the lines indicating this is the left side and that is the right side...cars on this side go this direction...cars on the other side go the opposite direction...but its pretty easy to see that you drive this way, another car drives the other way...and you gotta see that you need to make room for the other car...people have SUCH a problem with this...again, i have an SUV...i real fucking SUV...i suggest you give me the proper room for me to get this SUV down the road...i'm not asking for more than half of the road...i mean i'll give you plenty of space...oh noooo...people just have to be huge fuckin assholes and pretty much drive down the middle of the road...PAY ATTENTION YOU SHITHEAD!!!...how can you NOT see my SUV???
Parking on the side of the road
People really don't know how to do this...they park their vehicle so far into the street it causes traffic problems...and yes, they had plenty of room to put it more into the grass (talking about my subdivision again)...stupid assholes...you can't take 5 seconds of your time to reposition your car so that the chance of an accident decreases by 60%??
Parking in a regular parking lot
This is also a challenge for Texas drivers...we can't just park...we need to make this difficult and piss someone off...they never park straight...its like wayy over to the left, way over to the right, not all the way in the parking space, all the way into the parking space on the other side...they just can't get it right...i mean, i'm not fantastic at parking but these people...what are they on drugs?...you don't have a damn semi!!!...and of course, people squeeze into these little tiny fuckin spaces...when you get to your car its like "hmm so i guess we're gonna have to cut a hole in the top to get in here"...when its too small MOVE ON!!!
So the other day i was driving down this road next to the wal-mart...so theres a lot of areas where cars can go onto this road and off looking for a parking space...this road has only a couple stop signs, at this particular moment i'm talking about, the nearest stop sign doesn't even matter...so i have the right of way driving down here...this asshole, jumps out in front of me, forces me to slam on my brakes, then flips me off telling me i was in the wrong...he flipped me off!!!...he was the shithead who jumped out in front of me!!!!...less than 2 seconds after that, driving down the same road, another bitch flips me off...what the hell?...aparently, i'm suppose to stop where there is no stop sign and let this bitch go in front of me...uhh no princess, you're stayin right fucking there...so i totally had the right of way both times and i got flipped off
Turning a Corner
Nobody in Texas knows how to turn a corner...you slow down going into a turn then you speed up going out of a turn...what do these assholes do? slow wayyyy down going into a turn and slow down some more going out of a turn...i'm sitting there thinking "holy shit! is he able to turn like that!??! he's taking that turn so fast!!! is it gonna roll over!?!? how on Earth can he be this good!!"...ughh...what is so hard about taking a corner? geeze...i mean its almost painful sometimes seeing these people take a turn...they have absolutely no idea what they're spose to do...they act like they're driving a semi or something...i'm not asking you to be a fuckin race car driver here but learn how to take a corner shitheads!
Conclusion to Texas Drivers
You people are fucking insane!!! If you do NOT know how to operate your vehicle properly, you need to take that piece of shit of yours home and park it!!!!...how did these assholes get their licenses? HOW!?!?...who on EARTH would give some of these people a license!?!?...did i miss something when i got mine? do you like win money if you piss someone off enough or kill someone?...its like "oh, you drove shitty on your drivers test, but we're gonna help you out today, we'll give you this special offer...the more people you piss off, the more points you get!"...more like a license to kill...people are insane here...my father whos driven all over the world and even in places like new york city, los angeles, chicago, the autoban in Germany, says theres only ONE place worse than Houston Texas when it comes to driving...thats somewhere in Asia...but geeze!!! even compared to places like new york city and L.A.!??...you've GOT to be fucking kidding me
I know you're thinking "man, this guy has some serious road rage"...but no, i don't...you drive here and you'll see...you're taking your life into your hands here...stay away...stay far far away!!!
Okay, i could have talked about something other than that but once i get started, it just doesn't end...its madness here...i was going for being humorous there but all of that is the truth
**Bonus Football Predictions (sorry for not adding this sooner)**
New York Jets AT Pittsburgh Steelers
All the Steelers need to do is what they've done all year...run run run and occassionally pass when they absolutely have to...the QB (no, i'm not even gonna begin to spell his name) does not need to put this team on his shoulders...RB's Duce and the Bus need to put this team on their soldiers...pound the ball, control the clock, slowly move down the field, put up some points, let the defense do the rest...the only time they need to pass is when they have to...and then they can use play action...the defense is damn good, i have no doubt in my mind they can stop the Jets offense
The Jets need to take the Steelers out of their game plan...like i said, the Steelers are going to run run run and occassionally pass...the Jets need to score early and often forcing the Steelers to pass pass pass and occassionally run...we're talking about a rookie QB here...he's not spectacular and he's going to make mistakes...if you force the QB to put the game on his own shoulders, the Jets will have a chance to win it...offensively, the Jets need to throw it up to their two best WR's and give the ball to the number one rusher in the league, martin...their defense is good and if they can take the Steelers out of their game plan, the Jets have a chance.
The Jets are good and i was impressed with their victory last week but i don't think they'll be able to shut down the running attack of the Steelers. My Pick: Steelers 24 Jets 17
St. Louis Rams AT Atlanta Falcons
The Rams need to jump out to an early lead and keep it...they also need to control the clock...by doing this, you're forcing Falcons QB Vick to throw the ball...and you're keeping him off the field...the Falcons are all about running the ball but if you jump out to an early lead, they'll want to throw it and throwing it is not something they do particularly well...I've always thought Vick was overrated and he is...why? because he's not that great of a passer...on offense, just don't make too many mistakes and don't let the Falcons defense pressure QB Bulger or he'll make mistakes.
The Falcons just need to pressure and confuse QB Bulger...he's just like Kurt Warner, if you pressure him and confuse him, he'll make many mistakes...he's only good if he gets decent blocking...the Falcons defense is pretty damn good...pressure Bulger...on offense, they just need to stick with what's been good all year...run run run, occassionally pass...you have RB's Duckett, Dunn, and of course QB Vick...thats an awesome running attack...when you have to pass, give it to TE Crumpler, he's the man.
