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My trip and spring cleaning
Friday. 6.6.14 1:49 pm
*Disclaimer: this will be a long one. You've been warned.*

Thursday May 22nd: the day I left here and arrived there, was definitely a great start for the trip. I'm not sure about everyone else here, but when I'm on an airplane, I go in to super relaxed mode. It's like I slow my system way down, focus on the music I'm listening to and zone out staring out the window. My sister and Vance kept me occupied during a majority of the 4 1/2 hour flight. During the chunk time that neither of them was responding, I read some of my book. There was very little turbulence and the small amount there was, happened somewhere over Texas, all while avoiding storms.

When I arrived, the only thing I focused on was getting out the terminal and to the arrivals pick up area so that I could meet up with Vance and get my official time with him started. Only upon leaving San Antonio did I realize just how tiny that airport is. Especially compared to SeaTac or McCarran, two airports I'm used to flying in/out of. The drive home was quick and I acclimated to his place rather quickly.

The first night was amazing. It couldn't have gone any better. His dog was excited to have a new person to play/cuddle with/lick. Within a few days I had been eagerly and wholly accepted by the dog. Even the cat took to me quickly, which is apparently something that doesn't happen often. His dad and his dad's girlfriend welcomed me with open arms and ensured that I felt as comfortable as possible. It was probably the warmest welcome I've felt in a long time.

Friday May 23rd: My first full day there was spent acclimating some more, sleeping in, breakfast in bed, hanging out until we were ready to take on the day. We drove around the city, stopped at a few different stores. I bought a couple 3D jigsaw puzzles that I planned on leaving at the house. We stopped at this really awesome Mexican place not far from his place. The food there was awesome. Even without my ability to eat BBQ sauce.

Saturday May 24th: Another day spent just hanging out and enjoying each other's company. We went to a couple more stores in search of more puzzles, but with not much success. We also got some really awesome pizza {Z Pizza, which is the place I order from here in Seattle} and his family loved it. That night we went to a bar and watched his cousin's band play. The music was loud and really good considering it was a bunch of high school students. It was a nice end to the day.

Sunday May 25th: This was probably the best day of the whole trip. It certain was the most active of the entire 10 days. This was our Six Flags Fiesta Texas day. We got up in the morning and headed out to the park right around the time that it opened. By the time we arrived, it had been open for about 20 minutes. Once we were in the park, we got a map and figured out a game plan.

The only rides we went on were the roller coasters and that's all we needed. We made sure to ride each one once, then picked our top 3 and rode them again, but in the front row. The best out of all of them was the Iron Rattler. None of the other rides could compare. One rip off that we noticed was that they served the same food throughout the entire park. Now, this may not seem like a rip off up front, but when you walk halfway across the park to eat food at Johnny Rockets, then later realize Bubba's and Chuck's happen to have exactly the same menu with exactly the same prices, we were a bit peeved. That was the only unlikable thing about the entire day.

We ended the night with the fireworks and laser show. There was lightning in the distance and I had a hard time paying attention to the laser show due to the distraction of the lightning. I pretty much kept my neck twisted halfway home so that I could keep watching the show in the sky. When we got home, we went out on the back patio to continue watching the lightning. Eventually it moved on and we got tired enough to crash out for the night.

Monday May 26th: Memorial Day. This was the only free day that we had the opportunity to drive up to Austin, but since it was a holiday, a lot of things were closed. Instead, we took this day to hang out inside, listen to the rain and thunder outside, cuddle up and watch some movies. We went to the store and bought supplies for me to cook dinner the next night and just enjoyed each other's company.

Tuesday May 27th: We started out the day sleeping in; I think this occurred every day I was there. Once we got up and showered, we went to Longhorn Steakhouse for lunch. It was pretty darn tasty. I ate so much good food while I was there. He had to work that afternoon so I took a nap while he was doing that. I also took the time to complete another jigsaw puzzle that I had bought. Then when he got off work, he helped me cook dinner and we enjoyed it as a family unit before calling it a night.

