I PICKED UP A PACKAGE TODAY AND IT'S THE GREATEST THING

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Okay so here are a couple pictures!

J sent me a book, but he also drew something for me and put a budgie bookmark in the package.


And a closeup of the bookmark err pendant thing.

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee I love it so muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuch!!

Also here's a bunch of apricots we picked in my backyard.

Nom nom.

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Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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Gym time today: 1 hour.
Total this week: 1 hour.

The gym closed early yesterday because of Memorial Day, and I was too tired to do Cycle tonight, so..... yeahhhhh... I only did Bootcamp today. I mean, Bootcamp is the most intense class my gym offers, but still. :\ Lately I've been feeling less motivated to go to the gym... When I was going so much before it was kinda just because I was unhappy and needed something to fill my time, but I don't feel that way anymore. Maybe it's okay to only go for like 5-9 hours a week? >_<

Last night I saw X-Man: Apocalypse with Becka and some other people. That theatre was so nice. @[email protected] It had leather recliners for seats. Buuuuuuuut the tickets were $15 (3D screening). I don't know if it was really worth the money, haha, but I did enjoy the movie, to my surprise.

I got some pćo de queijo and edamame at the concessions stand, and they were horribly overpriced and didn't taste great, but oh well. >_>

After I got home yesterday I made some fish cakes. My mom boiled potatoes earlier in the day to make mashed potatoes, and she left me a couple, and I was going to make twice-baked potatoes at first, but I forgot that you can't really do that with boiled potatoes, only baked (right... that's why they're called twice-baked, not once-boiled-once-baked... derp ). Sooo, ended up peeling off the skins and making fish cakes with the potatoes, cheese, and some smoked salmon we had in the cupboard. Ratios of things were off though, so they kind of ended up being potato fish pancakes. -__- Whoops. I can think of a lot of steps along the way where I messed up, but it was late and I was hungry, so... whatever. Here are my accidental pancakes:


Today I babysat, and the baby fell asleep in the stroller. It was hot outside, and hot in the garage, so I didn't want to let her sleep in the stroller in either of those places, but I didn't want to take her out of the stroller either, lest she wake up. Soooo... I brought the stroller into the house... but then one of the cats decided to climb into the storage thing underneath the stroller. At first I tried to get it to move, but it wasn't waking the baby up, so I just left it...


Would have just written an entry yesterday night after I got home, but my internet went out, so I couldn't. :(

Going to a Bernie Sanders rally tomorrow. I'm not really sure what that will entail besides... crowds of people who like Bernie Sanders. Becka invited me to go, and she's super excited about it. I have a positive opinion of Bernie Sanders, but not to the point where I would have gone to this rally by myself. Hopefully it's... uhh... fun? exciting? good...? though.

Listening to the waltz from Tchaikovsky's Swan Lake tonight.

I don't think I'll ever be able to listen to this or hear the words "Swan Lake" without thinking about that man playing the guitar in the parking lot years ago. Looking back at my entries, I guess it's been close to eight years since then... I guess I didn't write about it too much at the time, but that experience really impacted me. Or well, obviously it did, since I'm here eight years later still thinking about it. Maybe when I'm old, if I have dementia, I'll just repeatedly talk about meeting him to whoever will listen.

And here is another classical piece I like better. I've heard this so many times but had no idea what it was called until just tonight. >.>

"Liebestraum" by Franz Liszt.

So beautiful. T_T

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This is so good.

"There Is Nothing Left" by The Drums.


So I got this No Tox Life deodorant in like... November? December? And it's May now and I'm only like halfway through it. I mean, I'm sure it helps that I don't need to reapply it frequently and all, but damn, this is really going a long way. Very worth the $15! Man, I hope they don't go out of business or something. D: It's so hard to find good deodorants that don't irritate my skin. T_T

---Edit---

So today was meh-ish. I did some in field with my client at the mall and it was unpleasantly warm in there for some reason. I'm not really sure why; it seems like they should be able to afford air conditioning, considering how popular this particular mall is... It was REALLY crowded, too.

After I got home I had to practice driving stick shift with my dad, which was super frustrating. I was kind of in a bad mood because of my client, and I didn't really get much of a chance to unwind afterwards. Most of the time I walk around the mall or do something to kind of decompress after working with my client, but I just went straight home today instead, thinking "I don't really need to treat myself just because I worked today." But yeahhhh two unpleasant things in a row wasn't a great idea. I think it was made worse by the fact that it was really hot in the car, though. My dad turned off the air conditioner so that the car wouldn't stall, but it still stalled multiple times in a row more than once during the practice. -__-

Buuuuuuut I watched a bunch of videos in my Favorites playlist on Youtube and talked to my friend and then I felt much better. :3 We finally got to talk about some things and it's nice to have everything out in the open.