When Rams QB Bulger is on top of things and he's getting good blocking, its gonna be a long day for any team but i have faith in the Falcon's defense...I don't however have faith in the Ram's defense in stopping the Run. My Pick: Falcons 27 Rams 21
Vikings AT Eagles
I was very impressed with the Vikings victory over the Packers but the only reason they won it was because Favre crapped himself and the Pack had several injuries...fortunately for the Vikings, Eagles WR Owens is out, making things on the defense a lot easier...they have to focus on two key players...QB McNabb and RB Westbrook...if the Vikings can shut down Westbrook and do some damage against the Pass, the Eagles are gonna have a tough time...on offense, the Vikings are most certainly a powerhouse...great running game, great passing game...just don't make any mistakes...the Eagles defense is good but the Vikings are an offensive powerhouse.
The Eagles haven't played a decent game in 40 days or so...it'll be tough...on offense, they need to give the ball to RB Westbrook...he's the man and everyone knows it...they also have great TE's in L.J. Smith and Chad Lewis...now that Owens is gone, the WR's aren't so great...on defense, they just need to do the best they can...Culpepper to Moss is a deadly combination...don't put only one man on Moss or you'll be sorry...they need to pressure Culpepper...Culpepper does make mistakes...he's getting better at avoiding them but if you pressure him enough and confuse him enough, he'll turn it over.
Again, i was impressed with the Vikings victory over the Pack, and yes the Eagles haven't played a real game since early december but lets face it, the Eagles have been to 3 consecutive NFC championships without Owens, who's saying they can't do it again without him? My Pick: Eagles 31 Vikings 28
Indianapolis Colts AT New England Patriots
Ah what a great game...the Colts have the best offense i've ever seen...WR's Harrison, Stokely, Wayne...RB's James, Rhodes...TE's Pollard, Clark...and a very underrated OL...all headed by one man...QB Peyton Manning...you can't stop the offense...the defense on the other hand, sucks...why the Broncos couldn't man handle that offense is beyond me...the Colts need to focus on stopping RB Corey Dillon and force the Patriots into a passing battle...if they do that, victory is a given.
The Patriots are damn good at doing one thing: Winning...how do they do it? amazing game planning...they need to do just like what i said the Broncos needed to do...keep manning and his amazing offense off of the field...you're not gonna stop their offense but you can control the clock and keep them off the field...RB Dillon needs to get 150 - 200 yards rushing...some short passes when you have to...eat up the clock...as long as the Patriots keep manning off of the field and don't get into a situation where they have to go into a passing battle, they can win it.
This is a really tough choice...even though the Colts have a horrible defense, and Pats RB Dillon has done a great job all year, only something unhuman could stop this Colts offense...i still say the Pats are going to make it a close one just because they're so good at game planning. My Pick: Colts 38 Pats 31
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What I have to go through in a day...whew
Wednesday. 1.12.05 7:00 am
And so, i shall make another entry...yes another...i know...you're all excited...what is on kollin's mind now...well, my dear readers, a lot is on my mind...so much in fact that you will not read all of it...for it would take days to really get out what is on my mind...some of it, you wouldn't want to be subjected to...i shall end the introduction with a very intelligent conversation with my friend Resa:
starIit kisses: i'm pms-ing.. you might not wanna keep making fun of me. ;x
AntiChangeLoser: lol you know...i went to Peyton Middle School...PMS...awesome, huh?
starIit kisses: lol
starIit kisses: that's awesome.
Ah *smells the air*...ah the smell of morning air...*takes a look outside*...what a view!...the birds chirping...the sun coming up...that fresh look to everything...god, i fuckin hate it
What I'm Gonna Do Today
Ah yes, my friends, that is THE question...so much to do, so little time...if only the day was longer...i could do so much more...i mean how do you expect me to fit all of this into one day? its quite impossible...but! somehow, with me being this good and all, i'm able to do all of this in one day...i know, you're shocked...you're on the verge of fainting because it just seems so unbelievable...how can one man possibly do it?...i'll tell you...brace yourselves...this is on-the-edge-of-your-seat information...first! i'm going to sit...yes you heard me correctly!...sit at this desk until eleven o' clock...*watches your jaw drop*...i know! thats so intense!...but with my determination, i shall make it...you mark my words!...afterwards...oh yes, theres more ladies and gentlemen...afterwards, i will get up and get ready to go...my god! the will power it must take for that to happen!...i know, calm down, my day has just begun...i know what you're thinking...what could possibly happen!?!?!...can't you hear the music in the background?...its like the mission impossible theme...dun dun dundun dun dun...didle didle dunnnnnnnn...okay, maybe thats not quite how you would write it, but you get my drift here...after i get ready...jesus, how do i find the energy to make it beyond this point?...yes, i am this good...i will get into my car, and drive to the goodyear place...*watches your jaw drop again*...i know! driving through such madness! is he crazy!?!?!...no! he is THAT determined...the music in the background gets louder...your hearts beating intensily...he's actually going to the goodyear place...maddness i tell you!...then, barely making it out of my car to go inside, i tell them to inspect my car...yes! you may be thinking "how on Earth can he demand such things from such evil beings!!!!!"...but i have dealt with worse!!!...i know, you can't possibly imagine, but i will save that story for another time...during the inspection, i will sit...oh yes, twice in one day...calm down...it'll be okay...i make it through this day...i will sit and *intense music* WAIT!...eeeek!...no no! i'm a trained professional at this stressful task!!...once my car is inspected and i've paid for whatever, i once again get in my very james bondish super cool babe magnet of a vehicle and drive off into the sunset...ah you're thinking it ends here...but i have news for you...IT DOESN'T!!!...the impossible has become...POSSIBLE!!!...but it was nothing compared to what Sir Kollin The Amazing is capable of doing...for this, my friends, is only half of my day...cue the music!...you hear the mission impossible theme once again...my very james bondish super cool babe magnet of a vehicle arrives at my castle battling the demon drivers of...