Wednesday May 28th: He had to get up early to work the morning shift so I slept in a couple hours longer. When I got up, it was only a couple hours before he was off work, so I scoured the interwebs and read some more of my book. Once he got off work, there was some drama happening with his dad's girlfriend's dentist office so we went to deal with that. It was a bit of a shitty experience, but we were able to get through it. I do believe that was the day his dad fell in love with the idea of me being a part of the family because I was there through it all. If I'm going to invest in this relationship for the long term, I'm in it all the way; the good, bad and the ugly.

After the whole ordeal occurred, we drove up to his grandmother's place to hang out for a while then drove to the other one to star-gaze. It was a really nice, relaxing evening.

Thursday May 29th: This was the day of the Riverwalk. His cousin was able to get us a really nice deal at the hotel she worked at and surprised us with chocolate covered strawberries and iced champagne in the room, along with a card welcoming us and wishing us a good time. It was super awesome of her to do that for us. We walked around and had a couple drinks during happy hour at a bar. Then we stopped for ice cream, found the place we were gonna eat dinner at and made a reservation before continuing our journey. We walked over to where the Alamo was located and just kind of admired from a distance before going back to the Riverwalk.

About an hour before our dinner reservation, we headed back to the hotel and got all dressed up nice for it. The food was soooooo good! I still can't believe how delicious the food was. We'll definitely be going back to that place the next time I'm in San Antonio. Even if we don't actually stay on the Riverwalk, the food is worth the trip downtown. After dinner we headed back to the hotel, stuffed, and just relaxed in the room. We took a late night bath, which was more challenging than we anticipated cuz the tub was really small. We eventually gave up and went back to watching useless television before passing out for the night.

Friday May 30th: After sleeping in, showering and packing up our overnight bag, we headed back to the house. We decided to see a movie that afternoon and stopped at a tasty seafood place for dinner. There really was so much good food and I still didn't even get to try it all. It was also my sister's birthday and I talked to her for a bit while Vance was out and about running errands for his dad.

Saturday May 31st: My final day there. It was a rather somber day. I tried really hard to make the most of the day and try to stay in an upbeat mood, but I had a hard time fighting back the tears. We went to the IMAX theater by Six Flags, and joked saying that we were gonna take a detour and just ride the Iron Rattler over and over instead of seeing a movie. Maleficent was a great movie. I would highly recommend seeing it if you get the chance. I actually like that story line better than the original Sleeping Beauty.

After the movie we stopped at a BBQ place so that I could try the chicken tenders that Vance had been raving about the whole trip and they were pretty tasty. I think I might have enjoyed them a little more if I hadn't had an upset stomach. We pretty much just hung out together before he had to take me back to the airport. Now, I know that I'm supposed to be there two hours before the flight, but next time, I'm only going to be there an hour before. The place is so small and it took no time getting through security. It reminded me a lot of Tucson airport.

My flight back was only 4 hours and I was home and in bed by 11. There was no time to re-acclimate to Seattle life before jumping back in to my work routine so it was a really long week. It's nice having a day off, despite the fact that I had been off all last week. From now on when I take a trip, I'll make sure I have at least a day to rest before jumping back in to work.

I spent the morning cleaning, which my room was in desperate need of. I got all of my dishes washed, cleaned the counters, dusted the tile floor, vacuumed the carpet and cleaned up some of the crap on my floor. I also got my laundry done today, instead of waiting until tomorrow after work, like I normally would, because I have some grocery shopping I need to do and I didn't want to feel rushed. The corner of the room still looks pretty messy, but it's an organized mess. There's a lot of boxes in the corner and with the limited space in my room, there's really not much I can do with them to get them out of the way.

Alright, I do believe this is probably the longest entry I've written in at least a year. I need to get some food in my system. Vance won't be happy if he finds out I've been up since 9 and haven't eaten anything yet. I know there's nothing he can do about whether I eat or not, but I don't like making him upset, which is what happens when my food consumption is lacking. Now to figure out what I want to actually eat.