[5/29/2016 8:24:41 PM] Me: Sometimes I joke about marrying rich and spending all my time helping people for free.
[5/29/2016 8:25:00 PM] Me: But it's kind of like only half joking >.>
[5/29/2016 8:25:14 PM] J: hahahaha
[5/29/2016 8:25:22 PM] J: man i'd love to have a bunch of money -_-
[5/29/2016 8:25:27 PM] J: for stuff like that ofc
[5/29/2016 8:25:36 PM] J: let's both go marry rich people

I want to write something but I don't know what. Writing group is coming up next weekend and I need to have some flash fiction ready, but I don't really have any story ideas.

My mind is flip flopping between soft fluffy things and spider-filled darkness. When I was younger I used to imagine that spiders were everywhere when it was dark-- just covering the floor, the walls, anywhere. I would imagine them illuminated by my nightlight, because of course nightlights don't really do anything to deter spiders, even if they're darkness spiders.

I don't think about that as much anymore, but every time a spider crawls up my wall at night (it happens a few times a year I think-- for some reason they're quite fond of the wall right next to my desk...), I remember it. A spider was crawling up the wall less than two feet from me tonight and I walked as quickly as I could to the laundry room to get a jar to catch it in, and I imagined the floor of the hallway teeming with spiders I couldn't see. Even if it was, realistically I would probably just kill them by stepping on them, but for some reason it's a terrifying thought, as if merely touching them would irreparably damage me.

When I was little I picked a big yellow rose from the bush in my backyard. There was a spider hiding in it, and it crawled out onto my arm. I remember screaming and spinning around, trying to shake it off. I succeeded, but it disappeared, and I've always been a bit afraid to pick those roses since then. I still have, a few times in the years since, but I'm much more careful now, and I poke around all the petals with some garden scissors first to check for (why did the word 'assassins' come to mind?) any unwelcome stowaways.

I wonder if this could be a metaphor for my life. >_>

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There's a park I often drive by that has two climbing poles near the street, and ever since I noticed them I've had a desire to climb up them, but never did it until today.



I took my camera up with me, thinking that I could take a picture from the top, but there were a bunch of spider webs up there and I didn't want to get covered in webs so that I could hoist myself up onto the top bar. Sooo... no picture from the top. I didn't feel safe trying to hold onto the pole with one hand while working my camera with the other.

When I was near the top, these two old men walked by, and one of them started cheering me on. I was still struggling with my camera at that point, so I guess he thought I needed some moral support. I grabbed the top bar with one of my hands and he started clapping, then they went on their way.



---

When I was at the library a few days ago I was reading an article called "Odd Emotions" in Psychology Today. The basic themes of it were nothing new, but it did mention some feeling-related words I wasn't familiar with, like pena ajena, which I realize I feel quite a lot when I see super cringy stuff done by people who are totally serious about it and aren't just having fun.

THIS VIDEO IS SO CUTE MY HEART ALMOST STOPPED.

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Gym time this week: 6 hours.

So I didn't go to the gym this morning because I stayed up until like 5 AM chatting, but I went to Bootcamp yesterday. There were only two of us there, so the instructor decided to do some exercises she normally couldn't have us do because of space/resource constraints. We ended up doing some TRX suspension training, which was obscenely difficult. I didn't have an issue with the core exercises, but arms and legs, gahhhh. @[email protected] My shoulders are so sore today.

Last night on IRC someone linked this, and I kept rewatching it through the rest of the night. (Warning: Loud noises)

"Lesley the Pony Has an A+ Day!"


I honestly can't remember if I posted this song before, but I like it, so if it's a double post, oh well.

"Keep Sending Me Black Fireworks" by Of Montreal.


So this baby bird was wandering around my front yard yesterday and the day before, and it's possibly still there today, but I haven't checked yet.

The parents seem to be monitoring the area and swooping in to defend the baby if any other birds get too close, so I guess they're just uh... trying to get it adjusted to the real world or something, haha.

I went shopping with my mom yesterday and found this... very dark bag of popcorn.


Also saw these tiny little red cups. They're so cute! Perfectly sized for shots or infant frat parties.


I've been having some issues with dry skin on my face these past few days, but it's clearing up now thanks to steroid ointment. Yayyyyy modern medicine. Need to refill my prescriptions though. :\

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