*music gets louder*...TEXAS...along the way...I graciously step out onto the driveway...sniff the air...for it does not seem right...but i press on!...for i am more determined than a poodle trying to look like a real dog!...i walk to the front door...for god sakes man! the front door!?!?! you are thinking...i know, very dangerous indeed...but with my dashing good looks, stunning muscular body, and amazing determination, i get through that door...untouched!...dodging such visious creates as the...do i dare say?...INSECTS OF TEXAS!!!!...my god, those three words put together could make a grown man cry for his mother!...but not Kollin...for he is too quick and too determined for these creates!...i walk into my castle, which oddly looks like a one story house, and march my way to the kitchen...*shocking looks*...the kitchen!?!?!...yes, the kitchen...i open the refridgerator and with my amazing vision, i scan the contents...what do my near sided eyes see!?!? why nothing but food that really doesn't interest me...and so, after my encounter with the refridgerator, i move on to my room...to once again...DUN DUN DUN!!!!...sit for the third time today...if you have made it this far, i congratulate you, for you have not read all of my day...but you shall! read on comrades!...*intense war-like music begins in the background*...i then proceed to go..."no, no don't go!!!" you say...ah, but i have to!...to go ONLINE!!...and with such courage and determination, i proceed to look at articles about the NFL and type to...yes, with these sexy fingers, type to my equals...yes, my equals...you're thinking "how could such an amazing man consider himself an equal to me"...but yes, you are my equal...for i am not greater than thou...god hath made me equal to thou! (i'm usin the right words here right? tryin to be all old english and stuff...makes me sound cool and intelligent)...i proceed to do such stressful tasks for hours upon hours only taking short breaks to return to the dreaded kitchen...around 8ish, after most of my tiring day, my servants bring me a tasty and delightful feast only fit for a king (wednesday...probably something like hot dogs)...after eating every last bit of food, i go back my room and continue...yes, continue...for i'm so close to ending the day, i will not back down now!!!...no mountain is high enough! no river is wide enough! (i know, its a song, but you're spose to be on the edge of your seat here, pay attention!) to keep me from ending my day!!!...i then, at the request of my equals...yes, although shorter than i, equals...travel on a long journey throughout the very complicated pathways of...DUN DUN DUN!!!!...THE WOODLANDS!! (well it is complicated...i'm directionally challenged here people...sheesh)...i will then arrive at my destination with a sense of accomplishment for i have found my way through this complicated maze (granted i've been at Ashley's or Pete's several times prior)...i approach the front door...yes! the front door!...but tis a foreign front door!...nothing like mine!..."what does he do!?!?!" you think...i'll tell you what i do...i....i...*horror movie like music starts up*...KNOCK!...and i then enter...for i am not afraid!...i do not hesitate!...i proceed with courage and determination!...i then sit...you're thinking "holy shit, it can't be!!!"...but yes it can be and it is...i sit once again and observe such horrendous sights through a circularly challenged tube...for it is...do i dare say!!!???...CARTOON NETWORK!!!...*gasp*...yes but i stay focused...as hard as it may be, i still...stay...focused!!!...the view in the circularly challenged tube then gets changed by one of my equals...i observe more...you're thinking "such determination! such...such...there are no words to describe this man!"...i know, i'm that good...after my viewing session has ended, i bid farewell to my equals and travel along the most dangerous pathways of...DUN DUN DUN!!!...THE WOODLANDS!...on my return voyage...i then pull into my drive way...it is night now...the air is cooler...my vision, although amazing, fights the darkness...what creatures lurk!? you may ask yourself...what possible creature of the night awaits my return!?...for they are again...*you hold your breath* (i'm actually pretty good at holding my breath...i can do it for quite a long time...cuz you know, i'm that good)...oh oh, breathe my friends, for it is nothing i cannot handle!...THE INSECTS OF TEXAS!!!!...with such smooth moves and quickness, my lightning fast legs manuver through the pathway of hell and dodge any and all creatures...i then enter my castle and close the door before anything gets through...you whipe the sweat from your brow...yes, it is a challenge, but god hath given me these amazing skills...i then proceed to once again, sit...yes, sit...*mission impossible theme music starts up again*...at my desk...and do what only 100 hundred men wish they could do (yes i put 100 and then said hundred right there, why? i do not know) ...go...yes i must...go ONLINE...through my will power i bravely proceed to do this for another 3ish hours...then...and only then...i prepare to rest...although i am such a gifted man with such amazing skills, i am partly human and require sleep...it is possible to defeat me but only one living being on this planet possibly could beat me...and that my friends, is myself (i'm not very balanced, i'm sure it'll get the best of me one day)...tis the end of my day and i sleep...for tomorrow brings more challenges...but you may rest assured that my amazing skills will out do these challenges...and i shall press on saving the world one sitting session at a time!...i know...marvelous...bravo courageous kollin...bravo...one can only dream of being as damn good as I (at what? sitting? yes you do a damn good job of it).
I'd add more but i think the bull shit in this entry is quite enough to satisfy you...i shall return with more amazing adventures of our super hero Kollin later...for now, comment or something...took me a little while to come up with all that crap, the least you could do is give me a comment
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My Feet Are Freezin <-Nothin to do with this Entry
Sunday. 1.9.05 8:58 am
Hmm i'm starting this similar to yesterday's entry...can't friggin' sleep...and of course the napping thing won't work later on...its okay, i have a plan
Okay...no need for a nap...eat breakfast...something like cereal...wake me up...then i'll go through the day still being wide awake...around mehhh 12ish 1ish am i'll go to bed...get a nice long night of sleep...wake up feeling quite refreshed!
The Real Plan
Would really like a nap...won't eat breakfast cuz well i never do that...cereal? only time i eat that is at night...i'll be wide awake up until like mehh 3ish...hahaha 12ish, 1ish? yeah thats not gonna happen...i'll be staying up until at least 3 am tonight...still get a decent amount of sleep...will not wake up feeling quite refreshed...to be honest, i only wake up feeling "refreshed" maybe once or twice a year.