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Back to reality
Sunday. 6.1.14 6:03 pm
It was a wonderful 10 days away. I was living in a dream that felt very much like reality. Being with him felt more like a normal life than normal life itself. Having to leave; that was the worst feeling. I cried a few times leading up to it and made sure I kept my emotions in tact until I got home. Once that happened, however, I broke down. I just couldn't take it anymore. I want so badly to be back there with him.

Have you ever felt uncomfortable in your own home? Everything feels wrong being apart from him. No matter how many times I woke up last night, he still wasn't in bed next to me. 3 more months, I have to go through this. We have to deal with this for three more months. Then another blissful 10 or so days and another 3+ months.

Is it worth it? Absolutely. I love him with ever fiber of my being and having the time to spend with him this past 10 days just solidified my security for our future together. The fact that being together and doing regular things just felt like it was normal life, comfortable and easy, is what convinced me. There was no tension or awkwardness of any kind. It just made sense. If there had been any doubt cast, any at all, then it probably wouldn't have continued. I'm ever thankful for the fact that there was no doubt.

I'm still not in the right mind set to be writing joyous things, accurately, about my trip so I will save that for a few days from now. Once I settle back in to the monotony of the life I live here, my runamuck emotions should calm down a bit. Until then I keep fighting back the tears and reminding myself that I'm a strong woman whose man loves her very much and is so much on the same page with our futures that it's kind of ridiculous.

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Hello nerves
Wednesday. 5.21.14 11:04 pm
I leave for San Antonio tomorrow and I'm actually getting pretty nervous. There are a lot of factors that contribute to the nerves, some of it being the fact that I was 9 years old the last time I took a vacation to a city I'd never been to. This will be the first time Vance and I will be getting together since the connection flourished. It's a different experience falling in love with someone via computer screen, but knowing who this person is at the same time. I'm also meeting his dad for the first time ever and it has me a little nervous. I'm not nearly as concerned with meeting his dad as I am his mom this coming September. I have a poor history with moms so that one has me nervous already.

It's only been 5 months since I took my last vacation and I'm kind of having trouble grasping the fact that I'm already taking another week off from work to travel somewhere. Having this second job really has been a nice pay off. The flight will be significantly longer than what I'm used to and I'm going to a place that will be all new to me.

Despite the fact that I've been counting down to this and planning this out for the past couple months, it feels incredibly spontaneous. This isn't something that I normally would even consider doing. All of this is new to me. And that scares the hell out of me.

Other than all of that, I'm really excited that this trip is finally here. I'm mostly packed. I have to get up in the morning to do a final, last minute load of wash before I head out. I really hope I remember to bring everything. My ear buds will be one of the first things I pack up in the morning. With this being a 4 hour flight, I will definitely need some music to tune out the people around me. I'll have a book with me as well. Hopefully that'll be enough of a sign for others to leave me the fuck alone.

My next entry may or may not be from the Central Time Zone, but there will definitely be one once I return. If you're friends with me on Facebook, keep up. There will be lots of check ins via Foursquare and a good chunk of pictures. So kind of like Vegas, but with a touristy vibe.

Until then. . .

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A few hours here, a few more there
Thursday. 5.15.14 7:37 pm
This past week, Saturday through today, I've worked a total of 65 hours. This coming week, Saturday through Wednesday, I'll be working a total of 62 hours. This is between both jobs and working overtime at the one. It's all because I need the money for when I get back from my trip. With having a full week missing from my first paycheck back, the extra money a little ahead of time will be helpful.

I also kind of started going to the gym, but only just a little bit. I've done weights once, but the treadmill 4 times. I'd do weights more, but I'm working overtime and my coworker does the weights at the end of our regular shift. So at the end of my 12 hour shifts, I've been going down to the fitness center and utilizing the treadmill. I'm slowly working on increasing my time and speed. I think next time I'll do the same speed I was at today, but with less time. The only downfall I've noticed is that my left hip is really bothering me afterwards.

Exactly one week from right now, I'll have been in San Antonio for about 3 hours. It's amazing how close we are now. Both of us are getting really excited, as if it was even possible. Apparently it is. I can't wait for my temporary escape from reality and dive in to my 10 days of intense bliss.

