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April 2021

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from the inside out to the open wide...
Sunday. 10.22.06 10:26 pm
Be it extremely emotional, controversial, messed up, or whatever, this entry has been password protected.

If you know it, enter it; or, ask me for it.

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Que lastima pero adios
Saturday. 10.21.06 11:37 pm
Ok, so I've never really had a thing with drinking. Never did it in High School and the one time I did it in College I quickly realized I wasn't too big a fan of it. My friends on the other hand enjoy this recreational activity and indulge in it frequently. I usually don't mind that they drink (i'm prone to one or two glasses of something fruity tasting myself) but when they get out of hand it's hardly ever fun. By now they've realized that I don't really drink and thusly don't push it on me - so we're cool with each other and respect our diffrences. It's days like today however where it really gets my goat.

Today was the first time I was to ever attend the Texas State Fair. I'm sure I blew it out of proportion in my head - but I don't care, I was beyond excited about it. We didn't even head on out until after 3 o'clock. The whole time we were there they were hung over and just not really into it. It was kind of a downer - I was ready to spend a good portion of the day out just walking around but these kids were done by 7. We were back home (and I was in pajamas) by 8. It wasn't a total loss, I did have a good time and all...it just got to me a little bit ya know?

Not to mention:
I finally quit my job. It wasn't a bad job - the pay while not awesome was enough to live off of, I just need to focus. All of a sudden as I'm leaving all these people are coming out of the wood work. Some have only been in the wood work for a day! It's so weird. There's this kid (he's a bit younger than me) but you look at him and you even get to know him a little bit - he's quite a serious kid, we never even talked all that much...he called me 'tight'. Lol, it's a compliment - i'll give you that, but it was beyond weird. Today I got a comment on my facebook, I worked with this girl last friday (who was uber cool) and it said "i am so depressed you're quitting after i just met you! you were by far the coolest person at the theater!". *confused face* I sent her a comment back that we should hang out (and she should give me free movies...lol). There's also Andrea (a ex-coworker from forever and a year ago) who has also recently been calling to hang out. It's weird. I'm not used to people wanting to hang out with me. I'm not saying it's a bad thing at all - I mean these kids are awesome in a BUNCH of ways, it's just....new. I'm not sure how to deal with it yet.

In other news: I'm looking foward to Halloween like nobody's business. I've bought my costume and my pumpkin. On monday I'm going to carve out my jack-o-lantern and my weekend looks like it's going to be a blast. I hope things go well.

p.s. To the boy who lives above me:
Quit being so cool and making me want to figure out a way to meet you. It's creeping ME out. They need to make the walls in this place thicker...Seriously.

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Painting the walls.
Wednesday. 10.18.06 2:30 pm

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The Middle
Tuesday. 10.17.06 1:42 am
Hey, don't write yourself off yet
It's only in your head you feel left out or
looked down on.
Just try your best, try everything you can.
And don't you worry what they tell themselves when you're away.


[Chorus]
It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle of the ride. Everything (everything) will be just fine, everything (everything) will be alright (alright).

Hey, you know they're all the same.
You know you're doing better on your own, so don't buy in.
Live right now.
Yeah, just be yourself.
It doesn't matter if it's good enough for someone else.

[Chorus x2]
It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle of the ride.
Everything (everything) will be just fine, everything (everything) will be alright (alright).

Hey, don't write yourself off yet.
It's only in your head you feel left out or
looked down on.
Just do your best, do everything you can.
And don't you worry what the bitter hearts are gonna say.

[Chorus x2]
It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle of the ride.
Everything (everything) will be just fine, everything (everything) will be alright (alright).

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