Ah its playoffs people!!...thats right, you lose, you go home, you win, you advance...i love it...i can't get enough of it...and guess what? My Broncos are playing today in the playoffs!...yeah against the Colts - again...everyone in the media keeps bashing my Broncos...the same little bastards that said the Chargers were so great and would never lose against the Jets in the playoffs...hah you were wrong!...if the Broncos win you have no idea how happy i will be...i mean, all through the year nobody has given my team the respect it deserves...they went 10-6...i'll admit, some of those losses were very disappointing...i don't expect the Broncos win at Kansas City, so i'll give them that...at San Diego, meh understandable but we should have had them...Chargers were way overrated...Atlanta just beat the shit out of us...that was not good playing boys...against the Jags, oh we had that game...one fumble and its over...definately should have had the Raiders, no excuse there...what was the other loss...oh Cincy...yeah that was b.s....for some reason they don't do so well on monday's...three of those losses should have been wins...we played like total shit on the other three...but lets check this out...the number 5 ranked in total offense...the number 4 ranked in total defense...and you're telling me theres no way these guys can beat the Colts? give me a break...at least give them the respect they deserve...in SEVERAL articles people totally skip over this game and talk about the Colts playing the Pats and/or Steelers...hello??? yoo hoo!! they have to beat Denver before they advance assholes!...i know their game plan and yes it can work...commit no turnovers, and run the ball to keep the Colts offense off the field...Yes, they have the number 2 ranked offense but they also have the number 29 ranked defense...drives me nuts, you know?...nobody's even saying theres a small chance my team could win...you'll see...you shall see!!!!...victory cometh!!!!
Watch the Broncos get their ass kicked and everyone who reads this gives me shit lol...ah well, i stand by my Broncos...i shall pray to the football gods for victory!
9:26...am...well i was at my computer until around 1 am...then decided that since i wasn't feeling so well and i was tired, that i would lay down...woke up 2 hours later at 3 am...i was really really tired for like an hour and a half after that but when i got ready for bed and everything i was wide awake...thinking kept me up...well and worrying...sometimes i think and worry so much that i can't get to sleep...at least i got 2 hours of sleep
My Dad, the Morning Person
Yeah he really doesn't fit in well here at the Anderson house...i'm a night person and so is my mom...i absolutely hate waking up in the morning...i do my absolute best to get every last minute of sleep...and i stay up really late...my mom usually goes to bed around 1:30 am on weekdays and 2:30 am on weekends...my dad passes out in his chair around 9:30 pm...during the weekdays he gets up at 6:15 am...how do i know that? cuz i've stayed up that late on several occassions...you think i'd actually wake up at that time on purpose?...on weekends he gets up around 8 am...crazy...how does he do it...and yes, found that out by staying up that late lol...if i could, i'd sleep the day away and be awake throughout the night
he gets really annoying cuz hes a morning person...all happy and semi-hyper...when i'm forced to be awake at early times, he'll mess with me...he'll make weird faces at me and be like "*jaw drops* are you okay!? is there something wrong!? you're up so early! do you need medical attention!?"...i can't tell you how annoying that is at 6:30 in the morning...when its that early, don't talk to me, don't touch me, don't even look at me...don't make one sound...someone will die if they do any of these things that early in the morning...there will be blood all over the walls and floors...all yuh had to do was shut the hell up and mind your own business...he gets a big kick out of it though...he also thinks i average 18 hours of sleep a night...thats cuz he's never awake at night to see that i stay up until like 4 or 5 am...insane morning person
No wonder i felt so crappy today...lets take a look at what i've eaten in the past two days...Pizza Hut Pizza and Chili...nothing else...and i'm considering Wings of some kind later today...i should just rip out my stomach and light it on fire...thats pretty much what i'm doing now anyways...oof stomach ache.
Just thinkin...and having songs get stuck in my head...Crash Test Dummies - Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm...thats the name of the actual song by the way...very weird...and after checking out Jessica's "reading" section on her journal i have U2's song Beautiful Day stuck in my head...both good songs...i'm trying to make this entry as long as possible...don't wanna go below my 5 page minimum mark here...i know you all would be very disappointed if i did
Should be a pretty good day...could go badly...but should be pretty good...i actually feel confident in saying that...i really think today will be a pretty good day...most likely, my social skills, or lack there of, will be put to the test here...but you know, just relax and be yourself...should do the trick...yeah i know, i'm confident now but when i get there i won't be...but you know, its my own fault when i get uncomfortable and things don't go so well...if i just loosen up a bit here i can enjoy my day...yesterday i did something i don't normally do, ever...but i was just thinking...from past experiences...i'm really not that bad when its just me and one other person...why? because i'll get extremely uncomfortable when that little moment of silence happens which in turn will force me to speak...i want to speak, mind you, but theres usually nothing behind it giving it that extra nudge out of my mouth...when i'm with a group of people and theres silence, hey, theres more than 2 people here, certainly they can do the talking...so i'm just kinda putting that theory out there to be tested...which is why i'm confident...cuz i'm pretty sure it works...and see if i can get started talking and things are going well i'll loosen up little by little and it'll be enjoyable...for me and the other person...loosen up, relax, just be yourself...we'll see how that goes at the end of the day.
Thanks for commenting on my entries...very long huh? haha...well theres a lot going on in this head of mine...helps me to get it all out.
I'm gonna go lay down for half an hour, then take a shower and stuff...then we'll go from there...hopefully my day will go well, and hopefully yours will too..."and thats the way the cookie crumbles" what movie is that from?? anyone?
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Wow I Should Write a Book: In The Mind of Kollin
Saturday. 1.8.05 8:10 am
So i'm sitting here, its 8 am, and i'm wide awake...did i go to sleep last night? no...why am i so wide awake!!!!??...this is insane because when 2 or 3 pm rolls around, i'm gonna be ready to pass out...i can either a) go to sleep now and probably wake up at 8 pm OR b) stay awake and hope i don't pass out in the day...napping for a couple hours isn't an option...why? i'll tell you
I have a real problem with napping...oh how i wish i could nap like a normal person...you know, you get home from wherever, you're a little tired, why not take a nap?...it takes me like 45 minutes just to get to sleep even if i feel like i could pass out at any moment...when i finally get to sleep, i'll sleep forever...unless a couple of alarms are set...so lets say, 2 hour nap...when i wake up, theres drool all over me and the pillow...not to mention this insane groggyness that doesn't completely go away until about 4 hours after the nap...the less time i take in the nap, the less groggy i am afterwards, and the less drool all over myself...but still there...when you take naps, you're spose to feel refreshed when you wake up...i feel like complete ass...ugh!