Other than working a fuckton of hours, nothing else has really been going on. I have a girl's night out thing tomorrow evening, which should be a lot of fun. We'll be going to the mall to get some shopping done, then going to Red Robin for fries and seeing Neighbors afterward. Two words: Zac Efron. Aside from that, I'll be sleeping in, going to the bank, stopping at the cafe for lunch and going to Trader Joe's to grocery shop for the next 5 work days. Needless to say it'll be a rather busy and productive, yet fun, day.

I'm hoping to write at least one more time before I go to Texas, so this will be until then. . .

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Counting down, flattery and the doc
Thursday. 5.1.14 7:26 pm
It's May 1st, which means that I am a mere 3 weeks away from being in Texas. The final countdown is in progress. However, since I've been counting down for so long now and having actually kind of stopped counting down over the last couple weeks, it's not nearly as exciting as I originally thought it would be. Oh well. I'm still pretty stoked that it's getting closer.

It's been stupid hot these last couple days. Hell, today broke the record for hottest May 1st ever in Seattle. It peaked at 85 here in the city. It's currently 81 outside and inside. I have my tiny fan on the second setting and it's still not enough. The sun will be setting in the next hour, though, so hopefully then it'll cool down a bit. Then over the next few days it'll go back down to the 60s where it belongs this time of year. I understand that I need to prepare for this kind of weather since it'll be hot in Texas, but that is still 3 weeks away. And it's Seattle, for Pete's sake. It's not supposed to get this hot until July. Our summer officially starts on July 5th. Not May 1st. It's not even actual summer yet. I'm so ready for the rain and cooler temps.

In having a discussion with one of my supervisors last night, it was brought to my attention that the manager I had previously tried to date was, in fact, interested in me and had even asked about dating me, but was told it wouldn't be a good idea because he is a manager. Even if he's not my direct manager, he's still management and can have influence over other manager's decisions. So the only reason he turned me down was for that fact. That would also make sense why things didn't get awkward between us after I had asked him out. Normally when you ask someone out and they turn you down, it becomes awkward because suddenly they're aware of the fact that you're interested, but since the feeling isn't mutual, they try to keep from being weird which, in turn, makes things weirder. Finding out that a guy I was crushing pretty hard on had mutual feelings pretty much made my night.

Tomorrow is payday, but it's the rent payday so it's not really that special. I will be spending most of my check on rent and both storage units, along with a couple smaller bills, but that won't leave me with much. Which means that I will be grocery shopping for cheap items and pretending my debit card doesn't exist. It'll be a challenge, but if I have to avoid going to the cafe, even just to say hi, then so be it. The next paycheck I get will be the final one before I leave for Texas. It will also be the one that I make my final car payment on. It's almost surreal knowing that I only have just the one payment left. 6 years of my life I've been paying on this thing and it's finally coming to an end. Kinda crazy.

I went to the doc today to get my annual check up. She decided that a pap wasn't necessary because everything was normal last time, but still conducted a pelvic exam. She checked to make sure the IUD was still in place and swabbed for an STI test to be done. The test results will probably be available next week. I really think I'm okay, but it's better to be safe than sorry. She told me that she wants me to go to the dentist ... ugh. I really, really, really hate dentists. It's a stigma from when I was a child, but I guess with my car being paid off this year, I might as well get all that I need to taken care of. I'll go in for a consult and get a referral to a orthodontic surgeon to get my jaw fixed. Then, once that's finished and healed up, I can finally get a complete cleaning. I think having to get that fixed is a huge part of why I've avoided the dentist for so long. Especially after getting it confirmed a couple years ago that I'd need to get it done before having my entire mouth deep cleaned.

She also wants me to start exercising again, which I really need to do. It made sense to stop when I was working an extra 25+ hours per week, but with the max number of extra hours only being 18, I have plenty of extra time to go work out. Also, my coworkers have been trying to get me to join them in the gym for weeks now so I guess this was the final push to get me to finally accept their challenge/invitation. I do still need to buy a sports bra, but Victoria's Secret is always having sales so perhaps there will be one soon that I can take advantage of. It'll be fun working out with them, though. I just need to get off my lazy ass and finally do it.