The drool thing doesn't happen too terribly often...just when i take a nap or haven't gotten enough sleep the night before...annoying though...some people snore, some people grind their teeth, i drool
Social Issues Introduction
Ah, big one there...haven't really covered it before on here but i shall this morning...theres three different i dunno, ways of being social...online, on the phone, in person
Online Social Issues
Online...that ones easy...you don't hear a voice, you don't see a face, all you see is words...with me, i can totally deal with that no problem...the only problem i still have is actually keeping a conversation going...i'm certainly not the most interesting person in the world so that goes against me...if people would just work with me here and elaborate on things it would help...i still worry about looking like an idiot or what the person thinks but its nowhere near as bad talking online
On The Phone Social Issues
On the phone...ah, you hear a voice then (you're thinking, no shit sherlock?)...i think i'm pretty decent there...certainly could work on that more but i'm okay...can't see a face, no problem...but that whole keeping a conversation going thing gets a little worse...its not like online where one person types and sends, two minutes later the other person types and sends...its real time...but i have managed to talk on the phone for several hours at a time on more than one occassion...i just run out of things to say quickly...but i'm okay...i hate those moments where theres dead air...oh man i go nuts...cuz i'm like "oh my god kollin, you have to say something, you know the persons thinking you're so boring, just say something, anything...do it now!!!!"...but you know, if the persons interested in talking to you and you're interested in talking to them shouldn't be too terribly bad
In Person Social Issues
In person...oh you have no idea...if some of you people who are reading this only talk to me online and on the phone then you have no idea what kinda problems i have...its like online to phone little step, phone to in person, huuuuge step...you really don't know...some people will argue with me on this and be like "whaaat? you're not that shy...you talk a fair amount online and on the phone"...yeah but its in person!!!...i can handle it a lot better if its just me and one other person...you can talk directly them...only one persons eyes are on me and paying attention...i still have nervous habits and stuff...i'll tell you everything that could happen out of being shy, nervous and just generally having social problems...eye contact...i dunno how to handle that really...but i do my absolute best to look you straight in the face...but see then i'll be thinking "hmm okay, eye contact is good, maybe you should break away here cuz i think you're doing this too long"...so i'll break eye contact, wait a second or two, and come back...i'll be paying attention to the person but i'll be worrying the whole time about this eye contact thing...i dunno how to handle that...other things...this really bugs me...i "blush" so damn easily...for no reason too...i can be sitting there, having a decent conversation, out of nowhere blushing...what the hell?...then i'm like embarrassed that i'm blushing and that just makes my face more red and extends the blushing period...sometimes i'll sweat too...like my face...i'll blush, get embarrassed, then my face will get hot, and i'll be sweating...so i'll have to wipe the little bit of sweat off my face...almost wish i could say "oh oh! time out!" get rid of it, come back and start over...i worry about where my hands are positioned, where my feet are positioned, is my hat on right, does my hair look okay...and i'll do nervous things like scratch my hand, mess with my watch, mess with my hair...it really could drive a person insane...if its one on one talking, i'm okay...if its like a group i'll pretty much not say anything, just listen
General Being In Public Issues
Just walking while in public is an issue...like how your arms should be...can't keep them straight and walk that way, you'll look stupid...can't swing them too much, you'll look stupid...and eye contact is an issue there...i dunno how to handle that...cuz i'll be looking up, accidently make eye contact with someone, immediately look away...but sometimes it'll be a fraction of a second longer of eye contact cuz i'm thinking "eee just made eye contact, look away, look away!" and then its just uncomfortable and i'm like "oh man that was too long"
Hanging out with Pete, Ashley, sometimes Jessica, and Jenna has happend quite frequently lately...its fun, i like it, i just don't speak...Pete gives me shit about it lol...i'll sneak in something here and there...at least its something...i'm not one to bring up a subject...i'll just listen and maybe add on to that subject...i'll have things to say, certainly, i just don't say them...i'm even this way when its just Pete and Ashley...not as bad mind you, but still
Short Social Issues Conclusion
I need to learn how to relax and just be calm...i worry way too much about what people think
See my hat is used for many reasons...i don't really have a decent way of doing my hair...i really don't...i can part it, but thats not really in style there...i can part it down the middle, looks okay...but i just wear the hat cuz i don't have to deal with that...i'm gonna get a hair cut soon and make it look better...just have to decide what i want it to look like...like i said, with the hat, i don't have to deal with hair issues...the hat also acts as kinda a shield...it can hide my eyes a great deal...so i feel more secure with my hat on...if i wear my hat loosely on my head and you can see my face a great deal, means i'm more comfortable...if its quite low, i'm extremely uncomfortable...in public its gonna be low either way...just cuz, so many people in one place...plus dealing with hair issues, i think i look better with the hat on...if i can get my hair to look nice, the hat won't be so much of an issue
I'm not really "in style" with anything concerning what i wear...relax fit jeans, some kind of t-shirt, boxers, long socks (see a lot of people wear socks that just come up to the ankle...i wear long socks that come up to like the higher part of your, how do you spell it, shin, chin?, ugh)...if i'm wearing shorts i'll scrunch the socks down towards my ankles...still i'm sure i look a bit goofy...got the watch, the hat, nike shoes (not expensive ones or anything)...i'm simple...but i do need to get some new shirts...something other than "west point" and "denver broncos"...i like the color grey for shirts...i dunno if you people notice but a lot of my shirts are grey...the majority...why? because dog hair doesn't show up on grey, food doesn't show as well, etc etc...its a great color...usually i wear the light blue jeans...i do have a pair of black jeans...and a pair of dark blue jeans...but i really like the light blue jeans...with shorts, they're like khaki shorts...those are nice...comfortable...i do have jean shorts too...i'm not a big fan of wearing shorts cuz i have hairy legs and the whole sock thing goin on but because i'm in houston i have no choice there...so i mean, thats my style there...quite simple, nothin fancy...i like being comfortable...concerning dress clothes i really don't have too much of that...i have like one dress shirt...i mean when do i need to look fancy? like never...but i do need new shirts, and maybe another pair of jeans or two
My Physical Features
I could go on here...starting with the hair...like i said, don't really have a hair style, gotta figure that out...my hairs not too soft, its kinda course, doesn't cooperate...using conditioner it certainly helps but still uncooperative...on my face, i have zit problems...i'm working on that...ashley gave me a bunch of stuff to use and i should use it more than i am now for that...kinda have thickish eye brows...i got my left ear pierced when i was 13, took the earring out, and the hole didn't heal up all the way...looks like theres a hole there but nope, its closed up...i don't think my nose is too bad...i've actually gotten compliments on my lips, and chin...i think i generally don't have great skin...like around my armpits, couple little spots there where i have like i guess stretch marks?...i'm pretty damn skinny around my arms i dunno how thats possible but there you go...little bit of a gut there you know, along with a little bit of the guy boobs lol...its not that bad...just a little...some more of those stretch marks around my inner legs...i'm not fat at all in these areas here...i just don't get it...i have hairy legs...like pretty damn hairy...kinda dirty blonde hair though so its not too terribly noticable but still...my arms are way too skinny...i have small wrists...but you know, i have really long arms...concerning muscle, you can see it in my arms...not much, but its there...with the gut you can't see any abs lol...lots of girls are like "ohh thats so sexy" the 6 pack thing...yeah don't have that, never have...even when i actually did work out on a semi regular basis...my feet are a size 12...i like that...although, gets in the way sometimes...not a very balanced person so i do trip a lot...my calves are another thing that bothers me cuz i'm so damn skinny in that area...i'm happy with the height...i'm somewhere between 6'1 and 6'2...i like being taller than a lot of people lol...i really can't stand it when someones taller than me...and i'm about 180 lbs...i was at 185 lbs and going up but i've been eating a little better and sleeping through lunch so that brought me back down to 180 lbs...i don't think i'm necessarily ugly but i certainly could use some work there...work out, nice hair cut, get rid of the zit problem...the first one is iffy cuz i'm lazy and i'll feel embarrassed when some small amount of weight i'm bench pressing is kicking my ass and such so i don't go work out...the last two i can handle...see my mom cuts my hair cuz she use to do that for work...but shes horrible at it...and i'm too cheap to get a decent hair cut lol...but i'll do it...i'm in desperate need of it right now
Girl's Looks and What I Look For
Concerning looks with girls i'm really not picky about...a couple of my friends are like really picky about looks and stuff and really it drives me nuts...i mean usually when it comes to looks a girl has some features that are good looking or cute...obesity i don't like but if you're working on it i have a great deal of respect for yuh...i don't mean like a little overweight...or just overweight...obese...chances are you're to blame for that one...put down the candy bar and do somethin about it...or like on the verge of death skinny...i think that bothers me more than obesity...i like a girl who when i go out to eat with her, she'll actually eat a meal...not some half a salad or some shit...and you know, i just like a girl thats real...not fake looking or anything...hair color, eye color...not picky about either...i'll admit that i'll lean more towards a brunette...not that i haven't seen really good looking blondes...i just tend to lean more towards that direction...so i mean, not too skinny, not obese, doesn't look fake...works for me...and i don't like girls who wear slutty clothes...sure nice scenery every now and then (hey i'm a guy, what do you expect) but not when it comes to someone i would want to be with...its nice yuh got boobs and all but not everyone needs to see them...some skirts look nice...some look like if just the smallest amount of wind came through, everyone would know if you were wearing underwear or not...don't like that...don't like it if she sits down and everyone around her knows shes wearing a thong...why do you think they call it underwear? cuz its under the stuff you wear...i know it gets a guy excited and all and i know you're all proud of what you have but really its just not a good look...i don't mind if you show a little bit off but don't go nuts with it...i don't see the problem with jeans and a t-shirt...somethin comfortable
I really do honestly look for that...a girl who likes being at least a little comfortable in her clothes...if a guy loves you, it doesn't matter what you wear...it doesn't matter how big your boobs are...it doesn't matter how much you weigh...thats kinda one of my "turn ons" you could say...that look about a girl when you know they're down to earth and "real"...not out to impress the whole world...and girls love the makeup stuff all time...i have no problem with that
Probably gonna sound corny here but its the honest truth...personality is really all that matters...looks matter some, gotta admit that...but its the personality that matters most...and personally, if you have a good personality, it shows in your looks...i'm just not a big fan of someone obsessed about their looks...i know i just bitched about the way i look but come on, if i really had a huge problem with it, i'd do something about it lol...and i know that when i find that "someone" its not gonna matter if i have a little bit of a gut or marks on my inner legs cuz they'll love me for who i am...and thats the way i am with people...i like you for who you are not for your looks
Guys Just Want Sex = Bull Shit
I know girls like to say all the time "guys just want sex" and they go for just the looks...which i hate when they say that...cuz i'm not that kinda guy...yeah i know i'm a virgin, but i still wouldn't be with someone just for sex...if i like you, its not just cuz of your looks...call me old fashioned but thats the way i am...sex is like a bonus...now i'm not gonna go so far as to say "yeah i'm gonna wait until i'm married"...buttt when i do have sex (oh might be corny but its just me) i want it to be with someone i care about a great deal and probably love
The Way I Feel About Relationships
When in a relationship, i want the two of us to be treated equally...i'm a giving person...i love giving a girl compliments, making her smile, making her happy, giving her gifts...just generally showing my affection towards her...and although i won't say anything about it and i probably won't even think about it, but i do expect the same treatment in return...and respect is a big issue...i'll certainly respect you, but you better respect me as well...honesty is the biggest one though...and by honesty, that includes like not being open about certain things...keeping things in that you shouldn't...secrets...i have yet to be in a relationship where the girl was honest (exluding the one with sara but all we did was argue lol)...i don't like playing games either...bull shit like "i love you but i'm not in love with you"...thats playing games...and if i give you no reason not to trust me or not to believe what i say, then you shouldn't immediately not trust me or not believe me...respect issue there...respect, honesty, openess, trust...i have trust issues myself but as long as you don't give me a reason not to trust you then its all good...cheating i absolutely hate...and any form of cheating...that includes flirting with other guys...no, it is not right...i don't expect anyone to be perfect but if i treat you a certain way, i expect the same in return
Most likely you didn't make it down to here cuz this entry was long...i break it down into sections but you people still don't care lol...thats okay, i like getting things off of my chest...although i keep a lot of things in...especially the ones that really get to me...those are always in the private entries...which probably right after this one or i could put it before this one, i'll make a private entry...these are the things that keep me up at night...like tonight for example, this one kept me up...I shall ramble on some other time.