Alright, I think this is long enough. 25 minutes of typing usually gets me to this point, though. It's also been a little bit since the last one so there was some stuff to update. Not sure if it'll be this long again between this and the next one; guess we'll find out.

Until then. . .

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Stubborn sleepy stupor
Friday. 4.25.14 12:05 am
I'm pretty damn tired, but for some odd reason I really don't feel like going to bed yet. I'm being unusually stubborn about staying awake, especially since I'm known for wanting to take naps all the time. However, due to the fact that I'm pretty damn tired, I'm also getting rather giddy so this blog entry may or may not end up as a fairly entertaining one.

This will be one of those rare days off where I have absolutely nothing going on. I will most likely hermit myself up. It will also probably be gorgeous outside, since that seems to be the pattern for the days that I would rather hermit it up. Which is fine with me. I'd prefer to enjoy the sun from the comfort of my bed, safely hidden behind the blinds.

I technically get paid every week, with the Sam's job paying in between the regular job, but I don't count these checks toward when I make references to payday. I only count the main job. So this is in between paychecks and it feels kind nice to know that I have nothing going on; not one single obligation. I'll definitely be sleeping in, once I finally go to sleep, and catching up on all my Hulu shows. There could be a nap at some point, but it kind of depends on how late I sleep in.

I'll be sacrificing my sleeping in capabilities on Saturday, but I so prefer the opening shift at Sam's on Saturdays because then it allows me to have the afternoon free. I mean, sure, even though I'm not getting off until after 3 and not home until closer to 4 because traffic is usually shit regardless of the day of the week when heading southbound, I still have plenty of time once I'm home to get my laundry done and shower and relax before I have to be in bed to wake up at the god awful hour of 4:30 Sunday morning.

... that was kind of a long sentence.

Anywho, I'm 4 weeks away from my San Antonio trip. I've kind of stopped counting down to people at work because it's still a ways out and people are beginning to get annoyed. I don't blame them. I've been counting down for a full month now and people are starting to get confused as to when my vacation actually is. Despite how incredibly impatient and excited I am for this trip, it's not nearly as big a deal as the Vegas trip. I mean, this trip is a pretty big deal, but my Vegas trip last year was an even bigger deal. I hadn't seen them in 3 years and I was far overdue to see my family. I'll be seeing them again next May and I am already kind of counting down. Heh, if I could get a ridiculously cheap deal on vacation packages for that far ahead, I'd probably spend the money to secure the trip now. That would bug the fuck out of my friends, but I wouldn't really care. It's my family and I miss them.

Work has been kind of all over the place this week. Tuesday is almost always the only day that sucks ass. I was ready to quit my Sam's job Tuesday night. There's only one supervisor, who really shouldn't be a supervisor. I like him as a worker, but he sure as fuck doesn't have my respect for him as an authoritative figure. Hell, the new person has more respect coming from me than I give to him and she's just plain weird. I dunno. I have always seemed to have issues with authoritative figures when they're introduced after I've been working somewhere. Either way, I went home, ranted to a couple different people and finally exhausted myself enough to sleep. I was so drained the next day. Luckily I only have to deal with it a couple times a week. I couldn't do that shit every day.

I'm still trying to avoid sleeping, but I'm running out of random shit to type. It's like that random self destructive rebel in me trying to break through. I'm not allowed to starve myself. I'm not allowed to perform any kind of self harm. I'm not allowed to do a lot of the stuff that I used to use as an outlet so this is one of those things that I can actually get away with without much scolding. Now, the only reason I can easily get away with it tonight is because I'm off tomorrow. If I did this on a work night, not only would I suffer on the job the next day, but I can name a few people who I'd have to answer to.

Yeah, I think that's all I have for tonight. I'll probably be asleep before 1. I've only been typing for 30 minutes and I'm already more tired than I was when I began typing. I should lay down before I fall face first on my keyboard.

Until next time. . .

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