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Tis Long, u wouldn't want to read it anyways
Thursday. 1.6.05 2:27 am
Tuesday. 1.4.05 8:34 pm
I've been getting some complaints about my entries being too big...first of all, too bad and second of all, i've broken it down into sections...so, read the sections you want to, comment on them if you wish...you can even read one section and comment then come back later and do the same with a different section...whatever floats your boat.
So i've had a cold/sinus infection forever now...or at least it seems like it...its like i get a little better, i start thinking theres hope of this ending, then it gets worse, then it gets a little better etc etc...right now, its getting a little bit worse...i have a runny nose and it feels like i need to sneeze 24/7...someone needs to put me out of my misery here.
Cleaning The Car
So my mom bitches at me all the time about cleaning the car...first of all, they were suppose to give me the car in august, which they did not and i'm sharing it with my mom still...second of all, my mom's addicted to cleaning...so no matter how spotless i can make it look, she'd still bitch it wasn't clean...i would know because i've cleaned it before without her bitching and she complained the same day...so she finally gets "fed up" and both of us go out to clean the car...what happens? the only crap that we clean out of there belongs to her...thats right...what was there that i cleaned up that anything to do with me? simply moving change from one cup holder into the other cup holder...when i get into the car, all i have is CDs, sunglasses, and change...any trash i have, which is rare, i put in a bag on the passenger side...the sunglasses always go back into the glove compartment when i'm done, the change goes into its cup holder, and the CDs come with me into the house...what did she have to clean? she had all kinds of crap in the way back that she got from the day care and she also had more crap in the middle from the daycare...i mean hey, when i get into it, i throw all of her gum wrappers and crap away...my area always looks clean...why do i have to clean up her crap in the back and get bitched at if i don't?...i understand windows needing to be cleaned and maybe a little sweeping inside...that doesn't need to be done that often...she just drives me nuts...i'm going "what mess? the car looks good inside"...we go out there, its all her crap in the back that needs cleaning out
Peace and Quiet and Punishment
So every now and then i go out into the living room and watch the news while i eat dinner...i just wanna sit down, everyone and every animal needs to shut the fuck up, and just watch the TV...no, i can't get that...every single time an issue comes on the news my mom has to talk through the whole thing giving her opinion...one of these days i'm gonna turn around and say "hey i'm tryin to listen here, do you mind?"...then theres Bandit, my dog...the other dogs are fine...they don't whine, they just sit there with their little pouty faces, hoping their cuteness will be enough to get food out of you...Bandit though, my god, i could go on forever...she whines, she picks at herself, she scratches, she walks around constantly, she even barks sometimes...someone please take the damn dog!!...not to mention that she sits in my chair all the time...thats MYYYYY chair...nobody sits in it, only i do...i put a step stool in it so no dog can sit in it...what do my parents do? let Bandit into my chair...so she can pick, scratch, whine, and generally smell like shit in my chair...making the chair smell like shit...i've gotten into a routine with it but i'm tired of it...i take side covers off, the pillow off, and the towel on the seating part off (my mom puts towels on the chair, don't ask me why)...still, the chair smells like shit...but this generally ruins my dinner...what'll really make it worse is when at that precise moment that i show up in the living room to eat, they put in a movie...a DVD...which is fine but because my dad is so damn def, he has to have the volume on full blast...the walls literally shake, objects literally fall to the ground...being outside, you can hear that he's playing a DVD...and they wonder why i hardly ever eat out there or watch a movie with them
I like peace and quiet sometimes you know?...especially in the morning (or most times in my case, afternoon)...its just generally nice, peace and quiet...but usually the only time i can get that is if i'm home alone...we got movies going, my mom cleaning the house 12 hours a day, the dogs whining and picking...on and on...Bandit doesn't pick, whine, or scratch nearly as much as when my parents are home...she knows she can get away with it then...with me, oh no, you will get punished if you don't obey me...i'm not mean or anything...i say "bandit stop"...she doesn't listen...i say "BANDIT! STOP!"...she doesn't listen...i walk up to her "BANDIT!!!! STOP!!!!"...still, no listening...then i have to beat her ass which then, she listens...we're at the point where most times all i have to do is make an attempt to get up and she stops...but she doesn't do it as often when only around me...when i have food, she never whines...never...but when the parents are around, alllllll the time...its not abuse or anything...simply physically letting the dog know thats the wrong thing to do...nothing bad enough to hurt it, just let it know
Same could go if you had a kid...you spank the kid, is the kid gonna do it again most likely? no...the kid will think "hmm i just got my ass beat for doing that, maybe i shouldn't do that again"...i got spanked when i was little...most times i learned my lesson...if you're gonna be all "now johnny, we don't do that", johnny's gonna indirectly tell you to shove it up your ass and do it again because johnny isn't gonna get spanked...am i right? of course i'm right...i don't see the problem with spanking...not hard, mind you...later on when they're glued to a TV or game system, then you threaten to take that away...see it works...a dog won't listen, spank it, it'll learn...the only problem with Bandit is that she only learned not to do it while only i'm around...creates a problem because i slowly go insane when she starts picking and whining and won't stop no matter what you do...now if she was only around me i'd 1) get one of those tube things dogs wear when they get neutured and you don't want them to lick themselves and 2) if she whines and won't listen, she'll spend the next hour outside or in another room...it would work...actually, i'd just sell her, or pay someone to take her if that doesn't work
I have a real problem with noises...i seriously do...i guess my hearing just really picks up on these sounds and it bugs the shit outta me...thats why i love peace and quiet...none of these damn noises...a vacuum, birds chirping, bug noises, dogs whining, picking, chewing with your mouth open, the sound of something being poured into a glass, i can go on and on...i can't stand it...most people can ignore it...i can't
Football Stuff (skip if you must):
So onto other news...the Broncos made it to the playoffs...ah what a great thing...the feeling of victory...i'm happy as long as they make it to the playoffs...sometimes i'll settle for a winning record...under mike shannahan, the coach, the broncos have only had one losing season...the coach has been around for a while too...something like 10 or 11 seasons...thats pretty damn good...and they got two super bowl wins under him...there were some rumors that the Broncos were going to get rid of him but then they extended his contract...which was smart...why would you get rid of a coach that has given you 10 out of 11 non-losing seasons plus two super bowl championships? exactly, you wouldn't...now in the next 1-3 years, his jobs gonna depend on the development of quarterback jake plummer...i know whats wrong with the QB...see he was playing for the Cardinals for like 6 seasons...most of you are thinking "theres a team called the cardinals?"...exactly, they sucked...Plummer didn't have decent players around him so he always felt he had to carry the team into victory...when losing, he'd make stupid mistakes like throw interceptions because of this pressure...so he gets released and we pick him up...he gets put in there and he looks great...except every now and then he makes stupid mistakes because he's still in that "i have to carry this team" kinda attitude...so he's throw something like 20 INT's and 27 TD's...you just gotta keep pounding it into his head that you can pull out victories from being behind without feeling like you have to carry the whole team...he has a lot of good players around him...just gotta be calm and wait for the right moments...which i think, probably next year, if not then the year after next, he'll be one of the best QB's out there...i'm telling you, this is John Elway part 2 right here...a Broncos Super Bowl is not that far in the future
Now lets talk about my predictions for the first round of the playoffs...Wild card round: Chargers VS Jets...Jets have lost 3 of 4 going into the playoffs this year, the Chargers have won 11 of 13...its in San Diego...Chargers win it...Colts VS Broncos...Broncos killed the Colts' B-team in week 17 but unless everyone comes out with their A-game, especially Plummer, the Colts got it...Colts win it...Seahawks VS Rams...Rams have beat the Hawks twice this year but its in Seatle and the Seahawks want it more than the Rams...Seahawks win it...Packers VS Vikings...Vikings could really come through but they've lost several games after week 8 including against the Pack...it'll be close but i think the Packers win it
Predictions of the divisional round of the playoffs...Patriots VS Colts...heres and upset...the Patriots know how to win games...shit they've won 28 of the past 30 games...but the colts are too damn good with that offense...Colts win it...Steelers VS Chargers...the Chargers have been a huge surprise this year (unfortunately) but the Steelers know how to win...with a 15-1 record, you know they're damn good...they didn't even play several starts in week 17 and still beat the shit out of a good team...that says something...Steelers win it...Eagles VS Seahawks...Eagles are without their main WR, Terrell Owens, but they're still better than last year...Seahawks have a lot of potential but its no match for this kind of team...Eagles win it...Falcons VS Packers...this will be close but the Packers don't exactly have an outstand defense...between a decent defense, the number 1 rushing offense, and it being in Atlanta, i say the Falcons win it.
Predictions of the championships...AFC Championship: Steelers VS Colts...the number 1 defense VS the number 1 offense...theres only one problem here...the Colts have a very crappy defense, and that gets the best of them...Steelers win it...NFC Championship: Eagles VS Falcons...Eagles have lost 3 championships in a row and they're without TO...will that stop them? no...they have a great defense, and despite the loss at WR, they still have a lot of talent on offense...they'll contain QB Vick enough to pull out a close one.
Super Bowl: Steelers VS Eagles...i know, not a surprise pick here but hey, the NFC only has two elite teams, Eagles being one of them, and in the AFC, the Steelers know how to get it done with that number 1 defense...It'll be close, i guarentee it...and TO might even be able to play...its tough to call...two great defenses...two good offenses...it'll probably be one of the best Super Bowls...I'm gonna have to give the edge to the Steelers though...the Eagles didn't face too many really good teams in the regular season in the NFC and it won't take much for them to make it to the Super Bowl but between that, losing their last 2 games of the regular season, and TO just coming back from hurting his leg, it just isn't gonna happen for them...Steelers win it in a close one
I'll be waking up before noon, i know, wayyy too early...i have to go up to the glasses place and get my contacts...afterwards i'll be going to the college to pay for my classes and probably get books...i'll probably do a payment plan ($350 now, $175 in a month, $175 in two months)...i uhhh kinda spent a lot on ebay...damn ebay...but i'll figure something out to pay for some of this...i have probably around $900ish...i may sell stuff on ebay just to get out of working this semester lol...then i'll come home...i might, probably not, but might go with pete and ashley to the mall...depends on if i can use the car...then after tomorrow i don't have to worry about school until i go back in like two weeks
It gets amazingly hot in my room...i'm sure several things contribute to this but my god, its like a damn heater...i mean i have electronics on, i always have the door closed, the windows always closed, and sometimes i have the light on, plus how could anyone get use to this weather if you weren't born here?...so now my lights off, the windows open, the fan (which is almost always on) is on and i'm in shorts...its still hot in here...not to scare anyone but its been so hot in my room, that i've been sleeping naked...and yet, i wake up sweating some even then...don't worry, most times the very thin sheet will cover up that certain area...but thats just how hot it is in my room...in the summer, it gets damn hot...when, and this is rare, its actually pretty cold, my room is freezing...what the hell?
Shall i add more to this entry or call it quits?...Ah, all of you want me to keep going don't you?...Come on, you know you want me to...alright! you convinced me, i'll keep going!
Just that one word brings back lots of memories...all of my friends and I use to play it allll the time...there was this one game, Techmo Super Bowl, that we'd play most of the time...ah great game...i remember playing it in the basement with my brother, my dad getting pissed at the computer behind us...good times...my favorite games were Techmo Super Bowl, Mario Bros. 3 (i could never get passed the third world, damn thing), Punch-Out, this other football game, Life Force, and probably some i don't remember anymore...good stuff...i had like 30 games for it...i never had a SNES or Sega...my friends had those and we didn't exactly have the money for them so it was all good...good times there too...but yeah, i downloaded NES games on my computer and started playing them...man, being able to save a game on an NES game makes soooooo much of a difference
So i shall leave it at that and go now...i'm probably going to get one of those "livejournal" things and do way shorter entries...leave this one for the long entries...we'll see...talk to you people later
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Band(s) of the Week
Metallica, U2, Elvis
Well my usual...which is procrastinating
I'm hungry...got any food?
"Warning...you are now entering the mind of Kollin...kinda scary in there!"